


We're Here For A Long Time Not A Good Time

by no_dang_idea



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Deceit Sanders, Abusive Relationships, Adventure Time Spoilers, Angst, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders - Freeform, Blood Loss, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Bulimia, Cartoon Therapy - Freeform, Coma, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders - Freeform, Cuddling & Snuggling, Descriptive gore, Eating Disorders, Emotional, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Flashbacks, Fluff, Gentle Sex, Graphic Description, He is a meanie in this, Heavy Angst, How Do I Tag, How did I not tag that already?!, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Is she a character? I'm just putting her in additional, Logic | Logan Sanders - Freeform, Logicality get together!!!, Look there is fluff!, Lots of Crying, Major Character Injury, Mean Deceit Sanders, Medical, Medical Inaccuracies, Morality | Patton Sanders - Freeform, More dark themes in future chapters yay, Nightmares, Past Rape/Non-con, Platonic Cuddling, Rape, Roman has wings, Sad people comforting each other, Sanders Sides (Video Blogging RPF), Self Confidence Issues, Self-Harm, Seriously this is buckets full of angst I apologize in advance, Smut, Sorry for anyone who sympathizes with the slimy boi, Surgery, Swearing, That is a blatant lie everything is sad, The dragonwitch, Those two tags honestly describe this fic very accurately, Violence, Virgil is touch starved don't fight me on this, Wings, cute little kisses, everything is fine, get ready for a wild freaking ride, mentions of depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-04-13 18:09:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 40
Words: 80,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14118009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/no_dang_idea/pseuds/no_dang_idea
Summary: This starts out with Virgil being captured by the dragonwitch and honestly? It just goes downhill for everyone involved from thereBasically really angsty prinxiety with some logicalityThis was originally a roleplay (still basically word-for-word tbh) so I'll say that the co-writer of this is draw_your_perfect_world on Instagram (awesome human being :D)





	1. The Dragonwitch Returns

The first thing Virgil noticed when he woke up was that his head hurt. He sat up and rubbed the back of his head. He then noticed that he was definitely not in his room. The walls of the dark room were made of stone, like a tower or a dungeon. "...H-hello?" he called out nervously, getting up off the ground. No one answered.

Roman was nervous. Even though Virgil would stay in his room a lot, it had been way too long without the judging looks and remarks as he tried his best to be as princely as possible. He let out a sigh before getting up from his spot on the couch to walk towards the darker trait's room, noticing it being awfully quiet in the mindscape.

There was one door in the room. Virgil walked over and tugged at the handle... locked. He took a deep breath. "Okay, you're okay," he mumbled, reaching into his pocket for his phone. He could text Patton, or call--his phone wasn't there. Virgil checked his other pockets frantically. Where was it? He bit his lip anxiously.

Roman knocked on the wooden door that had been painted black, trying not to seem too needy. But as the seconds ticked by and he got no response he got worried. He knocked again. And again. He called Virgil's name. After standing there for five minutes Roman walked in now actually being worried. How could he ignore him like that? He might have his giant headphones on and do-- the room was empty.

Virgil banged on the door. "Hello, someone! Please?" he yelled desperately, trying not to panic, but it was difficult. He was trapped alone with no way to contact the others. He pressed his ear against the door, straining to hear anything, but only hearing his heartbeats and quiet breathing. After a few minutes, he heard something, though.... scratching, clicking?

"Virgil?" Roman was screaming now, running around the room like a mad man flipping over everything he might hide underneath or in. As the whole room was turned inside out he let out a breath. He tried to contain the anxiety that had already heightened significantly after entering the room, knowing there would already be a significant amount of eyeshadow underneath his eyes as he combed his hands through his hair.

The clicking sound was coming closer. Virgil stepped back slightly... it sounded like claws. "I-if this is some kind of joke, it's not funny!" he shouted, unable to keep the tremor of fear out of his voice. The click and scratch got louder and closer until they suddenly stopped. Virgil held his breath, backing all the way against the far wall.

That's when he noticed, the wooden floor was scratched as if someone, no, something had come in here and dragged Virgil out of the room.  Roman now slowly developed his rage, already knowing in the back of his mind what had happened but following the scratches anyway. They led away from the rooms. As he finally realised where they were leading him he sprinted towards the giant doors, seeing that the gate in front of it was damaged as if something with huge strength or powers had blasted through--

Virgil stayed as still and quiet as he could, wishing there was something in this room so he could hide instead of just stand and wait. He could hear his heart pounding, and his panic increased at the thought that maybe whoever--whatever--was just outside would be able to hear it too. The door suddenly burst open and Virgil screamed.

"Shit" Roman cursed. Apologizing without noticing as if Patton could hear him. He ran through the now cracked open doors into the darker part of the imagination, the wildest things and most dangerous nightmares Thomas had created stored in that place. As he summoned his sword he looked up with wide eyes. A tower he had never seen before, much like the one in tangled but dark and thorns growing on the walls instead of light and fairy-tale like. He was about to summon a rope as he heard a scream.

It was just a silhouette against the light of the hall, but what stood in front of Virgil definitely wasn't one of his friends, or even a human. "G-get away from me! Back off!" he yelled desperately. The dragonwitch stalked towards him, her gaze freezing him in place. Virgil's hands curled into fists against the wall and his breathing quickened. "Oh god..."

Roman concentrated on forming the thing he wanted. As he was creativity he could manipulate his own body and the things around him... though he had never been able to make the bad things disappear. As he felt his back getting heavier he looked up smiling as he saw two jet black angel wings with a length of at least eight feet each. With a soft whoosh he flung himself towards the small window in the top of the tower, his sword prepared. As he arrived he hovered in front of the window for a split second.

The dragonwitch growled and swiped her claws at Virgil. He jerked out of his catatonic state and threw one of his arms up to protect his face, crying out when the sharp claws sliced through his sleeve and arm. The creature flung him across the room and flexed her wings. Virgil whimpered quietly.

Roman flung himself forward to step in front of the sharp claws that would have pierced right through the thin fabric Virgil's shirt consisted of. His sword drawn, he ran forward hoping to either stab through the dragonwitch or block the blow as she rushed forward with her sharp claws pointed forward.

Virgil shuddered slightly, gasping in shock when a winged figure suddenly appeared in front of him. The dragonwitch screeched angrily as Roman's sword clashed with claws, slicing her arm slightly. "...Roman?" Virgil whispered, in shock.

Roman tried to push her towards the window, trying to get her away from Virgil. He pushed her out. She fell a few feet before lifting herself up into the air again. Roman was now in flight too, the both of them trying to make the other fall. Right as Roman flung his sword, which destroyed one of her wings, he felt a sharp pain in his leg. The falling witch had scratched his leg, the blood already seeping through the fabric. He slowly returned to the small window to see if Virgil was alright.

Virgil was standing on shaky legs at the window, having gotten up and seen the end of their fight. "R-roman... you're hurt..." he mumbled, paying little attention to the deep scratches in his own arm. "Your leg... y-you have wings!" he burst out suddenly, gripping the ledge of the window. "What... how did I... did you... Am I dreaming?" His hands trembled slightly.

Roman laughed but let out a scream of pain as he landed on his legs and crashed to the floor.  He looked up at Virgil and concentrated, making a bandage appear around his scratched open arm. "Not important now. Let's just get you out of here." He slowly lifted himself up until he was sitting on the windowsill, lifting himself up into the sky again and reaching for Virgil so he could pick him up into his arms, knowing they needed to hurry before he himself fainted of blood loss.

Virgil hesitated. "Only... o-only if you're sure you can make it back safe... You need h-help, your leg...” Roman nodded quickly and Virgil carefully wrapped his arms around Roman's neck, hissing softly when he put pressure on his injured arm. "A-are you really sure?" he whispered.

Roman nodded, ignoring the lightheaded feeling he quickly flew towards the gate. The flight lasted for about five minutes, Roman slightly blushing, though he would've been red like a tomato if it wasn't for him focusing on not fainting. As soon as they arrived he set down Virgil, smiling softly as he let go of his hand before his eyes rolled upwards and he crashed to the floor. The last thing he saw was Virgil's slightly dirty knees as he kneeled beside Roman and screamed something he didn't hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whee! Stay tuned if you want to read more angst in the future and comment any praise and/or criticism below. Love you all, make good choices -Ro


	2. Consequences

"Logan!" he screamed again, shaking the unconscious prince slightly. He got up and sprinted to logic's door, banging frantically until he opened it. "Help, Roman, blood, fainted, fight, blood, o-oh god please help!" Virgil grabbed his hand, tears in his eyes.

Roman felt like he was floating, his body weightless. He drifted around before he suddenly felt like he was falling. With a scream he fell, his wings flapping around behind him in distress as he tried to fly, to break his fall, to do anything. But he was falling. And fall he did for what seemed like forever, screaming until his throat got sore.

Virgil knelt beside Roman, sobbing as Logan worked on his leg. The prince was screaming in pain. Virgil clung to his hand. "You're hurting him!" he cried at Logan. "Look at his face!"

Logan kept working. "The wound needs to be cleaned, or it will get worse."

"How can you say that so calmly when he's screaming?!" Virgil yelled.

Logan got up and gently pulled him away from Roman, leading him out of the room. "You need to calm down, this is distressing you more," he said evenly. "Patton?" he called. The dad rushed into the room.

Roman woke up and realised he was screaming. Not realising the odd thing, being his wings still being there, he screamed as a pain shot through his leg like a thousand daggers being implanted into it one by one. He was vaguely aware of Logan's voice trying to calm him down as he cleaned the wound which had been infected by the poisonous claws of the dragonwitch. The poison burned like acid on his open wound as Logan tried to clean it as best as he was able to.

Virgil sobbed desperately, banging against the door. "Let me in! Let me see him! He's hurting!" he screamed, held back from bursting in by Patton's arms around his waist. The fatherly trait mumbled in his ear as Virgil's hits to the door became weaker and less frequent, until he just slumped against the door crying. Patton gently pulled him into his lap and stroked his hair, whispering soothing words. They might have even helped calm him down if Roman wasn't still screaming through the door.

Roman did not know how long he had been laying there. His throat was sore and his screams raw and broken, his leg not feeling like a part of his body anymore but rather like a giant thorn that had to be removed. He felt lightheaded. The screams stopped as his eyes rolled upwards again. The last thing he saw was Logan bowed over the leg, the poison eating away the flesh slowly as the logical trait cursed, bits of bone now showing as he tried to clean away the poison.

"Please, please let me see him," Virgil begged through his tears. Every time Patton got close to calming him, Roman would let out another heart-wrenching scream. Virgil had all but forgotten about his own arm, and Patton hadn't noticed it. He was too focused on trying to calm the anxious one down. "Please," he sobbed. "It's my fault!"

There's not much there could be done. Roman knew that, his wings the only thing he could move a bit as he laid on the floor, the pain not even feeling real anymore as Logan whispered small curses and apologies as he started to realise the only thing he would be able to do was remove the parts that the poison had affected. Roman knew that meant his whole leg would be gone when he woke up again, though he didn't care again this point. He just wanted it to stop, the pain to stop.

Virgil sobbed desperately, begging Patton to let him in and mumbling, "My fault, my fault..." Patton held him close. He'd stopped replying to Virgil, who didn't seem to hear him. "Just let me see him!" he yelled desperately, hitting his injured arm against Patton's chest and immediately crying out.

Patton noticed the different pain in that sound and started pulling back the bandage. "Holy--" He gasped. "Kiddo, I'll take you in, but you can't touch him, okay? Logan!" He yelled the last word.

Roman was floating again. Everything feeling incredibly real and fake at the exact same time. His brain on the edge of consciousness as he heard a voice yelling his name, a voice unclear and vague like his head was under the water and the person screamed at him from above, the water flooding his ears making him unable to hear the screams. Then everything was pain, his body tensing, shocks wrecking his body and screams spilling over his lips again, his body being held down by strong, shaking hands.

Patton had his arms wrapped tightly around a screaming Virgil, who had immediately started struggling again at the sight of Roman. "Logan, his arm!" Patton said urgently, having to hold Virgil down against the floor. Virgil's head was in chaos. Roman was on the ground next to him, and his leg... his leg.... Patton was holding him down. His lips were moving, but he couldn't hear anything over the pounding of his heart and his head screaming, "my fault, mY FAULT!"

Roman could hear the screams now. "My fault." Over and over and over and-

"No" he whispered before letting out a scream he didn't know he was able to produce in that sound and volume as Logan yelled at Patton to hold him down so he could remove--a scream coming from Virgil, a crying Patton as he summoned bands around Virgil's arms and legs to hold him down while holding down Roman's leg himself, a gagging noise from Logan and then everything was pain again. His vision went red, white and black.

Virgil struggled, thrashing against the restraints. "No! No no no no! Roman! Stop! Please!" The sounds coming from Roman as they--as they... Virgil screamed desperately. "No, no no not him! My fault, my fault, my fault, my fault..." he trailed off into a whimper. All he could hear was Roman screaming in pain and his own voice muttering "my fault my fault my fault my fault...."

Everything from there on was a blur of pain. More aware of the utensils against his soon to be lost leg than anything else. Virgil was still whispering the words over and over again. The image burning into his brain. Tattooing themselves on there for good to later be used against himself. His voice wavered as the flesh binding him to the unbearable pain became less with every precise cut, every apology or curse word. The only thing he could hear were the words that would haunt him. 'My fault.'

Virgil had stopped struggling. He lay against the ground and just sobbed brokenly. "My.... my fault..."

Patton gripped Roman's hand. "You're so strong, kiddo, you're doing so good. It's almost over, I promise...” His voice was even despite the tears filling his eyes and dotting his glasses. "Just deep breaths, Roman."

"I-I'm sorry I'm sorry my fault my fault my fault my fault..."

Roman thought the pain would stop after it had been removed. And it did, for a moment he felt the pain ebbing away. But now they had bandaged it up, the fabric rubbing against the giant open wound and he sobbed. Not able to do anything else but stare blankly at the ceiling as his wings flapped behind him, his eyes stinging and his throat raw. And the words continued.  He visualised them being burned into his skin. Tattooed onto it so he would never forget the echo in his head.

Virgil's throat was sore from the screams that had torn their way out, but he kept mumbling, even when it was just a whisper. He had let Roman continue without helping with his leg. Now his leg was gone, and it was "my fault my fault my fault my fault..."

Patton turned to Logan with more tears falling down his cheeks. "Virgil... his right arm. He has deep scratches, cuts, they look similar to Roman's leg but not quite as deep. We should..."

Roman saw Logan nodding and slowly removing his hands from Roman's leg stump, careful to not put too much pressure on it, Roman noticed, but that would not make the pain he was in any less. So he sobbed, slowly realising he would not be able to properly walk, to go on adventures. He would be a burden, something they had to take care of, something to pity. He--he turned his head to look at Virgil. Tears leaking from closed eyelids and whispering those two words. His face one of immense pain.

"My fault my fault my fault my--" He gasped and cried out when someone gripped his arm and pain lanced through it.

"Sorry, kiddo, sorry!"

Virgil sniffed and lay limply against the floor, the bands Patton had summoned all but useless as he seemed to just give up. "Roman," he whispered through his tears. "S-so sorry... So sorry Roman..."

Roman was vaguely aware of stretching out his arm to grab Virgil's good hand. Giving it a small squeeze as he felt the other shocking slightly as Logan got to work. With every touch he tensed up but after a while his grip weakened as if he had given up completely. "My fault" He felt a pain in his wrist, looking down his eyes widened a bit as he saw something spearing on his wrist. "My fault." The words became clearer now, black letters marked into his wrist spelling the words. 'My fault'

Virgil didn't know what pain came from his arm and what came from his heart anymore. All he knew was that he hurt, Roman hurt, Roman was hurt beyond repair and it was all his fucking fault. If he had been more careful, if he had been less goddamn useless then Roman wouldn't have had to save him and wouldn't be lying next to him with only one leg. "My fault my fault my fault my fault--"

"Logan, how bad is it?" Patton whispered over the constant mumble of Virgil. "Will you have to--?"

Roman vaguely hear Logan whisper a no. Feeling his body lose some tension, although he could only focus on it for a few seconds. His eyes were drawn towards the words now engraved on his wrist. Bold and very visible they seemed to sting a bit every time Virgil repeated the words. "It's not" he whispered, not knowing if he was talking to himself or Virgil

Virgil faltered for a moment, swearing he heard Roman say something. Patton rubbed his shoulder. "Kiddo, this has to happen... it's going to hurt. I'm sorry, but it needs to be cleaned..."

Virgil cried loudly at the sudden sharp pain and clenched his hand, not realizing immediately that someone was holding it. 'I deserve this,' he thought bitterly through the pain.

He didn't deserve this. Roman held his hand tightly locked with Virgil's as the wound got cleaned. Logan had quickly learned how to clean it out without the poison eating at the wound more and Patton whispered soothing words to the now quietly wincing side. And all Roman could do was pray, pray the pain was not as bad as he had to experience. That Virgil wouldn't start screaming in pain. And all he could do was hold his hand, feeling his heart break a bit when Virgil whispered "I deserve this."

Virgil yelled, straining against the bands that held him down. On one side he felt the pain, lancing through his arm, causing more tears to flow down his face. His other hand was being held tightly, and if he were more level-headed, Virgil would have been worried about hurting Roman's hand in his tight grip. He vaguely heard "don't say that kiddo, of course not..." but Patton sounded distorted and far away. The only things that felt close and tangible were the pain and Roman's hand.

Everything felt wrong. Virgil's voice having the echo in it they all had feared to hear again after they had heard it the first time. Patton was crying, his face one of guilt, hurt and worry. Logan looked extremely calm but, after taking a second glance Roman realised tears were running down his cheek, sweat trickling down his forehead and making his hair stick to it. And Virgil was screaming, sobbing, calling for anything, anyone to help him. To make it stop. And Roman felt helpless. "My fault."

Patton's voice started fading in and out of focus. "Hey, kiddo, so brave.... not your fault, don't say... Logan, how long?... Just a little bit longer..." The pain seemed to slightly lessen, and suddenly he heard a whisper, clear as a bell.

He opened his eyes to see Roman, blurry through his tears, and he whispered it again. "It's not your fault..."

That was the last thing Virgil really heard before he passed out.

Roman slowly laid down, still holding Virgil's hand tightly in his as the other sunk into a state of unconsciousness. And finally he stopped fighting the urge to do so himself. He whispered a small thank you to a broken looking Patton and a Logan who looked like he was about to break down completely before letting himself fall into the darkness he had slipped in and out of in those last few hours. Virgil's arm would slowly recover. With that thought he let himself slip away, ignoring his own injury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angst angst angst angst the google doc I am editing this in is literally titled "Angst fest" yeah  
> I hope you enjoyed this (but if you did you're probably either sadistic or emotionally masochistic)  
> Take care of yourselves -Ro


	3. Blame

Virgil woke up with a burning pain in his arm. He rolled over and saw Roman next to him. He moved closer and saw the place where his leg... used to be. Tears immediately welled in Virgil's eyes and he clung to the unconscious prince. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "This is my fault, I'm sorry, my fault..."

Roman woke up, slowly becoming aware of his surrounding, Virgil silently sobbing against his shoulder, whispering-- "Stop" he said and wrapped his arms around the anxious side carefully. "It's not your fault dear. She kidnapped you. And a prince would give his life to save another's." He smiled weakly, trying to ignore his still hurting wound. "By repeating that you'll just hurt yourself." '...and me.' He didn't say it out loud, he just slowly rubbed circles onto Virgil's back and held him close.

Virgil pulled closer to him. "I'm so sorry... even if you don't think it's my fault I'm still so so sorry..." He shivered and blinked back tears. "You--you saved me and I'm sorry it cost you so much..."

"Eh. It's alright. I'll manage." That was a lie. He absolutely had no idea how he would be able to even do as much as go to the kitchen, but he pushed that thought away. Comforting Virgil would be the most important part as of now. He would worry about his own well-being later. About the leg or the lack of it. About the words that still send small shocks to his arm every time somebody said the words 'my fault'. He'd worry about the others first. Because that's what a prince is supposed to do.

"You shouldn't have to 'manage,' Roman!" He cupped his face, ignoring the protest of his injured arm, and saw the pain in his eyes. "We... We'll figure something out, alright? We got your creativity, we got Logan the nerd... If worst comes to worst we'll just have to remodel the mindscape and you'll fly everywhere, okay? Patton will ask you for rides until you get tired of them." He tried to smile.

Roman smiled a broken smile. He wanted to doubt, but he knew Virgil was being honest. And as Roman moved Virgil a bit so he was practically laying on his chest he slowly started to flap his wings. They rolled over and both winced in pain. Roman muttering an apology but starting to flap his wings again. And slowly, very very slowly they rose into the air. Virgil walking on his toes as roman carried him half-heartedly and leaned on his at the same time as they slowly made their way towards the rooms.

He wrapped his arm around his waist. "See? You're doing great. And now you'll probably be even more pretentious, you have goddamn wings for crying out loud." Virgil couldn't help but look down at Roman's legs... leg... as they went. 'My fault,' he thought again.

Roman smiled a bit, ignoring the little sting in his wrist again as they slowly made their way towards the common room. Right at that moment Patton walked out, the fatherly trait looked tired and all around broken. As he saw them he stood frozen in place for a few seconds before starting to school them that they should rest and that it was almost unhuman for them to be doing this in their condition. Roman and Virgil just smiled tiredly, their hands still locked. Weirdly enough Roman didn't mind.

Virgil stood on his toes to make sure Roman was holding as little of his weight as possible. "I thought it might be better to rest in a bed instead of on the floor," he mumbled. "And we aren't really human anyway."

Patton sighed and shook his head. "Not what I meant, but go lie down then. And that is an order from Doctor Dad."

Virgil mock saluted. "Yessir."

Roman weakly smiled at Patton and reached out for him. Patton understood the memo and walked over, making it able for him to lean on the fatherly trait's shoulder as Virgil waved a goodbye and walked into his room slowly, Roman finding he wanted him to come back as soon as possible but letting Patton lead him to his own room anyway. 'You'll be alright? If something's wrong just yell and I'll be there." Roman nodded, feeling his eyelids get heavier with every blink.

Virgil walked into his room and immediately inhaled sharply. There were deep scratches in the wooden floor, too strong a reminder of the recent events. He snuck down the hall and saw Patton leaving Roman's room. As soon as he was out of sight, Virgil walked up and cracked the door open. "I can't... c-can't stay in my room... please let me stay in here? I c-can sleep on the floor..."

Roman awoke out of his dream state. "If you're sleeping here you're sleeping in the bed, it’s big enough. Also I wouldn't want you to feel unsafe or anything near that either, so if you ever want to sleep here just walk in and get in the bed. I won't ask why if you don't want me to." Virgil was taken aback a bit but slowly got into the bed next to him. Roman smiled softly and felt a blush creeping onto his face as he whispered a goodnight.

Virgil curled up next to him, hoping Roman was too close to sleep to notice his blush. "G'night," he mumbled softly, his eyes drifting closed.

Sleep was not an escape, though. In his dream, Roman came to save him again, but this time the prince just collapsed on the tower floor. Virgil sat next to him, unable to do anything to help as the pool of Roman's blood grew bigger... and bigger... Roman's skin was completely white...

Roman awoke from his half sleeping state as he realised Virgil was violently shaking. His whole body tense, he grabbed onto the sheets for dear life and whispered something he couldn't understand. As he laid his hand against his cheek he realised the darker trait was crying. "Virge? Honey please wake up. It's just a dream dear." He softly shook him until he felt he was awake, asking if he could touch him and then taking him into his arms as soon as Virgil had gotten a bit more aware of his surroundings.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... Stupid... You, hurt, b-blood... s-s-so m-much blood... C-couldn't do anything, useless!" Virgil was only half aware that he was saying this as he sobbed in Roman's arms. The haze of his dream and the similarity to what had really happened made it more real, and harder to separate it as "just a dream." Virgil clung to Roman's shirt and whimpered, "Stupid, useless, worthless, my fault, my fault my fault..."

"N-no you're n- it's not" Roman said, stuttering as the pain in his wrist got worse but holding the shaking trait close nonetheless. "It's not your fault dear. It was a dream I--you'll be alright." He softly started stroking the others hair as Virgil silently sobbed into his shoulder.

Virgil let out a shuddering sigh when Roman first touched his hair. He leaned slightly into the touch. "I...it's not my fault?" he whispered through the tears, looking up at the prince. "You... you promise? Promise you don't... d-don't hate me?" Virgil bit his lip, half wishing he hadn't said that. Of course Roman hated him, he had lost his leg and it was...... Roman said not his fault...

"Of course it's not dear. You got kidnapped, that wasn't your fault. If anything it's my f-fault." The sting in his arm got worse again, the pain now was so bad it felt more like somebody writing the words with a knife into his skin, over and over again. "I should've secured the gate. I should've made sure she wouldn't get out..."

"No, Roman, no!" Virgil cupped his face with tears in his eyes. His heart broke a little at the expression on the prince's face. "Don't, don't blame yourself for anything the dragonwitch did. You are good, and brave, and the opposite of her, please don't blame yourself... I swear I'll never blame myself for it again if you do, too." He bit his lip. "Please..."

Roman felt himself saying he promised. He felt how his hands trembled slightly as he did so. Maybe his body knew he wouldn't be able to keep that promise. He frowned, wondering why he didn't seem to be in control of his actions anymore, why it all seemed fake for some odd reason. His leg hurt, his wrist hurt, his eyes hurt and every time he dared to look into the others eyes his heart hurt with them. "I'm sorry." He said, realising it was more to himself then to Virgil.

"You don't have to be. You did everything you could, you did more than would ever be expected of you." Virgil pulled away enough to take Roman's hands in his and softly said all the things Patton told him when he was getting bad. "You're not expected to do everything all the time. Your feelings and health matter just as much as anyone else's."

Roman nodded along, vaguely aware of the fact that his hands stopped shaking but too focused on his own thoughts to realise anything Virgil had said to him. "You're good enough." The words almost seemed to be directed at somebody else. He had never and didn't want to realise that he was cared about as the person he was. Because if they saw who he truly was, stripped away the bold and princely behaviour and the layers of makeup and insecurity... they would not enjoy the being he was.

"Roman, Roman do you hear me? Ro--" Virgil gasped at a flash of angry red in the corner of his eye. He looked down to see the two words branding Roman's wrist. "Oh my god, what..? Roman, w-what is this?" he asked shakily.

Roman looked down as if in a dream. Finding he wasn't able to or not wanting to speak as he just looked at the words, them burning more and more as the words repeated themselves like a mantra in his head. Virgil grabbed his wrists and slowly but surely pulled up the sleeves of the shirt Roman had been wearing. Right before he got to the second arm Roman realised something and snapped his arm away. He couldn't see the parts his true self had tried to get out. The thin slits in his skin, still red.

"Roman, please... I'm worried. Can you please tell me what that means, what it is? I.... I-I'll show you my arms if you do," he blurted out, immediately feeling stupid. What kind of incentive was that? Well, maybe Roman would agree so he could laugh at him. That would still be good enough for Virgil.

"Your arms...-" Something clicked within Roman making his eyes widen slightly. Virgil had hurt himself. He might've done so more than he could count if both arms were involved. After a while he heard himself agreeing, Virgil starting to pull up his own sleeves. And Roman shivered at the sight of the cuts. At the sight of that one particular cut that went straight down his arm, the cut that hadn't been deep enough. The cut that made him realise they in fact could not die.

Virgil looked away so he wouldn't see Roman's face. "A-alright, now you," he said quietly, tugging his sleeves back down. He gently held the prince's arm. "Did... did you do this?"

Roman slowly nodded. Shivering once again as his own arms were exposed. He didn't say anything, feeling as if he would burst into tears at any moment if he made eye contact with Virgil. "Sorry" he whispered. The mantra still repeating in his head as if it were his only link to reality. As if, as soon as he stopped repeating it, he would slip away. Vanish into thin air. He felt Virgil's nails dig into his skin and as he slowly looked up he realised the darker trait was shaking.

"What about this?" he whispered, very carefully tracing underneath the two words on his wrist. "When, why?  ...Why, Roman?" Virgil held his hands gently. "I don't know what happened, but it wasn't your fault, I know that."

Roman nodded along that he knew that. But as he looked at Virgil he realised he wasn't able to lie to him. "I'll try to remember" He said quietly. And he didn't know how it happened but suddenly he had been pulled into a tight hug, arms wrapped in scars wrapping around him as a head with slightly darker purple hair laid itself in the crook of his neck. And he found himself crying. Not able to respond or react at the fact that the side he thought had hated him the most was holding him tightly.

Virgil whispered against his neck. "Roman, if you ever need to talk, if you ever need something, you can come to me. You don't have to be 'perfect' all the time, you're allowed to need help. If you do, I can be there for you, if you want... Just please know that you aren't alone, okay? You aren't alone, I'm here."

Roman shuddered at those last words. 'I'm here.' He tried to repeat that in his head. Tried to overpower the words that had been stuck there since Virgil had first said them. "The same goes for you." he whispered. Realising his face was drained with tears. "I'm sorry for the mean things I've said to you." Roman's voice was shaky and croaky, as if he hadn't spoken in years. But he felt that for once he felt comfortable showing a part of himself he usually would keep hiding away.

Virgil gently rubbed Roman's arms. "I forgive you, Ro, and I'm sorry, too. I'm sorry for all the mean things I said to you." He cuddled closer. "I want to be... I want us to be f-friends?" he hedged. He really wanted more, but why would Roman ever want him? Friends would be better than the names.

Roman's heart dropped and leaped at the same time. "Yeah I'd like that... friends." They enjoyed each other's warmth for a while longer, Roman feeling a new kind of pain as the word friends shot through his head. All the different ways he could've said it and all the different things he liked Virgil to say instead of friends. But why would he ever want to be more than that?

Virgil cuddled closer and yawned softly. Roman was very warm and comforting, and Virgil could feel himself relaxing. Patton would always give him hugs, but this... this was what he was missing. Somehow, this touch was exactly what he needed. Virgil moved as close as he could.

Roman noticed the others attempts on trying to get closer and smiled softly, wrapping his arms tighter around the darker trait and moving slightly so they would be able to sit closer, repressing a squeal as the other let out a small sigh at the comfort. And Roman had to admit that this in fact was really nice. The way the other seemed to be warming up quickly, his cold hands slowly getting warmer as Roman leaned his head on top of the other's. And for a moment he could truly say he felt happy.

"Ro, you should probably try 'n get some sleep," Virgil mumbled softly. "I'll try to have happy dreams so you don't have to get woken up by me, mkay?" he chuckled softly, genuinely amused at his 'joke' in his exhausted state. "And then in the morning, Patton will probably insist on bringing us food in bed, and we can hang out and talk more..?"

"Sounds absolutely delightful dear" he said, slowly removing his arms from around Virgil to lay them both down just to wrap them around him as soon as the other laid down beside him. "Goodnight my dark prince. I love you." The last part was so quiet he was almost certain that the now very sleepy Virgil wouldn't have heard it as he scooted a bit closer. Feeling the other's warmth and comfort relaxing, he closed his eyes.

The echo of Roman calling him 'dear' followed Virgil into his dreams. They were much happier this time, with Roman still in them but they were both safe, both happy... Roman held him close and whispered, "I love you," and Virgil was flying...

He snuggled close as he could and slept soundly for the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So another chapter!  
> I don't really know what else to say except I'm glad so many people seem to be enjoying this, so thank you guys <3  
> Take care of yourselves -Ro


	4. Breakfast of "Champions"

Roman woke up slowly. The warmth and feeling of being completely safe tried to lure him into sleep again but as the knocks on the door started to sound more like banging, he slowly unlocked his arms from around the other, mourning the loss of the warmth for a moment before opening the door with a soft move of his hand to reveal a very worried looking Patton. "Hey Roman I can't find Virgil and I-" He stopped as he saw the darker trait peacefully in bed while making grabby hands for Roman to come back.

"Romannnn..." Virgil murmured on the brink of sleep, seeking out the warmth and comfort that had stayed with him through the night. He slowly opened his eyes and saw the prince standing at the door with Patton. "Morning, dad," he mumbled sleepily.

Patton awed softly. "Good morning, kiddo, you okay?" Virgil nodded and sat up, his hair a mess.

Roman chuckled lightly at the sight. "Isn't he adorable..." he whispered.

Patton nodded slightly and gave him a knowing look. "He sure is kiddo... Though you two together would make for the most precious thing." he winked at Roman before handing him a tray with breakfast and walking out of the room. Roman was about to slowly make his way towards Virgil as he saw the little note stuck underneath a cup of coffee. "Go get him tiger. He likes you too!" Roman blushed and hid the note in his pocket.

Virgil rubbed his eyes sleepily, hearing basically nothing Patton and Roman said because he was still so tired. "Is that coffee? I smell coffee... Oh please let me have the unicorn blood of real life...” He stretched his hands out for it. "Need to wake up..."

Roman now full on laughed and handed Virgil the cup he so desperately needed, for once happy that the other side had his eyes half closed so he wouldn't be able to see Roman's cheeks burning red. "He also brought us toast and some pancakes. Oh and I got your medicine here." He handed over the plate and sat down beside Virgil, looking at him as he took sips and slowly started waking up. He kept his eyes on the others face so he wouldn't look at the food, afraid he might puke at the thought of eating.

Virgil picked up his meds and swallowed them with another sip of coffee. "Thanks Roman," he smiled softly at him and looked down at the plate of food. "Jeez, is it just me or do these pancakes look really freaking good?" He put down his cup and glanced at Roman, noticing that the prince had made no move to eat. "...Not hungry?" he asked softly.

Roman panicked for a second. "Uh. No I ate a lot yesterday with Patton before everything happened." He could see the doubt in the other's eyes but tried to smile and shrugged at the other, getting into the bed again with a little grunt of pain. His stomach was feeling strangely empty, although he had done this days in a row before this. "You'll have to conquer these pancakes alone sweetheart." He smirked at the other, avoiding his eyes in fear of the worry he'd see there.

Virgil nodded slowly, although he was still concerned. "Alright, if you say so...” He gestured to the plate with a forkful of pancake. "Why don't you just have a piece of toast? You don't want to worry Patton, princey." If he would agree to eat even a few bites, Virgil knew he'd feel less anxious about Roman. He smiled slightly as he ate the pancakes.

Roman's stomach turned at the look of the toast. Knowing Virgil would be worried less if he ate a piece, he grabbed the slice and slowly sunk his teeth into the bread. He had to keep every ounce of his self-control to not throw up while he was chewing. After he had 'finished' chewing he hid the piece under his tongue and smiled at Virgil weakly before excusing himself to slowly make is way to the bathroom. After locking the door he spit out the piece. He couldn't do it. "My fault," he whispered.

Virgil finished his pancakes and put the tray on the bedside table. He looked the way Roman had gone and frowned slightly. Would Roman be okay to make his way there and back by himself? Maybe he should check on him. He got up and walked to the bathroom, knocking on the door. "Hey Roman? It's me."

Roman looked at the piece of food he had just spit out, realising he had probably swallowed a bit. Suddenly feeling incredibly fat, he did a thing he had promised himself not to do again... shoved his fingers down his throat. He sat in front of the toilet, puking his guts out as a knock on the door echoed through the room. Roman, too busy to hear the shout after that, only realised someone was at the door as the shouts turned into yells and somebody throwing their body against the door, trying to get in.

Virgil could hear him retching through the door and struggled to open it. It was locked. He banged harder on the door. "Roman? Roman?!" His panic increased when the only response was Roman throwing up on the other side of the door. Virgil hit the door hard with his shoulder. "Roman, I can't get in!" he yelled desperately, starting to shake slightly.

Roman had lost control over his own actions, shoving his fingers down his throat until he could only throw up fluid that still resided within his stomach. His throat and stomach and everything hurt, but his brain would not stop counting the calories he might've accidentally swallowed. Virgil was screaming his name now, but stopping was beyond his control.

Virgil slammed against the door as hard as he could and, with a cracking noise, it burst open. His heart broke as he absorbed the sight in front of him--Roman, brave, confident, gorgeously built Roman, hunched over the toilet with his fingers in the back of his throat. Virgil choked back a sob and sat next to Roman, rubbing his back. "Please..." he whispered. "Please take your hand away, Roman, please..." Virgil rubbed the spot just under his wings as tears flowed down his face. "Please... St-stop."

Roman's shaking hands grabbed onto his jacket, trying to prevent himself from throwing up what little fluid or food he had left in his stomach as Virgil rubbed his back, his wings lying flat against the floor. He probably looked pathetic, not good enough for Virgil or anybody. He cried, screamed. 'Not even able to keep him happy.' His mind hit him with every negative thought at once as his tried to focus on Virgil's touch, the comfortable warmth beside him.

Virgil bit his lip. His heart was in pieces at seeing Roman crying so desperately. "H-hey, shh, I got you..." Virgil kept rubbing his back and pulled him closer. "You t-tried to eat Ro, you tried and that's a start... Do you think you can drink some water if I bring it to you? Can you do that?" he asked very gently. "I'll help you back to the bed and get you some water?"

Roman nodded, his stomach already dropping again at the thought of having to digest anything but his mouth tasting too bad and his whole being too tired to say no as Virgil helped him up slowly. They made their way to the door, Roman slumping against the other just enough to not make him fall over. "I- c-can fly by myself, you don't have to- your arm-" Roman felt as if he had to learn how to talk again. The words laying in his mouth thick as syrup as he flapped his wings slightly.

"It's okay, Roman, I'm okay, I've got you." Virgil held him a little tighter as they walked back to the bed. "Come on, almost there," he said soothingly as he helped Roman get to the bed and sit. "I'll be right back, okay?" Virgil impulsively kissed his forehead and rushed to the kitchen, his face pink, to get the defeated-looking prince a glass of water.

Roman was so incredibly tired that it took him a minute before he realised what Virgil had just done. His face flushed pink and if it wasn't for his whole body hurting he would've squealed in joy, the ghost of a smile creeping onto Roman's face as he waited for the other to come back. Noticing the mess his room had become in those few hours. Noticing once again the mirror he had covered up so he wouldn't have to see himself. That small moment was still on his mind he slowly laid back down.

Virgil filled a cup with shaky hands. He had to put it down for a moment and clench them into fists to try and stop his tremors. After a minute of standing there and trying not to cry or shake violently, he picked the glass of water back up and walked slowly back to Roman's room. "Hey, Ro," he said quietly as he sat down on the bed next to him. "Have a couple sips, okay? At least to get the taste out of your mouth..."

Roman nodded, trying to focus on the vague feeling of Virgil's lips on his forehead instead of the water he had to drink... Water didn't have calories in it right? So it wouldn't matter it he took just a few sips, would it? He took the glass and slowly drank about a quarter of it, still not innerly sure if it had calories in it and not wanting to take the risk. Virgil's hand on his back, now rubbing in circles again, was comforting. His whole body seemed to hold onto that bit of warmth and touch.

"See? There you go, that's a start..." Virgil watched Roman set the glass down and then pulled him into a hug, being careful of his wings. Virgil was still shaking slightly from seeing the strongest person in his life broken like that, and leaned into the hug. "You don't have to tell me, Roman, but can I ask w-why? Why you did that?" he whispered against the prince's shoulder.

Roman, taking the chance to open up now that he felt numb before he could pull himself back into his shell of fake self-confidence again. "I feel like I'm not good enough, thin enough or pretty enough to be called a prince. My ideas not good enough or creative enough so I punish myself. I count the calories so I won't get more of the horrible fat that I already can't get rid of," he said in one breath and pulled his shirt up to show said fat. Oh he felt so fat.

Tears slowly fell from Virgil's eyes. "Roman..." His fingers very lightly traced the rivets between each rib and slid down the prince's slender stomach. "Oh, Roman, sweetheart, the bravest hero to ever be, there's no fat here at all. You're almost skin and bones." Virgil held him close. "Look at me, okay? Look. I don't know what you see when you look in the mirror, or step on the scale, but you aren't fat. You're not. I wouldn't lie to you, I promise." He whispered. "You're beautiful..."

Roman smiled sadly, knowing the other would not lie but not being able to believe the words he said to him as their bodies pressed against each other, his wings folding around the other protectively. "You're the kindest soul I've ever met," Roman whispered, not aware of anything but Virgil's arms surrounding him. Not wanting to be aware of anything else. He wrapped his wings around them more, hoping to hold onto him forever, though of course they had to let go eventually.

Virgil brought his hands up to cup Roman's face as the wings enveloped him. "You are so beautiful, Roman Sanders. I can tell you don't see what I see, but you are. It has nothing to do with your weight. It's your eyes, your hair, your..." Virgil bit his lip and almost leaned in to kiss him. "... You're beautiful, but now you're dangerously thin... If you don't eat you'll waste yourself away to nothing."

Roman knew it was dangerous what he was doing. He might bring Thomas himself in danger if he would keep up this behaviour but as he looked down all he saw was fat, fat pooling at the bottom of his stomach, his fat fingers and puffy face... It's funny how you can almost look exactly the same as another being yet they seem perfect to you. "Hmmm" Roman couldn't agree. Thin was a word he would strive for, but not a word he would use as he looked at himself. Thin was for pretty people. Not him.

Virgil was close to tears. He pulled Roman closer and rubbed the spot between his wings. "Your laugh, Ro... Your wings, your hands, your lips... You're beautiful and strong and you don't need to take up any less space. You're going to hurt yourself if you don't eat..." Virgil grabbed his face and whispered, "And... a-and if you were fat, you'd still be beautiful... And I'd still... I'd still love you." He closed the very small gap between them and let his lips press against Roman's.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woop woop yet another chapter yeah  
> Take care of yourselves, I feel like a parent now because so many people seem to be reading this...  
> Y'all are my children now. Eat dinner and go to bed at a reasonable time  
> -Ro


	5. Baby Steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops I'm so sorry I left on a cliffhanger for so long but I feel like a lot of you knew what would come next

Roman's eyes shot open for a moment, his thought process screeching to a stop as he felt himself slowly returning the kiss. His mind, which had been working overtime just a moment ago, was now completely peaceful, the only thought he could hold onto was how soft his lips were. How comforting his touch. And how he had craved for this moment, never doubting that the other didn't like him back but now being so gleefully surprised to discover the opposite. His hands found their way to Virgil's back.

To Virgil's complete shock, Roman didn't push him away, but kissed back and pulled him closer. He lingered in the kiss, savouring what it meant, before pulling away. "Roman..." he whispered blissfully. "I love you, I love you..." He smiled and kissed him again.

Roman felt a knot inside of his stomach he had had for such a long time that he forgot that it was there untying. Virgil loved him. He loved him. He was loved. Roman pulled the other closer, knowing they had all the time in the world but still savouring every moment of this wonderful dream he felt like he was dwelling in. But when they pulled away again, both flustered and a slight smile on their lips he knew this in fact was very very real. "I love you too Virgil." Virgil knew he meant it.

Virgil smiled sadly and pulled him closer. "Roman..." he said softly, stroking the base of his wings gently. "I love you so much, which is why it hurts me to see you like... like in the bathroom..." Virgil kissed his forehead. "Do you think that there's anything that you'd be able to just try eating, a little bit? For me?"

Roman felt slightly sick again but swallowed the feeling. "I'll try." And he would. He would not be able to eat much but he would try to improve himself for Virgil. Even if it meant he hated his image every time he faced a mirror. The other not being worried was more important. That's what he held onto as he slowly laid his head ok the others shoulder, playing with his hair while the other stroked his feathery wings gently, the feeling almost hypnotic. He quietly hummed a song long forgotten.

Virgil smiled softly and kept petting his wings. "What do you think you could eat, Ro?" he asked softly after they had been lying there together for a while. "What would be good, and easy to eat?" He wanted to stay and cuddle, but he was very anxious about Roman's wellbeing. When was the last time the prince had actually eaten something without throwing up?

Roman pursed his lips, trying to remember the foods that once were the easiest to eat and digest. "Yogurt maybe. And some fruit I suppose."  He swallowed dryly. The last time he has eaten something without purging a few hours later if he was lucky was weeks ago, maybe months. Yogurt. Yogurt would be fine. Not too many calories... Right?  He started counting in his head again but forcefully stopped himself and focused on the embrace again. Trying to convince himself it would be fine. It had to be.

Virgil nodded slightly and kissed his cheek. Roman was going to eat something, and he'd find a way to show him how handsome he was. "Yogurt and some fruit... That sounds good. Do you want me to go get it or just ask Patton to bring some? I could text him--I'd need to borrow your phone though, mine's in my room I think." He moved even closer. "Which do you think would be better?"

Roman didn't feel like answering and just gave Virgil his phone, leaning onto his shoulder and wrapping his arms around him more. "Warm" He whispered, making the other chuckle while dialing Patton's number. Roman wished he'd be able to stay there forever. Both of them wrapped up in his wings, warmth surrounding him together with the scent of dark chocolate and campfires with late night ghost stories and happiness. The word he hadn't used in a long time rolled around in his mind as Patton picked up.

"Hey, Pat? It's Virgil." He smiled softly at Roman and played with his hair. "I was wondering if you could bring us some yogurt and fruit please?" Virgil paused for a second. "Yeah, the pancakes were great, as always, we're just still a bit hungry. Thanks a lot. Uh huh. Bye." He ended the call and gave the phone back. "He'll be here in a minute," Virgil said as he snuggled as close to Roman as he could.

Roman had become sleepy by the time a soft knock sounded on the door and Patton poked his head into the room, softly awwing at the sight of them so incredibly close. "You guys made up?" He guessed. Roman smirked slightly and gave Virgil a peck on the cheek before snuggling even closer, practically sitting on his lap. Patton squealed quietly and gave them the yogurt and two spoons, not wanting to interrupt what was blossoming between the two of them, Roman's head still laying on Virgil's shoulder.

"Thanks, Patton." Virgil smiled softly at him. He waved slightly and left, shutting the door quietly behind him. Virgil pulled Roman gently so they were both sitting up and handed him a spoon. "Here you are, my prince," he said softly. "Shall we?" Virgil kissed his cheek.

Roman let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and nodded. With a slightly shaking hand he picked up the spoon and scooped some of the yogurt onto it. Little bits of fruit, mostly berries, were visible as he studied the amount he had taken onto his spoon, unconsciously realising that he was stretching the time to actually eat it. He looked at Virgil, the trait already having eaten a spoonful and now looking at him with a hint of concern glittering inside his eyes.

Virgil looked at Roman contemplating his small scoop of yogurt and bit the inside of his lip. He leaned a bit closer and brightened slightly, an idea coming to him. "Roman, my prince, would you like to play a little game?" When Roman looked at him, confused, he continued. "How this game works is for every spoon of yogurt you eat, I give you a kiss."

Roman smiled slightly, knowing he would want as many kisses as possible but it hurting just thinking about eating. "Two kisses per spoon." Virgil's smile seemed to lessen slightly but he nodded. And with a big gulp of air Roman put the first spoonful in his mouth. The yogurt tasted delicious but he felt so gross as he slowly swallowed. 10 grams. 5,58 calories. That's alright.  He'll be alright. And he looked up slowly at Virgil to see if this satisfied his need for Roman to feed himself calories.

Virgil cupped his face. "Open, baby... no cheating allowed if you want to get kisses." After Roman had showed that he swallowed the yogurt, Virgil's face lit up. He smiled brightly and kissed him twice, soft and slow. "There you go, my prince. Another spoon?" He made it more of a question than anything else, not wanting to pressure Roman into eating too much and throwing it up later.

Roman nodded, though he knew he wouldn't be able to try to throw it all back up again as soon as Virgil would leave. He swallowed another spoon with the yogurt in it. 11,16 calories. Two more kisses. Two more spoons. 22,32. He couldn't take more. His mind racing the numbers to calculate how many pushups it would take to burn the fat that would cloud his body after this meal. He took another spoon, smiling weakly at Virgil as a tear escaped from his eye and he swallowed another spoonful.

Virgil held him close and quickly wiped away the tear. "Roman, baby, you've done so well. You're doing so well eating." He kissed him. The kisses had gotten longer as Roman looked more reluctant to swallow. Virgil very slowly pulled away. "If you need to stop now, that's okay. I'm proud of you," he whispered as he leaned in for the second kiss.

Roman gladly accepted and tried to street the kiss as much as possible, tears now making their way down though he did not care about that for once. After they pulled away finally, he nodded and quietly said he was done. Virgil smiled sadly and Roman felt guilt already starting to eat away at him, knowing he should do better. For Virgil he should be better. He didn't deserve the hurt Roman made him feel at that moment. 27,90. "Sorry." His voice was barely a whisper he leaned against Virgil.

"Don't apologize, Ro... Is that more than you ate yesterday?" Roman nodded slightly. "Then I'm proud of you, I'm happy. You should be proud of yourself, too, love..." Virgil kissed away the tears that were making their way down Roman's face. "You did amazing, I love you, and you're so very strong and handsome." He held the prince close and rubbed between his wings, which seemed to help to calm him.

The feeling was therapeutic, Virgil's surprisingly warm hands gliding down his wings. Why he still had them was a mystery to him but for now he just enjoyed the comforting feeling. Trying to drown out the numbers in his mind which danced together with the thoughts like there was no tomorrow. Tried to slow time down as he leaned into the touch and closed his eyes, leaning on Virgil's shoulder. He felt Virgil humming a tune more then he heard it, the low notes making his chest rumble.

Virgil hummed soothingly and smiled as Roman started to relax. He paused in his humming once or twice to whisper, "I love you" and "so handsome, so strong..." He didn't care if Roman didn't believe him, he was going to repeat it until he did.

Roman felt himself slipping away slowly. Unconsciously wrapping his wings around both of them again and snuggling into Virgil's side again, wincing slightly as he moved what was left of his leg a bit to sit more comfortably. He wanted to stay there forever, there with Virgil. Everything felt so much better, safer. He truly believed, even if just for a moment, that he'd be fine again. Maybe not today, but in the future. As long as Virgil was at his side.

Virgil held him tightly and kissed his head, hearing his breathing get slower and even out. After a couple minutes, he leaned in and whispered, "...Roman?" He repeated that a few times, each time to no answer. When he was sure Roman was truly asleep, Virgil wrapped his arms around him and let himself cry. He cried all the tears that had been pent up since he had seen Roman bending over the toilet, all the tears he hadn't let loose because he knew if Roman saw him cry, he would feel like he had to be the strong one.

Roman woke up but didn't move as he felt Virgil rocking them both slowly and crying silent tears, most define try scared to wake him. And Roman's heart broke, knowing he had done this too this incredibly beautiful and strong person. That he had made him break like this. 'My fault. My fault my fault.' The words repeated in his head and his wrist stung like never before but still he wouldn't let Virgil know he was awake. He just pretended to move in his sleep to wrap his wings around him more.

Virgil cried quietly and held Roman tight, feeling the wings wrapping around him. Eventually his tears slowed and he sniffed, wiping his eye. "Okay, you're okay..." he whispered to himself. "Everything will be okay, Roman will... he will be okay, he will..." Virgil pressed a shaky kiss to the top of the prince's head. "I love you," he breathed, "my amazing, gorgeous prince, and I will be here for you forever. I promise."

Roman decided to break his cover and wrapped his arms around the other fully, his wings surrounding them like a cocoon he watched as Virgil tensed up before slumping into his arms again as he ran his fingers through the darker trait's hair. "I love you too. A-and Virgil.  Please, you don't have to be strong to be a hero to me." He whispered the words loud enough so the other would hear it but quiet enough to not disturb the peace that was now settling in. "It's alright to not feel okay, promise."

Virgil clung to him, shocked for a moment, and let out one last quiet sob before he softly kissed Roman. "I just don't feel like I'm strong enough to help you..." he mumbled, holding him close and relaxing at the touch to his hair. "And you deserve a hero to help you when you need it... Because you're always such a hero..."

Roman chuckled without amusement. "Oh dear I’m not. Pretending is one this but being one takes a whole different kind of personality traits." He stopped for a moment, smiling softly as Virgil urged him to continue. "You're my hero because you help me by simply being here. By doing whatever you want to do but preferring to do so in my company." He felt himself blush but did not care for once and slowly lifted his hand to wipe away the tears and cup Virgil's check.  "You're good enough Virge."

Virgil held him tightly and nodded a bit. "So are you, Ro... You're all that I want..." He slumped against the prince and sighed softly. "I love you, I love you..." He relaxed at the feel of Roman playing with his hair and the safety that seemed to come with being enveloped in his wings. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, this chapter actually didn't end up being the angstiest. Sure, it was sad, but there was cute and cuddles. Maybe things will get better from here...  
> >:)  
> -Ro


	6. Back Downhill

He didn't know how long they had been sitting there. Time passed by quickly but also comfortably slow and they were both still wrapped in each other’s arms and Virgil in his wings as Patton walked in to tell them dinner was ready. Nothing unusual of course and Patton awed softly again, but the scream that followed as he saw what was underneath Virgil's now rolled up sleeves was enough to make the both of them almost fall off of the bed. Roman was startled but Virgil seeming to realise what was going on.

Virgil peeled himself away from Roman and stood up next to Patton, wrapping his arms around him. "I haven't in... a while, and I'm not going to, never again," he whispered to the dad figure, who was now holding him tightly. "Promise, Dad, I won't ever do it again." Virgil almost laughed to himself. Two days ago, this was probably his biggest secret, buried under excuses and long-sleeved layers... and now everyone knew, and he didn't really care.

Roman sat on the edge of the bed and reached out his arms like a child would if they wanted to be picked up, Inviting Patton in for a hug too. Patton accepted and the three of them sat in silence for a while, Roman and Virgil both trying to comfort Patton as much as they could as the fatherly trait slowly started tearing up, the realisation dawning on him as he clung to the both of them. Roman's slightly gritting his teeth as his arms were pressed against the others but hiding the pain carefully.

After a very long moment in which all three hugged each other tightly and all tried to comfort each other, someone pulled away. Virgil tugged his sleeves back down and tried to discreetly wipe away his tears.

"U-um..." Patton cleared his throat slightly. "I came to let you two know that dinner's ready, and I was wondering if you wanted to come to the table or stay here?"

Virgil looked at Roman. "I can go, but if Roman's staying I'll stay with him." He held the prince's hand. "What's for dinner?"

"Pasta." Patton said, now looking worried at Roman while the other wrapped his wings around himself slightly.

"I- I'll join."  Roman said, regretting his choice instantly as he saw Virgil's eyes lit up. Knowing he would not be able to keep the food inside of his body as soon as Virgil would leave him alone for more than three minutes. But he still nodded and walked with them to the kitchen table.

Virgil held around his waist to support him. "Ro, if you need to stop eating, don't force yourself to eat more, okay?" he murmured in his ear. "It's better to just eat a little and keep it down." Virgil kissed his cheek and sat next to him at the table, across from Logan.

"Good to see you two up and moving about," he said in form of greetings.

Roman tried to recover his normal price like posture and send a smile towards Logan and let Patton lay the pasta on his plate, only realising his mistake as he saw the giant pile of food that he had dropped on the little stone plate. Roman swallowed dryly and smiled at Patton weakly. "Thanks Pat." He felt like vomiting but still picked up his fork and nodded at Virgil silently. He wouldn't worry Patton and what came afterwards... Well.  He'd be able to deal with that.

Virgil nodded back at him, barely noticing how much Patton served him, just looking at Roman. He rested his hand on the remainder of the prince's leg and rubbed his thumb in small circles, hoping it wasn't hurting him. "...Thanks, Patton," he said absentmindedly, picking up his fork and turning to his plate. He started eating quietly, keeping an eye on Roman.

Roman swallowed a bite. Alright, pasta, he looked at his plate and guessed the weight. 154.8 calories. Sauce, 28,7 calories. He picked up his fork again taking another bite, biting back the tears of frustration. He would get fat, so so fat. Another bite. He finished about three quarters of the plate before he stopped. He felt heavy, practically feeling the fat forming as he excused himself to the toilet.

Virgil almost started crying when Roman excused himself. He looked down at his plate and his grip tightened on his fork until his skin turned white. He knew he couldn’t expect Roman to get better immediately, just because Virgil asked him, but it didn't hurt any less knowing what he was about to--

“What’s wrong kiddo?”

Virgil blinked and realized a small pool of tears had fallen into his pasta. “E-excuse me,” he choked out, running to the bathroom and curling up outside the door.

Roman clutched the toilet he had just thrown up in whole heavily shaking. He couldn't. He wouldn’t... he sobbed silently, knowing he had failed Virgil. He wanted him to get better, and Roman knew this wasn’t healthy. Blackouts in the middle of the hallway and being happy to see that your ribs had become even more visible isn’t healthy. But it had become an addiction, and he would not be able to stop. Not now. Not yet. Not--he fell silent just to hear another person outside the door.

Virgil took a deep, shuddering breath and wiped his eyes. He stood up and knocked softly on the door. “R-roman, baby? It’s me... can I come in?” He leaned against the door as he waited for an answer.

Roman’s wings pressed themselves flat against his body. He didn’t want Virgil to see him like this again. Not again. Not ever. “I-I’ll be fine Virge. J-just go eat the rest of your foo--” he repressed the urge to throw up at the word, at the realization that he would never be able to get rid of all the food he had consumed. “It’ll be alright Virge. Just--I’m sorry. So, so sorry.” And after a moment, “it’s all my fault.”

“I won’t come in if you don’t want me to, but I’m staying here until you come out, okay? Don’t apologize, love...” Virgil slid down until he was sitting, leaning against the bathroom door. “Don’t apologize. You tried, I know you did. You did so well when you ate the yogurt, and I could see that you tried with the pasta. I’m proud of you for trying, baby.”

“My fault.” Roman heard Virgil’s voice like it was a breath of air, not loud enough to understand the words or drown out the thoughts. “My fault.” His wrist was stinging badly, but it was not enough. “My fault.” He slowly got up and looked at the cabinet. “My fault.” And then his eyes went dark. “Razor.”

“No, baby, it isn’t, please stop saying th--” Virgil gasped and became suddenly alert. “No! Roman, don’t!” He scrambled to his feel and burst through the door, tear tracks still visible on his face. “Look at me, baby.” Virgil spun Roman around and cupped his face, leaning so close he could feel his breath. “Roman, would you blame yourself if you had cancer?”

Roman dropped the razor that was already lightly pressing onto his wrist as Virgil flung towards him. “I--no,” he whispered.

“Then don’t blame yourself. You’re just sick and I’m going to help you get better, okay?”

Roman’s eyes were filled with tears that had already started making their way down and his throat was sore from puking. ‘But it’s not the same. You started this yourself.’ His mind was arguing with Virgil itself as he tried to stop himself from shaking so much.

Virgil brushed tears from his face and kissed his nose very softly. “Now here’s the plan: you’ll go to the bedroom and drink some water, and I’ll tell Patton and Logan that you aren’t feeling well. I’ll come back and we can cuddle. Does that sound good, my love?”

Roman nodded again, not trusting his voice to be able to speak without cracking as he slowly made his way to the bedroom, giving Patton and Logan a weak smile as he passed the kitchen. He tried to keep his balance by leaning against the wall and hopping further, his body too tired to even try to fly, almost too tired to even lift his limbs anymore as he finally reached the door to his room. Instead of trying to reach the bed and risking the chance of falling over, he just slid down the door.

Virgil went to the table and put away his and Roman’s dishes. “Roman isn’t feeling well, so he’s going to lie down. I think I’ll go keep him company.” Patton nodded in agreement, but looked worried.

Virgil went to Roman’s bedroom and helped him the rest of the was to the bed before handing him his water. “Drink some, dear, and then we’ll cuddle, okay?” He softly kissed the prince’s cheek.

Roman nodded and took a sip from the glass, trying not to spill because of his shaking hands. He closed his eyes, feeling himself calming down slowly. He had opened his eyes to tell Virgil he was alright, but was interrupted by a loud bang as the door was kicked in and a crying Patton walked in.

“You threw up on purpose, didn’t you? L-logan said you did.” He sniffed and stood in the doorway, a heartbreaking image. “I-it’s my fault...” Patton whispered, and Roman hissed in pain as his wrist stung.

Virgil turned to Patton and shook his head. “No, dad, it’s not your fault.” His voice was surprisingly steady despite the tears snaking down his cheeks. “Roman...” Virgil glanced at him for permission to tell Patton. At the prince’s slight nod, he continued. “Roman’s been struggling with this for... too long. It’s not your fault, it’s nobody’s fault.” Virgil took Roman’s hands and squeezed them gently. “Just like how we don’t blame ourselves for being sick.”

Roman smiled softly at Virgil’s words, but the pain in his chest grew to an unhealthy extent as he watched how Patton stood leaning against the door frame, still crying even harder at the thought of Roman having kept this secret for so long. As Logan walked up behind him, he took one glance and then wrapped his arms around the other, shushing him lightly as he let himself slump in Logan’s arms. 

And it hurt. He had hurt all of them and it was his fault. His fault his fault his--he blacked out.

“Roman?” Virgil sat down next to Roman, concern growing.

“I-I think he’s passed out...” He vaguely heard Logan talk about calories and stamina and some other stuff.

“Mhm,” he said, looking up. “Patton, it might be a good idea to make Roman lighter foods--things he can eat easier, yeah?” Patton sniffed and nodded. “Okay. He’s going to be okay, it’ll be okay.” Virgil pushed Roman’s hair out of his eyes and took a deep breath. “Why don’t you two go clean up from dinner? I’ll keep an eye on Roman.” 

***

Roman had absolutely no idea what had happened. The only thing he could be fully aware of was the stinging pain in both his stomach and wrist. Used to his stomach hurting, he focused on his wrist, realizing the words had now been carved into his wrist again, blood leaking from the black letters as the pain slowly increased. He looked at it in fascination, not able to move nor tear his eyes away from the blood that was slowly starting to paint his hand red as it leaked down. My fault.

Virgil rushed back into the room, having left for first aid supplies as soon as he noticed the bleeding. He knelt on the floor next to the bed and took Roman’s hand. He kissed above the wound and whispered, “I’m sorry about this part,” before starting to clean the cuts on his wrist. Roman winced in pain but let him, though it was no use. The blood kept flowing. No matter what they did, the bandages got soaked and Roman began to feel weaker and weaker. 

“Virge, I can’t--” He wasn’t even able to form proper sentences as he watched how the other tried to stop the endless flow of red. The endless trail of blood that seemed to turn into a river. Tears dripped from Virgil’s eyes. “...My fault,” he whispered almost inaudibly, and the blood flow increased.

Virgil’s head snapped up. “W-what did you say?” He climbed onto the bed, tears streaming down his face. He had no idea if this would help at all, but damn it would he try. “Roman, look at me, love,” he whispered, cupping his face. “I want you to repeat after me: it’s not my fault. Say it, baby... It’s not my fault.”

Roman was in some sort of trance, not realizing his strength was getting weaker as the puddle increased. “N-no.” Virgil looked shocked. “It’s my fault. My fault. My fault.” Roman repeated the mantra as if he were summoning some sort of devil, and Roman started to think that that was exactly what he was doing as the puddle kept growing.

Virgil shook his head and pressed his forehead against Roman’s. “It’s not,” he whispered desperately. “Not your fault, it’s not, not your fault... Roman, baby, please... for me. Just say it once, please, please. It’s not your fault. Say it. Please say it.” He couldn’t stop shaking. He knew Roman wasn’t going to die, but what if the blood kept flowing and he passed out and just didn’t wake up? “Please! Not your fault, not your fault.”

Roman was vaguely aware of the fact that Virgil was shaking violently, wanting to help him but not knowing how. It felt as if he had forgotten how to move properly, how to breathe properly. His eyes rolled up a few times, on the brink of passing out completely as he slumped against Virgil, who clutched him tightly. “Sorry. My fault.” And Roman was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well quantumducky was right not to trust me...  
> Also sorry about the wait, I was busy  
> Take care of yourselves, kids -Ro


	7. Holding Each Other Together

Virgil screamed his name desperately, but Roman had stopped answering, stopped moving, he clung to him and cried hysterically, yelling his name as if maybe if he said it loud enough, he could wake Roman up. Virgil was shaking so much he could barely move a hand to cling to the prince’s sash. He whispered constantly, half-hoping that it would somehow help, “not your fault, not your fault, not your fault...” 

Patton walked in to check on the both of them when his heart stopped. Blood. A giant puddle of blood impossible to be from one person... with that person surviving... snake across the floor, slowly trickling towards him. And he screamed. Screamed as he saw Roman, his left hand painted red from the blood that was trickling down from it.

Virgil didn’t notice the door open, or Patton’s scream at all the blood. He barely noticed the tears on his own face. He just held Roman tightly, pressing himself closer when he couldn’t hear any breath coming from him. Virgil was breathing enough for both of them, almost hyperventilating in his panic. He rested his head against Roman’s chest, desperate to hear his heartbeat, that he was still there in any way, and saw Patton through his tears. “...Help,” he whispered helplessly.

Patton rushed over now. He pushed Virgil to the side gently so he could listen on Roman’s chest, so he could feel his pulse in his wrist, his neck, anywhere. Patton’s vision became more blurry with tears as he could not find a pulse, a heartbeat--but they could not die. Why wasn’t he--

“He’s out cold. A sort of coma.”

His head whipped around to Logan, the normally so collected man now messy with tears streaming down his face. “I don’t know how to help him,” he whispered.

Virgil held him tightly and sobbed. He curled up as close to Roman as he could and rested one hand on his face. He looked like he was just asleep if you didn’t see the blood.

“Virgil, it... it probably isn’t a good idea for you to stay here. Come on, we’ll--” Virgil shook his head without letting Logan finish his sentence.

“I’m staying,” he whispered. “I’m staying with Roman until he wakes up, he shouldn’t wake up alone.”

Logan wiped his eyes. “Virgil, we don’t know if he--”

“I’m staying!”

“Virgil!” Logan shouted now, making the darker trait flinch and finally look up. “It’s not healthy to stay here.” His voice was softer now, not even bothering to wipe the tears away anymore as he walked towards the three of them. “I have to see how to stop the--the bleeding and then you’ll be able to stay with him. We’ll also make a schedule so none of us have to stay awake for too long.” He grabbed both of their shoulders softly and pushed them away from Roman slightly. “I know it hurts b-but please.”

Virgil was about to protest when he saw their faces, really saw them. Saw the tear tracks and the despair and felt like an idiot for not realizing that they were hurting, too, as much as he was. He nodded slightly. “O-okay. You... you help him and I’ll go with Patton to get some rest.”

Virgil took the father figure’s hand and walked out of Roman’s room. Not feeling like either of their rooms’ affects would help the situation, they curled up on the couch together and whispered words of comfort through tears.

Logan let out a strangled sob he did not know he was holding back. Of course he had emotions, and though the man in front of him had doubted this many times, he still felt like a brother. A friend. Family. Logan slowly tried to stop the bleeding, finally finding a way to do so through shutting off the bloodstream that would normally go into his arm. If it was left this was for too long, it would go limp, turn black, and may need to be removed due to the lack of blood, but he simply did not know what else to do.

Virgil curled up in Patton’s arms, shaking but still trying to comfort the other, as desperately as he needed reassurance himself. “Logan... L-logan is real smart... he’ll figure something out, yeah?” Virgil hugged him tightly and whispered, “He’ll be okay, Roman will be okay...” He repeated it under his breath, over and over, as if saying the words would somehow make it true. ‘It’ll be okay,’ he thought, then forced another thought, although he wasn’t sure he believed it. ‘Not my fault...”

Logan was done. He had done everything he could. The bleeding had stopped and the blood was gone, the room was cleaned and his face was dried. As he slowly made his way out of the room, one last look at Roman, he felt tears stinging behind his eyelids again. But he would not let them fall. Not now. He had to be strong for the others. As he checked in on them they were still cuddling up to each other, Virgil practically laying in Patton’s lap, both of them shaking. Virgil looked up and saw Logan with tears in his eyes. He held out his arm to invite the other side to sit with them, and Logan collapsed on the couch and leaned against them. They all stayed there for a while. Everyone was trying to hold together for the others as well as hold the others together. 

After time had passed--Virgil couldn’t say if it was seconds or hours--Virgil whispered, “...how is he?”

“I--the bleeding stopped. I had to block the blood from going through his arm entirely to make it happen, though... meaning his arm might not be fully functional if he--o-once he wakes up.” Patton was rubbing his back lightly and Virgil had his arm around Logan. The very first time, but definitely not the last time, that they would have to comfort the normally so emotionless side.

“He’ll be okay, let’s just focus on the good,” Patton said softly. “You got the bleeding to stop, which means he’ll recover quicker. Thank you so much, Logan.”

Virgil nodded and wiped his eyes. “You’re the best. He’s gonna be okay, and if he needs help, he has us.” Virgil took a deep breath, repeating his inner loop of ‘it’ll be okay, not my fault...’

Logan was at war with himself. He had done well. He had done everything he could... right? A small voice in his mind that doubted his every move seemed to be louder than usual.

_ He already lost his leg because of you. Now he’s losing his arm. It’s all your fault. Your fault. _

_ My fault. _

_ My fault. _

“My fault,” Logan whispered the words, a tear slipping from underneath his closed eyelids.

“No, no no no don’t say that.” Virgil gripped Logan’s hands tightly, looking him in the eye. “It’s not your fault. You’re doing absolutely everything you can to help him, all of us are doing our best. It’s nobody’s fault. Not yours, or Patton’s, or mine. Certainly not Roman’s. Nobody’s fault. And we’ll kick nobody’s ass as soon as Roman is better, won’t we?” Virgil tried to smile as tears streaked down his face.

Logan nodded, feeling the tears still on his face, but a smile tugging at his lips. “I’ll try. Thank you, Virgil, sometimes I lose track of... myself I suppose.” He smiled sadly, his arms loosely wrapping around the both of them.

Virgil nodded and leaned closer to Logan and Patton. Eventually he noticed that he had stopped shaking and Patton’s tears had almost stopped. Virgil looked up at Logan and bit his lip. “...D’you think I could go see him now?” he whispered. 

Logan nodde slightly and stood up. “Patton and I shall be waiting in front of the door so that he can visit him afterwards... though if you’d rather not be alone with him, it’s understandable.”

Virgil got up and nodded back, walking towards Roman’s room with Patton beside him. The dad trait had a hand on Virgil’s back and rubbed softly. When they got there, Virgil smiled weakly at them and went in, closing the door behind him.

“Do you think he’ll be alright?” 

Logan turned to look at Patton, uncertainty clear in the fatherly trait’s eyes. “I hope he will, and Patton dear, we’ll be right outside,” Logan said softly, wrapping his arm around the other’s shoulder to pull him closer, his head now resting on top of Patton’s.

Virgil very slowly walked over to the bed, sitting next to Roman. He looked like he might have a little more colour in his face, Virgil thought as he looked, moving closer and gently taking Roman’s good hand. “I love you,” he whispered. “And you’re going to be okay. I just know it.” Roman  _ was  _ going to be okay, because he had to be...

Logan waited in front of the door, now sitting down beside it so he could comfort Patton better, the other crying silently as Logan ran his hands through Patton’s soft hair, the strands feeling like satin between his fingers as he whispered comforting words. 

They had been sitting there for about half an hour when the door slowly opened. Virgil forced a small smile and sat down against the wall. “Go ahead, Pat...” he said quietly, waiting for him to be through the door before he started crying again.

Logan had no clue why or how it had happened but he had taken on the role of caretaker for both of them, hugging Virgil close as he sobbed into his shoulder. It felt different to comforting Patton, more of a... platonic need to protect him, he supposed. “It’s alright, he’ll be alright... He has to be.” Logan did not know for sure, but he was hoping. And hoping is what he would keep doing until they knew how to fix this.

Virgil curled up against him and let himself just cry. If he closed his eyes, he could almost imagine he was being held by Roman... but it was still different, of course it was. Roman smelled warm and like cinnamon and held him like he was something precious. Virgil cried harder, feeling his anxieties start to well up. What if Roman didn’t wake up? What if he did, but he hated Virgil? What if he didn’t remember why he loved him? What if Logan was getting annoyed from Virgil crying against him for so long?

Logan’s heart broke with every body-wracking sob of the darker trait, now holding him as if he was keeping Virgil safe from the rain, thunder, gunfire... anything he could do he would have done at that very moment, just to make sure the crying stopped. To make sure he would no longer feel sad. If Logan were capable, he would take away every single piece of sadness and put it away, burn it or hide it within his own body just to see the other drying his tears instead of sobbing.

Virgil’s tears started to run dry after a while. He just leaned against Logan and took deep, shuddering breaths, trying to regain some semblance of calm. Slowly looking up at the logical side and sniffing pitifully, it was remarkable how small he seemed, how much like a child. “Logan...” he whispered. “I-is he really going to be okay?”

“I’m not certain how long he’ll be in this state, if I am honest.” His hands rubbed small circles onto Virgil’s arm. “But he won’t disappear or die. We’re not capable of doing so.” He knew this might send more tears to form in Virgil’s eyes, but it was the best thing he thought he could do. Facts. And it would be alright--maybe not soon, but it would. As he felt tears forming in his own eyes, Logan hugged Virgil close, hiding the tears and trying  to to wipe them away without the other noticing.

He did, and wiped them away himself. “You don’t have to pretend you’re okay if you’re not,” he whispered. “Patton tells me that you’re like a bottle of pop--if you don’t let some pressure out when you need to, you’re gonna explode.” Virgil smiled weakly. “He also said not to feel bad about crying, it’s your soul’s way of getting out something that doesn’t belong... like your soul sneezing.”

Logan smiled and sniffed a bit before realizing how the person he had wanted to comfort had just done the same for himself. “Those--those are wise words for such an innocent side... though I suppose there is much I do not know about all of you,” he said. Saddened by his realization, he laid his head on the other’s shoulder.

“Well there’s lots I’m sure I don’t know about you,” Virgil said, hugging him. “And I’ve had lots of interactions with Patton in ways that you probably haven’t...” He took a breath and wiped his eyes. “I go to his room when I have nightmares,” he admitted. “Which is... a-a lot. That was when he told me the sneezing thing actually, and I started crying and laughing at the same time.” Virgil chuckled softly.

“That’s wonderful. And, though I do understand if it’s more to your liking to go to Patton while facing nightmares, feel free to come to me whenever he is not available, or if you just feel like it.”

He smiled at the other and pulled him into a tight hug again, before pulling away as the door slowly opened and Patton walked out. Virgil held out his arm and silently invited Patton into the hug, which he joined almost immediately. After a minute of hugging, Virgil looked at Logan. “Do you want to see him?” he asked softly. “I know you were in there, but... do you want to see him as his friend, instead of a... doctor?” That wasn’t quite the right word, but Virgil couldn’t think of what he meant, and Logan seemed to understand.

He nodded slowly and waited for the both of them to get up from his lap before he stood as well. “Maybe we should all go in, being alone in there can be... scary.” He looked at Patton who, despite not being in Virgil’s room, had a reasonable amount of eyeshadow underneath his eyes, which smudged as he wiped away tears. 

“Let’s go,” Patton said softly and grabbed both of their hands while stepping through the door, feeling that the both of them needed comfort but knowing it would help him too.

Virgil squeezed his hand slightly and followed them back in. He had noticed the eyeshadow on Patton and stayed closer to him. He wanted to help Patton feel better, since the dad had helped him so many times. Virgil slowly let go and instead wrapped his arm around Patton. “You okay, dad?” he whispered quietly.

Logan saw Patton nod slightly, though his trembling hand and a tad bit too strong grip told a different story. He nodded with his head and three chairs appeared next to Roman’s bed, though only he and Patton took place on them. Virgil simply sat on the bed, looking at Roman as if searching for any kind of movement. 

“Alright,” Logan said quietly. “So we do not know how long he’ll be... in this state, but we should take care of him as best we can. As I don’t think he’s active in the mind center right now, we’ll have issues with videos coming up.”

Virgil nodded. After a moment, he spoke, grabbing Roman’s hand. “I think probably we could suggest to Thomas to make a video where we explain what happened with Roman. Then people might be more understanding if Thomas is less active for a while. But I think there are definitely things we’d have to leave out, because we obviously shouldn’t talk about Roman’s personal issues without his permission.”

Patton looked at him. “That... is a great idea, kiddo.” He smiled slightly.

Logan nodded, but then something popped into his head. “I’m sorry Virge, but that won’t be able to happen. Most of the fans still believe in us all being just characters. Maybe we should announce a break or something similar so we can make sure that he wakes up. And if not... We’ll see about that.” Logan looked at Virgil, hoping he wouldn’t take it as an insult that he shot his idea down.

Virgil shrugged and nodded. “Yeah, you’re probably right...” He fought back his rising anxiety by saying “most of Thomas’s fans are always telling him to get rest and take care of himself, so they’ll probably all encourage him if he announces a break.” He looked at Roman, moving a bit closer. He couldn’t look away from the face that was currently so comforting and simultaneously saddening.

Logan nodded and shuddered as guilt rushed through him as he saw how Virgil’s eyeshadow got the slightest but darker. He moved his chair closer to Patton to put his arm around him. “Hopefully we’ll only be gone for a few weeks. We do not want to let the fans wait for too long.” He rubbed small circles into Patton’s back as they all looked at Roman in silence, his arm already starting to go a bit purple from lack of blood. If it wasn’t for that, him being unnaturally cold and the slightly paler skin, he could have been asleep.

Virgil looked down at the words etched on Roman’s wrist. “Is it... is it just me, or does that look a little better?” he asked hopefully, looking at the other two.

Logan looked at the words, seeing how they were slightly more translucent instead of the deep, inky blackness they had been before. “...It is, I believe,” he said after a little while. “He’ll get better, Virgil. It might take a while for him to recover, but he will.”  He saw Patton nodding his head beside him, and just hoped it was true.

Virgil looked closer. He was desperately hoping that the wound would heal enough to return circulation to his arm soon. He laid down almost on top of Roman and buried his face against his neck. Despite being cold and extremely still, he still smelled comforting...

Logan smiled sadly, watching the scene and wrapping his arm around Patton to pull him closer. He didn’t realize he had until the fatherly trait laid his head onto his shoulder after giving him a small kiss on the cheek. Logan blushed lightly and laid his head on top of the other’s, blinking away the tears as he looked at Virgil. The man looked broken but so incredibly peaceful. Virgil clung to the prince and took a deep breath. He felt exhausted after everything that had happened, and he curled up and fell asleep cuddling close to Roman. Patton held Logan even tighter and sighed softly, wiping his eyes. He didn’t feel like he’d be able to sleep at all that night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEEEE CHOO CHOO THE ANGST TRAIN IS STILL GOING STRONG  
> Seriously though I cried during the rp when we did this part  
> Eat something kids and get to sleep at a normal hour (I say as I write this at 5:30 am)  
> -Ro


	8. Waiting

“...Make sure that you all are taking care of yourselves because that’s really important. It’s always good. Any progress is progress...”

They all watched as Thomas made the small video, sighing as soon as it was done and looking at them all with a worried expression. They had all agreed to take Roman with them to show Thomas how truly serious it was. However, they had not realized Thomas had yet to see his missing leg, purpling arm, and the giant bandage Virgil still had on his own upper arm and shoulder. Thomas had screamed.

Virgil was sitting with Roman as Thomas filmed, quiet, as he had taken to being. He had been spending almost all of his time in the company of the unconscious prince, although he left whenever Logan wanted to check on his leg. Virgil was holding the prince’s hand at the moment, and had taken to periodically checking Roman’s wrist. He wanted to tell Logan as soon as it looked healed enough to unblock his blood flow.

Logan had made Thomas call Joan to explain the situation, them understanding, being the incredible friend they were. Joan told him that they would work on the schedule he promised to make. 

Logan was also checking on Roman’s leg every other day, glad to see the wound was healing quickly. In a few months he would be able to wear the prosthetic Logan had already started to design. 

And Virgil, well... 

The side would only leave Roman to either wait until Logan was finished or maybe eat something, often falling asleep curled up with or on top of the prince. Logan hoped that Roman would recover soon for his sake, and for Virgil’s.

***

Virgil looked down and rubbed his thumb very gently over Roman’s wrist. “Logan!” he called, his face brightening slightly. When the logical side had come in and could see his wrist, Virgil pointed to it. “It’s almost a scab at this point. Do you think this means we can bandage it and unblock his arm?” he asked, his voice hopeful.

Logan thought for a while. They could try it at least, if the blood started to flow again he’d just put the pressure back on. So he nodded, smiling at Virgil as his eyes lit up. And slowly, very slowly, he removed the band around his arm which had blocked off the bloodstream.

They waited. And waited. The red band where the pressure had been slowly faded and the purple looked a bit less pronounced--and no blood was flowing. Logan looked up at Virgil, a spark of hope slowly lighting up inside of him.

Virgil gasped softly and looked at Logan. “His arm is going less purple and he isn’t bleeding, does this... does this mean he might wake up soon?” Virgil asked in a hushed tone, as if saying it too loud would jinx it. He was almost smiling, a light in his eyes that hadn’t quite been there since Roman went into his comatose state.

Logan nodded. “Though we cannot be certain, and if he does he’ll be weak, so we’ll have to take care of him. Let him eat something first--something light as we still have the problem of him eating way too little,” he said, looking at the prince. His cheekbones were almost cutting through his skin like paper and his wrists looked way too thin. “I’ll check on the both of you in a few hours, Patton needs some care too at the moment.” His voice sounded sad as he smiled, the spark of hope fading slightly.

Virgil nodded, and once Logan had left, started talking in a whisper. “Hear that, baby? You’re getting better, and you might wake up soon. I’ll take real good care of you when you do, okay? I’ll help you and soon you’ll be going on adventures again.” He leaned down and kissed Roman’s forehead. “Soon I’ll be able to give you a kiss and you’ll kiss back...”

Logan closed the door behind himself, his shoulders slumping as he made his way to Patton’s room. The fatherly trait had not been doing well since Roman had gone cold. Logan shivered as images of the day before flashed before his eyes again. Patton had been in the bathroom when Logan walked in, and as painful as the thought was, he was glad that he had. The cut on Patton’s wrist was now wrapped up in a bandage, covered by the cat hoodie that he had taken to wearing every day. It hurt, Logan knew that. It hurt him too. But hurting yourself more was not the answer here. 

Patton was curled up on his bed, reading a picture book. Well, he was looking at the pictures and trying to focus on the story instead of anything else. He looked up when Logan came in and put the book down, laying it flat against the bed. “Oh, hi Lo,” he said, barely smiling at his little pun. “How are you doing? What’s knew?”

He faked a smile as he looked back, sitting on the edge of Patton’s bed. “We have some good news... Roman’s arm has gotten better. His wound has scabbed over completely, and although he is still comatose, the band on his arm was successfully removed without any blood flow.”

Patton gasped and threw his arms around Logan. “That’s great! Do you know when he’ll wake up?”

“I’m afraid I do not,” he whispered, and Patton wilted noticeably. “But it is a big step in the right direction. Hopefully he will be conscious sometime in the near future... but I truly cannot say.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guess who's back? I'm sorry for the long wait but guess who graduated and has a job? ...Jeez, I'm old  
> Ren says eat some food and go to bed at a reasonable time  
> -Ro


	9. A Quiet Day

Logan knocked softly on the door to Roman’s room and stepped in, faking a small smile. “Just checked on Patton, he’s asleep luckily. So how is Roman’s state of being?” he said quickly, avoiding Virgil’s eyes, afraid he’d see the worry.

“He’s still not awake, but I think he looks a bit better.” Virgil patted his shoulder. “Are you doing alright? You’ve been spending a lot of time supporting all of us... how are you?” he asked gently.

Logan felt a strong pull at his heart, feeling the urge to let it go, to just rip off the mask and let it all out. But he did not do so, feeling they needed someone more than he did. “I’m alright Virgil, though I think the three of you are more important to worry about at this moment. How is your wound doing?” he asked, gently taking the bandaged arm and carefully keeping his eyes focused there to avoid eye contact.

Virgil could tell that Logan felt he needed to be strong, but didn’t know how to help him open up. He lifted his injured arm all the way up over his head. “I can do this without it hurting at all now,” he said. “Thanks to you, Logan.” Virgil let his arm drop and thought for a moment. “Hey... I’m not sure when I last ate, are you? Let’s get some food,” he suggested.

Logan nodded, smiling at Virgil as he rebandaged his arm quickly, glad to see how quickly Virgil’s arm was recovering. He stood up, waiting for the other to stand and walk in front of him. 

Virgil smiled at the logical side before he walked into the kitchen and looked around. “What do you want to eat, Logan?” he asked, pulling his hoodie back on. “I don’t really care... oh, and do you know when Patton last ate?”

Logan’s throat felt dry. “Last night.” Patton hadn’t eaten in days after Roman’s incident, and only when Logan practically forced him to after the bathroom incident. “...He’s asleep now, I think.” Logan felt awkward,out of place in the presence of the other. Wrong almost. Though he felt that he hid it well. “Make whatever you like.”

“I’m cooking? You know I’m basically a college student, right?” Virgil laughed softly and started making boxed macaroni. “High anxiety levels, lots of regrettably late nights, and lots of ramen and KD.” He started humming softly as he stirred the pasta into the water--something he hadn’t done since Roman’s incident.

Logan looked on from his spot by the counter as Virgil prepared the simple meal, seeming almost at peace as he hummed a song they had all forgotten the name of.they sat there in the almost silence for a few moments, enjoying the peace that had fallen over the kitchen before Logan slowly got up, saying something about how he would go to see if Patton wanted to eat something too. He made his way down the hall to the blue door, covered in old stickers and with a name tag, reading Patton’s name in childlike lettering.

Patton was sitting curled up on his bed, wrapped in a soft blanket. His eyes were red and he rubbed them again with one hand as he drew a picture. When he heard the quiet knock on the door, he quickly hid the paper from sight. “Yeah?” he said, trying not to let his voice tremble.

Logan slowly opened the door. He could see the paper sticking out slightly from under a pillow, but decided to ignore it for the time being. He walked in, asking Patton if he was alright. “Can I see?” he asked, pointing to Patton’s wrist.

Patton shrugged slightly and tugged up the sleeve of his hoodie to show Logan his healing cuts. “I... I’m doing okay, I guess,” he said in response to Logan’s question. “How about Virgil?”

“Virgil is doing alright, though try to focus more on yourself for now.” He paused for a moment before laying his hand on the pillow. “Can I see what you were making, dear?” It felt odd to him to use the nicknames Patton seemed to enjoy, but he was warming up to them, and the reactions he would get.

Patton blushed and smiled softly at the endearment. “...Okay...” He pulled the picture out from under the pillow, revealing a mostly done crayon drawing of him, Logan, and Virgil on a couch. There was a little heart floating above them. “It’s... it’s after you helped Roman. Because it was sad, but it was kind of happy, too,” he explained shyly.

Logan smiled softly and took Patton’s hands in his, feeling how warm they were. “It’s absolutely wonderful, dear.” And he meant it. His cheek tinted pink as he repressed the urge to attack the other into a hug, knowing he’d either reject it or be baffled.

“Awe, thanks Logan.” Patton smiled a little more and looked down, blushing.

Virgil walked in. “Alright, it’s ready. Come on, it’s--” he quickly glanced at his phone. “--lunchtime. Hey Patton, cool drawing.” The moral side smiled and put the paper and his art supplies on the side table.

Logan got up slowly and held a hand out to Patton. He tried not to act different while at the same time attempting to hide his slight blush as the other took his hand so Logan could help him up from the bed. They followed Virgil out of the room, Logan noticing how their hands were still loosely locked together. “We were having macaroni, and as you yourself needed to eat again, we thought you could join us,” he said, keeping his red face carefully hidden from the fatherly trait.

Patton nodded, feeling comfortable with their hands linked and deciding to let Logan be the first to pull away. “Thanks for thinking of me, you two,” he said with a smile and a gentle squeeze of Logan’s hand. Virgil hid a smile at the two of them and passed them both bowls of macaroni before getting his own and taking it to the table.

Logan smiled at the two of them, realizing he had done so a lot over the last couple of weeks. Showing emotions in general seemed to have become more normal for him. He looked at the other two, waiting for Patton to finally take a bite before he himself started eating, knowing how easily the other had developed a bad habit of not eating if he wasn’t urged to do so. 

The kitchen was quiet from then on, the only noises being the forks and spoons slightly scraping against bowls and the quiet compliment Patton gave on the food. Virgil smiled softly and nodded in thanks instead of making a comment on how difficult it was to mess up macaroni from a box. 

He quickly finished his bowl and put his dishes in the sink. “I think I’m going to go back to Roman’s room,” he said quietly, playing with his sleeves and grinning a bit wider. “I want to be there when he wakes up.” Virgil rushed back to Roman’s room, leaving the other two together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whee and Ro is back on the editing train so the next few chapters might actually be a bit more consistently uploaded!  
> ...Maybe, no promises  
> Love you all, make good choices


	10. Peace of Mind and Gentle Heart

After Virgil waved slightly and went off to the bedroom, Patton turned to Logan. “How is Roman doing?” he asked softly, stirring his pasta around a bit before taking another bite.

Logan noted how he had eaten more already than he had yesterday and cheered up a little. “He’s doing a lot better than when we found him. The words on his wrist are almost gone and he seems to have a bit more colour in his cheeks,” he stated, seeing Patton’s smile widen a bit more at that information.

“That’s great!” he exclaimed.

Logan nodded. “Say, Pat?” he started, cursing himself when Patton’s expression became more nervous. There was no way back now, though. “Is it alright if I hug you? I know the time in the--the bathroom was different and as you’ve never done so before you might not want--”

“Shh stop talking.” Patton pressed a finger to Logan’s lips before he could get lost in the flurry of words. “Yes, Logan. Of course you can. You don’t have to ask, I’ll always be down for a hug from Lo.” He blushed and giggled softly.

Logan’s face was now completely red as he slowly wrapped his arms around the other. This was... nice. He felt himself melt into the embrace, realizing only now how much he had been craving to be hugged. Touchstarved, that was the word he believed, though it was hard to think clearly at the moment. Patton’s arms were warm and comforting, and his smell surrounded Logan, wrapping around his mind as if it were a warm blanket.

Patton smiled as he felt the hug go from slightly stiff to completely relaxed as Logan almost collapsed against him. He seemed to relax right in front of Patton’s eyes. He rubbed his back gently and closed his eyes. It felt nice to just hug Logan, not because either of them needed to be comforted but just because.

Logan felt safe, not knowing what time it was, nor how long he had been holding onto Patton like he was his life source. His whole body had relaxed completely, everything felt so incredibly comfortable. “This is nice,” he whispered against the other’s shoulder, the hair on his neck being tickled by Patton’s breath. The urge to not lift his head and do something irrational was becoming almost unbearable.

“Indeed it is,” Patton agreed softly, breathing in deeply. Logan smelled nice and Patton had to resist the impulse to just blurt that out to him. He blushed lightly and held onto the logical side a bit tighter. “Hey Lo?” he whispered, smiling. “...Thanks.”

Logan smiled into the other’s shoulder, the urge becoming ten times worse. He now had to physically pull himself back to restrain himself. “What did I do to deserve your thankfulness, dear?” he asked.

Patton bit his lip slightly as he thought. “...Nothing... everything...” He shrugged. “Both? You did nothing because you were just you, but also everything that you are... I’m um, not the best with words but does that make sense?” he asked, blushing more.

Logan felt a smile on his face again, his whole being going soft as the normally so bubbly and outgoing side in front of him seemed to become incredibly shy all of a sudden. He placed his hand on Patton’s cheek, only realizing when he had already done so. “I-is this okay?” he asked, unsure of his every move, of how his breath smelled, of his posture, if his clothes were too wrinkled up. Trying to focus became a lot easier as he looked into the other’s eyes.

Patton nodded slightly, subconsciously moving the slightest bit closer. “It’s okay... it’s, um...” His brain lurched to a halt and he just stared at Logan, blushing under his freckles. He was chewing his lip nervously and looked down slightly, realizing he had gripped onto Logan’s tie.

Logan felt the slight tug at his tie, the urge to close the gap between them becoming more unbearable as he moved closer, closer and closer and--

“C-can I?” he whispered, a breath away from the other’s lips, almost not able to hold himself back but wanting to be sure, not wanting to hurt the person he... loved. He loved him.

In response, Patton leaned forward and pressed his lips against Logan’s, his eyes drifting closed. He felt like his face was on fire and his heart might burst out of his chest, despite how small it was.

The kiss was nothing special, but oh God it was. Every insecurity and doubt and thought had been washed away as their lips pressed together softly. It was an innocent kiss, like one two children might give each other on Valentine’s day in kindergarten, but so much more to Logan. He felt as if love was pouring out of him into the kiss as he got pulled in a bit more by his tie and his hand was resting on Patton’s cheek and--he pulled away slowly, and the faintest whisper could be heard.

“Logan, I love you.”

Patton smiled and kissed him again, only a bit more firmly, and asked shyly, “Lo, will you be my boyfriend?” He sounded unsure but happy, the question asked almost as innocently as their kiss had been.

All Logan could do was stare at the other and mutter a breathless, “yes...” before now he was the one to pull Patton into a kiss, firmer now but still so incredibly wonderful and Logan felt himself hoping this would never end, that they could just sit there for eternity.

Patton smiled widely and pulled him even closer, almost sitting in his lap. “I love you,” he whispered into the kiss. “Love you, love you...” Patton felt like he was floating and might never come down. He wouldn’t care if he didn’t.

Logan smiled and whispered back words he’d never thought he’d say. “I love you too, dearest.” The words were whispered against his boyfriend’s neck. Logan still felt the unbearable need to be as close to the other as he moved the slightest bit closer, Patton now actually in his lap, allowing Logan to wrap his arms around the other fully now. They kissed again, slowly this time, as if they had all the time the world could provide. They moved slow but also so fast for the logical side.

Patton pulled away and straightened Logan’s tie slightly. “You have no idea... how happy I am right now,” he mumbled softly, nuzzling his head into the logical side’s shoulder--his boyfriend. He’d never tire of hearing, saying, thinking that. His boyfriend.

Logan smiled softly, his head resting on top of the other’s. “I think I do... love.” The nickname was odd, though a warm feeling spread inside of him as he said it. They were in a relationship. Patton and him. Logan lifted the other’s head with his thumb and finger and kissed him again, feeling like he’s never get enough of this feeling. It could be an addiction, the touch so soft and gentle and loving.

Patton kept kissing him, just light kisses but they were the best thing in the world. Eventually he pulled away reluctantly. “I’d love to just sit here like this forever, Lolo, but I think I might fall asleep on you if we don’t move.”

Logan laughed silently at the nickname. “As much as I’d love that Pattycake, I don’t think we have the privilege as we have to take care of the others too.” As he spoke, he could feel Patton’s breathing slowing down, meaning he was about to fall asleep. “I’ll make a deal with you, dear. I check on the others every few hours and you cuddle up in... my room. Although your room’s effect is fun, it can be impractical for me. I’ll join you until I have to check on the others, alright?” he said, planting a quick kiss to his lips.

Patton nodded slightly. “That sounds like a good deal to me, Lolo...” He snuggled closer and vaguely realized that Logan had picked him up and was carrying him. He held on tighter to try and make it easier. “I could walk...” he offered.

Logan nodded, but carried him to the bedroom anyway, feeling the gentle pressure on his shoulder as Patton laid his head down. As Logan carefully laid him down, the other started lightly snoring. Logan put the blanket over him softly, repressing the urge to kiss his forehead as he exited the room to check on Virgil and Roman.

Virgil was smiling, snuggled close to Roman. When Logan walked in, he cheered quietly. “Congrats, Logan!” He clapped softly and smiled.

Logan looked at the other, eyes widening slightly. “You heard then, I assume?”

“Indeed I did.” Virgil smiled encouragingly at him. “After all, the mindscape has been awfully quiet for the past while, hasn’t it?” The smile faded slightly, and he looked down at Roman. “...Patton’s real lucky, and so are you.”

“I am lucky indeed,” he said softly, walking over to Virgil and slowly taking his bandaged arm, letting him stay cuddled up with Roman as he checked it over. It was healing extremely fast. “Good,” he whispered, and moved over to Roman’s arm. The wounds of the words seemed to be almost completely faded, and while his leg remained looking slightly disastrous, it seemed to have slowly but surely started healing as well.

Virgil sat up and took the prince’s hand. “Do you have any idea when Roman might be waking up?” he asked softly, rubbing Roman’s hand with his thumb. “Just... just curious. If you don’t that’s fine...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOGICALITY YAY!  
> Hope you enjoyed this fluffy, happy transition chapter  
> And for anyone wondering the same thing as Virgil, well...  
> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
> -Ro


	11. Coming Back

Roman felt something... no, someone?.. rubbing circles into his hand as he slowly started to slip back into reality, his breathing picking up slightly. He heard faint but familiar voices as his eyes moved behind his eyelids, trying to focus on where the voices were coming from.

“I--I can’t say for sure Virgil, I’m sorry. It might be tomorrow, or in three weeks.”

Logan. Meaning Virgil was sitting beside him. But Roman waited, feeling the strength slowly seep back into his body, but not yet able to move.

“Okay, I understand.” He looked down at the prince. “Well, guess all we can do is wait then.” Virgil leaned over to press a kiss on Roman’s forehead. “Thanks for coming to check on us, Logan. You can go back to your boyfriend now if you want.” He smiled “Go have some almost unbearably adorable cuddles. I’ll call you if anything happens.”

Their voices slipped in and out of reality for Roman, one moment vague and unclear and the next perfectly understandable. Logan left and virgil curled up against him. 

After about half an hour, Roman realized he could move again. Not thinking about the consequences, he immediately wrapped his arms around the now slightly snoring Virgil, so incredibly glad to be able to do so again that it didn’t even cross his mind how long he may have been gone.

Virgil snuggled closer with a smile. He suddenly jolted awake at the realization that he’d been pulled closer. “R-roman?!” He pulled him into a tight hug. “Oh my god Roman! Oh, oh god you don’t know how much I...” He took a deep breath and backed away. “We should get Logan.”

Roman let go of the other slowly so Virgil could stand up to get Logan as he just lay in bed, too tired still and too confused to think of how long, or when, or what was happening. The room was silent after Virgil left, everything only dimly lit, making it hard to see.

Virgil ran down the hall to Logan’s room and knocked on the door quickly, shaking slightly. He shifted from one for Logan to come to the door.

Logan opened the door slowly, quiet as to not wake up the now sleeping Patton. He was startled and a bit worried as Virgil grabbed his arms, but the confusion was replaced by utter joy as Virgil stammered out a few short words.

“He’s awake!--”

Logan’s eyes went wide and he quickly closed the door to pull Virgil, who was still holding onto his arms, quickly with him to the room Roman was resting in.

Virgil smiled widely and held tightly to Logan’s hand as they hurried to Roman’s room together. By the time they got there, the prince was sitting up slightly, and Virgil’s heart soared after seeing him lying down and unresponsive for so long. “I brought Logan to check on how you’re doing, and just to see you... We all missed you so much, love.”

Roman’s eyes went a bit wide, realizing something. “T-that’s--uhm. H-how long have i been gone?” he stuttered. He never stuttered while with the others. He looked at them, his heart breaking a bit as he saw how virgil looked at him with a sad smile while Logan looked down, seeming as if he was sad... Which was even more worrying as he’d never seen Logan really... emote at all.

Virgil sat down next to him and took his hand, so happy that he would squeeze back gently after-- “A bit more than a month,” he said softly. “The fans think Thomas is taking a break--which I mean he was--and they’re all being really supportive and telling him to take care of himself and take as long as he needs.” Virgil looked into Roman’s eyes and smiled softly.

Roman was taken aback by the response. He had been like this for more than a month? He hadn’t been able to provide support or anything useful for the group in a month? Thomas was on break because of his stupidity. Because he had failed him. It was all his f--his thought process screeched to a halt as he remembered what had caused his blackout in the first place. Those two words. Right. 

“I bet Thomas will be pretty happy to see you awake and moving about,” Virgil said encouragingly, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Now I think Logan might want to check you over...?” He glanced at the logical side for confirmation. “And we’ve found that it’s best if I leave for that.”

Logan nodded and Roman gave Virgil a long goodbye kiss, realizing how touch starved he truly was as the other returned it. As the door closed he looked up at Logan, knowing the logical side could provide him with more information. “Tell me exactly what happened, walking WikiHow.”

Logan felt something pulling at his heart at that nickname, but continued nonetheless. Roman had not yet seen him act ‘emotional’ so to speak, of course. “You blacked out after the words on your wrist, which now seem to have mostly faded, started bleeding. You passed out from the blood loss, I believe. As the words started fading a few days ago, we had reason to believe you’d wake up soon, which you indeed did, making us very glad.” As he spoke, the inflections slowly faded from his voice until he was speaking in the monotone voice he had stopped using.

Virgil wandered into the kitchen when it suddenly hit him that Roman hadn’t eaten anything in a month. He had to hold himself back from bringing the entire kitchen to him, remembering how difficult it was for Roman to eat at the best of times. What had they started with? Yogurt. He looked for a bowl and spoons. Virgil went back when he had gotten the yogurt and waited outside the door for Logan to be done. He frowned slightly as he listened... he couldn’t make out the words spoken, but Logan seemed to be acting different. It took a while for Virgil to realize he was speaking monotone and extremely evenly, which he hadn’t much since their three-way heart to heart.

Logan felt so incredibly wrong as he acted like he had always done, checking Roman’s wound. A blank expression fell over his face as he felt himself slowly slip into the almost trancelike state he had often resided in while being around the others and acting this way. “It seems your leg is recovering fast, which is convenient as you’ll be able to use the prosthetic leg I will be designing for you. I shall now let Virgil in.” He nodded to Roman, who responded with two words that went straight to Logan’s heart.

When Logan let him in, Virgil set the yogurt down and immediately hugged him tightly, sensing something more was probably wrong. “...So he’s still doing good?” he asked, feeling Logan nod. “Great. Why don’t you go back to patton now? He might be awake and wondering where you went.” Virgil pulled away and gave him a warm smile.

Logan left the room with a stiff walk after Virgil had hugged him and slowly made his way down the hallway, the words swirling inside of his mind... that one word in particular. The word he’d always been afraid of was the one Roman had decided to use, so casually. He stopped in front of the door and leaned against it slightly, trying to find his usual way of acting while trying to stop the word from clouding his head. He slowly entered the bedroom.

_ “Thanks, robot.” _

Robot. Roman had called him a robot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And he's awake!  
> That doesn't mean the angst is gone now, hun, just you wait...  
> -Ro


	12. Reprogramming

Patton rubbed his eyes and sleepily held out his arms. “Lolo?... Come cuddle meee...” He was too close to sleep to notice how stiff and upset Logan seemed to be.

Logan laid down beside Patton, trying his best to hold in his tears as the other wrapped his arms around him, warming him up and making the feelings spill out as soon as Logan was sure that Patton was asleep.

Patton snuggled close, falling back asleep with a soft noise of content.

Logan cried silently. He muffled his sobs into his pillow, his whole body trembling as he tried hard to not wake Patton. Robot. The one human invention he was afraid of. As soon as he’d come across the word, he’d feared it...

“Robot: /ˈrōˌbät,ˈrōbət/ noun. Used to refer to a person who behaves in a mechanical or unemotional manner”

Robot. Roman had just proved his one theory he did not want to be proven.

Patton shifted slightly. “Mm... Logie?” he mumbled. He opened his eyes slowly and pulled his crying boyfriend closer when he realized what was going on. “Shh, hey, it’s okay... It’s okay, love...” Patton kissed the tears off his cheeks and whispered reassurances to him until he calmed down a little. “I’m here for you, Logie bear... What’s wrong?”

Logan smiled through his tears at the nickname. “R-robot.” That was the only thing he was able to say as he hugged the other close, still trembling slightly. He breathed in the familiar scent of his boyfriend.

Patton frowned slightly. “What do you mean, Lo? You’re not a robot if that’s what you’re trying to say... You were just a bit unsure about how to show your emotions before. That doesn’t mean you don’t have them.” Patton held him and kissed his head.

Logan had calmed down slowly, now the only things that made him seem upset were the tears that were still slowly making their way down his cheeks.

Patton cupped Logan’s face and kept kissing the tears off of his cheeks. “See, Lolo? You’re not a robot. No robot could be as cuddly as you are anyway!” He gave Logan a soft kiss on his lips.

Logan slowly shook his head. The word burned into his brain, like the ghost of hands wrapping around his neck. “H-he’s r-right, I-s-shouldn’t have e-emotions...”

***

Virgil sat down next to Roman and took his hand. “Hey, you...” He smiled with tears in his eyes.”You don’t know how great it is to hear your voice. I brought you a glass of water and some yogurt if you’re thirsty or hungry.”

Roman smiled softly and nodded, taking the yogurt carefully. He’d try for Virgil at least.

Virgil smiled and kissed him softly. And again. And again. And again. He eventually stopped to let Roman eat. “Sorry, Ro... It’s just been so long.” Virgil turned to look towards the door with a slight frown. “...I hope Logan’s okay, he seemed...”

Roman looked up at him, swallowing slowly, a frown on his face. “He seemed what? He’s always acted like that. Nothing unusual,” he stated, being confused as to why the other seemed so worried. Logan represented a robot more than anything, why would Virgil be concerned about someone who doesn’t experience emotions?

“What? No, he--” Virgil turned to look back at him. “Ohh... right...” He settled down. “Roman, love, Logan has changed a bit. He’s started letting his emotions show in front of us.” Virgil smiled softly. “Especially in front of Patton...” he added with a chuckle.

Roman’s eyes widened slightly as the realization dawned on him. “I-I called him a robot.” He paused as he heard a faint sobbing sound coming from the room next to his. Logan. “Shit...” he said while trying to get up, his wings and muscles stiff. He fell back down again, grunting in pain.

“Oh baby, you didn’t know...” Virgil gripped his hands and looked at him. “You haven’t moved in a month love... It might be easier if I went and got him to come here.”

Roman shook his head and tried to get up, slowly this time, grunting a bit but being able to sit up slowly, his foot dangling over the edge of the bed. Slowly but surely he flapped his tired wings to rise up a bit, almost falling to the floor again, but keeping himself steady.

Virgil wrapped an arm around his waist. “If you’re going to insist on going to his room, I’m helping you get there, no arguments.” He opened the door and helped Roman down the hall.

Roman stood outside the door for a few seconds, tears welling up inside of his eyes as his heart broke after he heard the broken words. After a while he knocked on the door softly, leaning on Virgil a bit as they waited, his eyes still wide in shock. Logan showing his emotions seemed odd, wrong almost.

Virgil squeezed him gently and let Roman lean against him as they waited. He turned to kiss his cheek, trying to push his worries about how bony his boyfriend was out of his mind.

Patton wiped the tears off of Logan’s cheeks, sitting both of them up. “Come on Lolo, that was the door...” He helped him up off of the bed.

Logan smiled and kissed him softly, but shook his head and stayed on the bed. “You get the door. I don’t look... proper, for the others to see now.” He cringed as he realized how his voice broke at the end, Patton probably realizing that he meant Roman, that he meant “not emotionless enough.” So he stayed on the bed. Patton walked towards the door and opened it slowly, revealing Roman, leaning against a worried-looking Virgil. Logan cursed silently, his face forming an emotionless mask.

Virgil looked at Patton and nodded slightly. “Hi guys... We um, came over because Roman refused to stay in bed until he’d said something to Logan.”

Patton nodded and stepped back slightly. “Lolo? Roman wants to talk to you...” Patton’s face fell slightly when he noticed how Logan was suppressing his emotions again, but he didn’t say anything.

Logan suddenly felt incredibly uncomfortable in the others’ presence. “Logan will do, and what do you want to talk about, Roman? You should be in bed recovering if I’m not mistaken.” He felt wrong, everything felt wrong but he walked towards them nonetheless, stiff as a... a robot. He frowned as the word popped into his head again, though he quickly returned to his cold expression. He stood in front of the others, in the middle of the doorframe as if he’d been programmed to do so.

Patton and Virgil both looked incredibly concerned, Patton close to tears. Virgil very gently nudged Roman, encouraging him to speak. To do something that could stop Logan from losing all the progress he had made being open and letting his emotions show.

“I--uh...” Roman was at a loss for words, the crying he had heard seeming so odd now. This was Logan. But as he looked at the others, their worried faces, he knew that it wasn’t. “I-I’m sorry for calling you a robot. a--I didn’t mean it.” logan physically stiffened at the use of the word robot. His shoulders raised up slightly and his eyes focused on a spot behind Roman. He breathed out slowly. “It’s okay to show emotions, Logan.”

Patton walked up behind Logan and kissed his cheek softly, giving Roman a grateful look for apologizing and saying the second part. Virgil leaned into Roman slightly and nodded to Logan.

Logan knew it was alright, but he had to snap out of it first, which approved to be quite difficult. “Thank you for your kind words. And I shall take it into consideration.” Uneasy. Everything felt so uneasy as Patton kissed his cheek. He somehow couldn’t react as Virgil nodded to him, and after a while they left. And Logan stood in front of the closed door, trying his best to snap out of it. He shook slightly, Patton’s hand still resting on his shoulder.

“Lolo...?” Patton said quietly. “I’m cold... will you please come cuddle with me?” He had started pulling Logan towards the bed before the end of his sentence.

Logan slowly let himself be pulled into a hug, feeling himself slowly lose the stiffness and melt into the hug. “T-thank you, Patton.”

Patton smiled slightly when he felt Logan relax. He sat back down on the bed and brought Logan with him. “Hey Lo?” he said quietly. “...I love you.”

Logan melted completely. “I love you too... Cookie.” He cringed at the nickname but Patton squealed and hugged him even tighter. As he buried his head into Logan’s neck, hair tickling his jawline, he knew he would now have to use it more often.

Patton snuggled closer with a wide smile. Logan had given him a nickname! Not only did he find it really cute, but it was a nice change from when Logan had refused his own nickname.

Logan smiled softly, making a silent promise to try and act “normal” around Roman. This facade was extremely unhealthy. He snuggled into Patton more, his head resting in the crook of the other’s neck.

Patton squeezed Logan. “You didn’t tell me Roman was awake, Lolo! That’s so exciting! And you’ve been saying his leg’s been getting better too...”

Logan hummed into his neck, not feeling like explaining much. He simply cuddled up to Patton more, smiling softly at the familiar smell, the reassuring and steady heartbeat.

Patton understood Logan’s noncommittal answer and just held him, resting his head on top of Logan’s and smelling his hair. “How do you smell like books?” he whispered. “It’s almost like cuddling the best library ever.”

Logan couldn’t help but chuckle at that sentence and pressed himself against Patton a bit more. “Hmm. how come you smell like chocolate chip cookies and summer rain, love?” He was practically laying on top of Patton, hoping the other wouldn’t mind but wanting to be as close as physically possible as he felt himself getting tired.

Patton smiled widely and pressed a kiss to Logan’s forehead before closing his eyes and relaxing more. “Mm, goodnight Lolo...” he mumbled quietly, shifting slightly to get into a more comfortable position.

Logan mumbled a response before laying down again, realizing only as Patton was asleep that he still had his glasses on. He carefully took them off and placed them on the nightstand, next to his own, before cuddling up to the other again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know you probably don't believe me, but the angst is actually going to tone down for a few chapters after this. We'll get to see them... is there a word for the opposite of sad? I wouldn't know lol  
> Love you all eat your vegetables  
> -Ro


	13. Making Amends

Virgil helped Roman back down the hall, staying pretty quiet the whole time other than to ask Roman to adjust his grip. He settled the prince back on the bed and went to close the door.

Roman laid down slowly, feeling as if he had done his best, but it may not have been enough. He made a grabbing motion towards Virgil, feeling the need to be comforted.

Virgil climbed on top of him, snuggling close. He laid his head in the crook of Roman’s neck and started tracing swirling patterns along the prince’s upper arm.

Virgil sat up. “Roman... do you think you could try to eat a bit more? I’m a bit worried...” He squeezed his hand. “But of course if you don’t feel up to it that’s okay. You ate some yogurt.”

Roman slowly sat up, his muscles still sore. “I’ll try. Sorry for making you worried.” He took the yogurt that had been standing on his nightstand and lifted up the spoon, feeling so full already but not wanting to worry the other more.

Virgil kissed him softly. “Thank you, baby... but please don’t eat more than you feel you can.” He smiled slightly and got up. “How about some water?”

Roman nodded slightly but put another spoonful into his mouth before setting the bowl down. “Yeah. sorry,” he whispered quietly.

“No need to apologize, my prince. I’ll be back in a minute.” Virgil smiled softly and went to the kitchen, pouring him a glass of water and coming back.

Roman watched Virgil leave and let out a long, shuddering breath he did not know he had been holding in. he hadn’t hurt Logan, had he? He didn’t have emotions. Right? 

Virgil sat back next to Roman and kissed his cheek before handing him his water. “There you go, love,” he said softly. He scooted a bit closer to Roman, hoping he wasn’t acting too clingy.

Roman felt his heart make a little leap as Virgil scooted closer. He took the glass and gulped down half of the water before putting it down and slowly wrapping his arm around the other’s waist, leaning in his shoulder as he scooted closer himself.

“I missed you so much, Ro... You don’t know how lonely I felt for the past month.” Virgil rested his head against Roman and traced light, swirling patterns along his arm. “But there has been at least one good thing that’s happened...” he said quietly. “Logan started opening up a bit, letting himself show how he feels.”

Roman’s whole body tensed up at the last sentence. “I-I don’t understand,” he said quietly, not wanting to disturb the quiet that had fallen over the room like a thick blanket. “I’ve never seen him express any emotion, a-and even if he were hiding it, he wouldn’t be able to keep it in all the time... would he?” Roman tried to remember moments that he’d seen the other emotional, before suddenly remembering the times he’d heard faint sobbing on the other side of the wall, shrugging it off as someone else.

Virgil cupped Roman’s face and looked at him. “I don’t know what to tell you, Ro, other than that I sat with him as he cried. I understand if you feel confused by that because I don’t know if you’ve ever seen him really emotional... other than over Patton’s puns,” he added, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

Roman chuckled with a sad smile, suddenly remembering all the times he had used harmful nicknames for the other. He could’ve made him feel even worse than he might already be feeling. “I-I could’ve hurt him more than he might have already been hurting. I... I could’ve sent him over the edge like I did with you, when I made you duck out. I--” He choked up a bit, realizing something. “All I do is drag you all down with me?” The last sentence was whispered, so quiet Virgil couldn’t hear it.

Virgil pulled him close and rubbed the spot between his wings. “Shh, baby, you didn’t know... Don’t feel too bad, if you didn’t know how you were affecting him. But now you do and you’ll stop, right? Just like how you were the one to convince me to come back. You’re doing all you can to be better, and that’s enough.” He kissed Roman softly.

Roman hummed in approval into the kiss, though his mind was eating away at him as they snuggled together again. And as the small clock on the nightstand showed it was 11 pm he told Virgil he would be back soon, getting up and leaving the room slowly. His wings made a soft swooshing noise as Virgil nodded slightly, already half asleep again as Roman softly closed the door behind him and started making his way down the hallway.

Virgil snuggled into the blankets more, sighing softly as his eyes flickered shut. Roman was awake, he was going to be okay... everything was going to be okay. Those were his last thoughts before he truly fell asleep.

Logan woke up feeling incredibly safe. He turned around before realizing he was wrapped in Patton’s arms. Smiling softly, he carefully pulled his arms off him and got up, getting out of bed to go to the bathroom for a drink of water. 

Roman slowly exited the bathroom, closing the door behind him and making his way towards the kitchen, leaning against the wall slightly for support. Right as he was about to turn the corner he saw Logan, taking a sharp breath and changing his course, now flying towards the logical side.

Logan turned away from the bedroom to continue to the bathroom and jumped slightly as Roman soared towards him. “Hello Roman,” he said as he regained some composure. “You seem to be recovering your strength well.” Logan smiled slightly at him.

Roman looked at the other, his eyes slightly widening as Logan smiled at him but regaining his normal posture again quickly. “Wonderful to see you again Logan, and yes indeed. You helped quite a lot I hear,” he said, giving the other an awkward smile while he leaned against the wall. “But uhm. Truly, Logan. I deeply apologize for every nickname or insult or--” He stopped mid sentence, hoping the other would understand and feeling the need to satisfy the incredible guilt he felt.

Logan smiled a little wider and nodded. “Roman, I accept your apologies and would like to return the favor... I apologize for all the rude things I said as well.” He moved closer and held his arms out. “Would you like a hug? Patton is warming me up to them.”

Roman smiled and nodded, returning the other’s embrace and hugging him close for a few seconds before letting go. “Thank you. And really, my apologies. I should’ve... noticed these things are hurtful sooner,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

“All is forgiven, Roman. Now get back to bed... you should sleep, it’s fairly late. I’ll see you in the morning.” Logan patted his shoulder gently and walked around Roman to the bathroom. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight Lo,” Roman said as he watched the other close the door before carefully making his way back, his wings still weak and his toes balancing himself as he made slight hops, feathers rustling slightly as he lifted himself off of the ground before landing in front of the door to his room. Seeing Virgil now fast asleep, he chuckled quietly and laid down beside him, his wings wrapping around the both of them again, and he drifted off to sleep, ‘I hope I did it right’ swirling in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the angst slowly fades for the moment...  
> We're going to get to see someone we haven't for a while in the next chapter!  
> -Ro


	14. A Long Awaited Party

Virgil slowly woke up the next morning, not really remembering the previous day in his haze of sleep, but then he felt Roman pull him a bit closer and everything came back. He smiled widely and kissed the prince very gently until he woke up. “Good morning, my love!”

“Good morning my dark angel,” he said while unwrapping his black feathered wings to let Virgil move freely, his sleepy haze blown away immediately as the other kissed him softly again before they both got up. Roman grunted softly at his still sore muscles but flapped his wings so he rose up again nonetheless. Now balancing on his good leg lightly he looked at the other, still sleepy trait. “Will you join me on my trip to the kitchen, dear?” he asked, holding out his hand to the other.

Virgil nodded and got up, wrapping an arm around his waist. “Indeed I will, my brave hero.” He kissed Roman’s cheek and blinked the sleep out of his eyes before they started heading to the kitchen.”...Why exactly are we going to the kitchen, love?” Virgil asked, trying not to sound too hopeful or pressuring.

Roman’s smile faltered a bit but he quickly regained his normal posture. “Well I have to make my love and the two nerds a grand breakfast, don’t I? You all have had to live without my wonderful cooking for too long!” he said, hoping Virgil would let the topic go. The yogurt had almost been too much yesterday and he did not know if he’d be able to handle much more of anything involving calories or food in general at the moment. But Virgil’s hopeful eyes made his heart ache.

Virgil nodded and kissed his cheek again to hide the disappointment he knew was probably visible in his eyes. He reminded himself that Roman had eaten the yogurt right after he woke up yesterday, and was clearly trying. He let it go. “Indeed we did, my love. How thoughtful of you to make us all breakfast,” he said lightly. “One of the many things I love about you,” Virgil added as they got to the kitchen.

The theatrical trait felt his heart melt a little at that statement. They walked into the kitchen to be greeted by Logan, who had his head buried in a book, his right hand absentmindedly combing through Patton’s hair. The other had been laying down with his head in Logan’s lap, humming quietly, but as soon as they walked in he got up and attacked Roman into a bone crushing hug. “Roman look at you! You’re up and you’re moving around almost by yourself, yeah you! How are you feeling, kiddo?” Patton pulled away and smiled brightly. “Did you get some rest last night?”

Roman nodded and smiled at the other, feeling like he belonged, a feeling he had missed for a long time. And the smile didn’t leave his face as he made his way to the kitchen, telling Virgil with a few words and a quick kiss that he’d be fine standing on his own. And he started to prepare breakfast as the other three sat down.

Virgil looked down at his hands and smiled softly. “So how are you two lovebirds doing?” he asked teasingly.

Patton blushed a little but smiled, leaning slightly towards Logan. “We’re doing great, aren’t we Lolo?” He kissed Logan’s cheek and put a hand on his boyfriend’s knee. “And the two of you seem to be doing pretty good too, huh?”

Roman nodded and felt his heart warm up a bit more as he saw how Logan gave Virgil a soft smile, his hands still combing through Patton’s hair as the other patted Virgil’s arm clumsily, all of them seeming so incredibly at peace.

Logan looked at Virgil for a moment before focusing his gaze on Roman, who had been staring at him before quickly looking at the pan in front of him. The ghost of a smile hovered on his lips and Logan finally realized the prince had accepted him being able to emote.

Patton snuggled closer to Logan and smiled happily, leaning into the touch. He kissed Logan softly wherever he could easily reach.

Virgil rolled his eyes, but smiled, happy that his friends seemed so happy and relaxed. “We should go and tell Thomas that Roman’s awake and doing well,” he said.

Roman nodded, a heavy feeling on his shoulders as he realized how much he must’ve worried his host, though he shrugged it off, handing the other sides their plates as he sat down next to Virgil, his head leaning on the other’s shoulder as he watched them enjoy the dish.

Virgil scooted his chair a bit closer as he ate. “Thank you for making breakfast, love, it’s delicious.” He smiled at Roman through a mouthful and swallowed.

Patton chimed in with his agreement. “It’s really good, kid! Thanks so much!”

Logan nodded in agreement, swallowing his food before speaking up. “It truly is outstanding Roman! You’ve done a wonderful job. That’s one of the many things we’ve missed about you,” he said, an awkward smile on his face as he tried to warm up to the idea of fully letting his emotions show.

Virgil collected everyone’s dishes as they finished and washed them, humming softly.

“Should we go to see Thomas now?” Patton suggested excitedly. “It’s been too long since we had a good old ‘T’ party, and he can see how Roman’s doing!”

Logan chuckled and nodded, looking at Roman for approval, though not quite sure if it was for going to Thomas or for him showing emotion.

Roman looked at Logan for a second before he agreed. “I think it’d be best not to keep our wonderful host waiting any longer. Don’t you my love?” he said, wrapping an arm around Virgil’s waist.

Virgil leaned into him a little and smiled. “I do agree, dear.” He kissed Roman’s cheek and they all went to see Thomas.

Patton popped up first, smiling excitedly. “Heyyyyyyy Thomas?” he stage whispered. “We’ve got some news for you!”

Logan rose up beside him, wrapping an arm around the fatherly trait and smiling gently. Thomas had already gotten used to him emoting and so Logan watched as their host sat up straight from his laid back position, closing his laptop as he did so and looking at them. Curiosity was clearly visible in his eyes.

Virgil kissed Roman once more and rose up with the prince. “Hey there, Thomas... It’s good news. Really good news.” He had a wide smile on his face.

“Roman’s back!” Patton squealed excitedly, clapping his hands.

Thomas’s face lit up. “Hey, Roman!”

Roman waved awkwardly, not knowing if he was wanted, but that doubt was almost immediately erased as Thomas tackled him into a hug. Both Patton and Virgil joined in quickly and after a hesitant second Logan did the same. Roman’s wings wrapped around all of them as he laughed happily. “Hey to you too, Thomas,” he whispered as the four pairs of arms around him made his whole body feel warm.

Virgil nuzzled as close as he could, which wasn’t difficult since he’d already been standing right next to Roman. Eventually, Logan stepped back again, followed by Thomas and Patton. “It’s so good to see you, princey...” Thomas looked him up and down. “And you seem to be doing pretty well. When did you wake up?”

“Uh--yesterday...” Roman smiled at him awkwardly, hoping for someone else to explain, holding onto Virgil tightly as he laid his head on his shoulder.

Logan stepped forward slightly. “Ah, I suppose I could step in. He woke up about 27 hours ago, though he was in need for recovery and very weak, so we nursed him up until now. Virgil of course played the main part as he would not leave his side.”

Virgil blushed lightly and rested his head on Roman’s shoulder. “I don’t plan to anytime soon, either,” he mumbled, smiling softly at the prince.

“He’s doing pretty well now, though,” Patton added. “Kiddo even made us all breakfast this morning.”

Thomas smiled and nodded, almost asking another question before he bit his tongue. “That’s good, Roman. I’m glad.”

Roman hummed lightly. “So how have you been doing Thomas? I hope my absence did not cause you trouble?” he said, grinning at their host like he was supposed to, but not meaning it fully. “And you have been keeping that beautiful body of yours in shape I see!” he added, trying to switch topics quickly as he realized what the answer would be to another question. He gestured to Thomas’s slim figure, ignoring the small stab of pain as he realized he would never achieve a similar posture and smiling widely.

Thomas smiled a bit sadly at him. “Well, it’s great to have you back, Roman, I’ll say that.”

Patton interrupted. “Say, Thomas, it was awesome bringing everyone up to see you, but I think maybe Roman should go back to resting for a little while, he’s been up and about since he woke up. Maybe we can do a sides video soon and all hang out for longer!”

Logan nodded as they said their goodbyes to Thomas and slowly sank out again. Upon appearing in the mind palace once more, Roman slumped against Virgil slightly, breaking down the energetic facade he had held up for as long as they were around their host. “Sleep,” he muttered as he leaned against Virgil more, the other almost falling over from the pressure on his left side as he did so. Roman fought to stay awake long enough to get to a room with a soft surface so he could rest.

Virgil helped him to his bedroom and gently laid him, already mostly asleep, on the bed. He took a deep breath and sighed softly, turning away from the prince to see Patton behind him. “...He complimented Thomas’s body because that’s what he wishes he looked like... Why can’t Roman see that he’s actually thinner than him, and he’s going to hurt himself if he doesn’t eat?” he whispered.

Patton smiled a sad smile as he walked towards him and wrapped an arm around Virgil’s shoulder. Both of them looked at the now sleeping Roman. “I don’t know, kiddo, but we’ll try to help as much as we can,” Patton said, not bothering to wipe away the single tear that made its way down his cheek as they looked at the peacefully sleeping prince. His cheeks were hollow, cheekbones seeming like they could cut through his skin. Patton turned to Virgil. “Let’s get you some hot chocolate. Get your mind off things.”

Virgil nodded slightly, leaning against Patton and following him to the kitchen. His mind, however, did not stop whirring away, thinking about Roman. By the time he was sitting at the table holding a warm mug with marshmallows bobbing in it (“Marshmallows make everything better,” Patton insisted) he had thought of a plan to try and help his boyfriend see himself the way Virgil did.

Logan, who had just gotten back from helping Thomas out to brainstorm for a video, sat down at the table with them, smiling as he saw how Patton had made a smiley face with his marshmallows. “After Roman has woken up, we should talk over a possible video idea Thomas and Joan are working on at this very moment. I will need Virgil’s opinion on it for sure, as it is... a little extreme.” He looked at the anxious side, knowing how waiting would make the worst case scenarios in his head even worse.

Virgil nodded slightly, taking a slow sip of his hot chocolate. “What is it?” he asked. By this point he was used to being asked his opinion on different videos, like when they went to Patton’s room.

The father figure also looked at Logan curiously. “Yeah, what is it?”

“I do not want to discuss it without Roman in our presence, as he has to give his opinion as well. But of course, if Thomas and Joan like the idea we have nothing to say in the matter, though we would be able to change parts of the script slightly if it makes any of us feel discomfort,” he said. Not wanting to talk about the topic anymore, almost feeling like he was being watched by the ‘topic’ itself, he shuddered slightly and took a sip of the hot chocolate Patton had just placed in front of him.

Virgil nodded again and drank his hot chocolate quickly. He got up and put the cup in the sink. “I think I’m going to go check up on Roman... maybe have a little nap myself,” he said quietly.

Patton nodded and held his arms out for a hug, which Virgil gave him with a small smile. “If anything goes wrong, just shout for us, kiddo. Mkay?” Virgil nodded and went to Roman’s room.

Logan watched as Virgil left the room, then looked at Patton hoping for approval with his way of putting off the conversation. His bubbly boyfriend looked back for a moment and then nodded, wrapping his arms around Logan from where he was standing beside his chair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes that may be a reference to a specific thing because I may be an absolute nerd.  
>  Look at this! Everyone seems pretty happy, don't they? Sure, things aren't perfect but when are they? Maybe this is a turning point...  
> 


	15. His Broken Prince

Roman opened his eyes tiredly as someone laid down next to him. He lifted his head slowly, smiling as Virgil’s face came into view. “Hey, love.” He didn’t notice the few stray hairs that had fallen out of place while sleeping. The prince reached out to cup Virgil’s face.

“Hi baby... Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” Virgil shifted closer to cuddle him. “Hey, so Logan was talking to Thomas and they started brainstorming for a video,” he said, hoping to cheer Roman up slightly with the prospect that he was already helping Thomas again.

Roman looked at him, a smile edging onto his face as he sat up slightly. “Well, what is it about, my dark angel?” he asked, hoping he, or Thomas had come up with something good to show that he wasn’t completely useless at last.

“He didn’t say, but we’re going to talk about it together later.” Virgil sat up suddenly. “But Roman, I wanted to try something, okay?” He pulled off his hoodie and rummaged in his pocket. “...Do you think I’m fat?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

Roman looked at him in surprise. He looked at his well-defined cheekbones, his skinny neck, and stomach that seemed to be flat even after consuming a huge amount of food. “No, of course not dearest! Why would you think that about yourself?” he asked, not realizing how wrong that sounded coming from him, as Virgil laced their fingers together.

Virgil smiled sadly and shook his head slightly. “I don’t, baby... I may have struggles, but that’s not one of them. I just needed you to say it before I do this.” He kissed Roman gently and pulled out a tape measure and a red marker. “Baby, will you let me wrap this around your wrist?... And I want you to mark where it crosses over with the sharpie.”

Roman visibly paled. Virgil wanted to see how fat his arms were. He remembered the pride he had once felt at being able to wrap his hand around his own wrist, though it had been long forgotten as he strived for being able to do so at his elbow. He nodded and stuck out his arm, cringing slightly as Virgil wrapped the tape measure around his wrist, knowing fully well that if Virgil did the same, his number would be lower.

Virgil held his hand gently and waited for Roman to take the pen and mark a red line at the measurement of his wrist. He then slowly pulled the tape measure away and kissed where it had been lying against his skin. “...Now look, baby.” He held up the skinny strip and pointed at the mark. “That’s the size of your wrist. You marked it, so you know it’s true.” Virgil wrapped it around his own wrist.

Roman swallowed dryly, being prepared to feel even worse about his own body as Virgil marked his own measurement and slowly pulled it off of his wrist again, holding up the tape in front of him to show his own mark. Of course it was way smaller than his own--

“You see the smaller one, Roman? That’s yours.” He pointed at the red line that was a good few centimeters away from the other. 

Roman was confused out of his mind. “T-that’s yours. The larger one is mine... right?”

Virgil shook his head and pulled out a second sharpie, this one black. “Watch.” He wrapped it back around and drew over his own red line with the black. He pulled it off. “See? The black mark is mine, the bigger one.and if we wrap it back around your wrist...” He did so as he spoke. “See how the black mark is past where it crosses over on you?”

Roman looked at the strip in shock, it slowly dawning on him what Virgil had done this for. A guilt wrapped around his mind. “S-sorry for worrying you,” he whispered, not wanting to look at the tape again. He realized what he was doing was unhealthy, but not being able to stop himself from cringing as he saw how fat his legs were... though according to Virgil and the measure they probably weren’t.

Virgil kissed him sweetly. “You don’t have to apologize, baby, you didn’t know. Your perception was wrong, what you saw was wrong... Is there anywhere else you want to compare? I understand if you can’t quite grasp it yet...” He cupped Roman’s face and looked at him lovingly. “I just want to make you happy.”

Roman looked at his lover. His perfect skin, perfect weight, perfect height. Perfect body. This person said Roman was thinner than him. “Stomach a-and thigh,” Roman whispered, not wanting and not being able to believe the fact Virgil was laying out for him.

Virgil nodded. “Stomach and thigh.” He gently pushed up Roman’s shirt and wrapped the tape measure around his almost nonexistent stomach, letting Roman mark the spot with red. Virgil then lifted his own shirt and wrapped it around his tummy, marking in black. When he pulled the tape measure away and held it up, the marks were so far away Virgil had to bite his lip to hold back tears. How had Roman gotten this thin and not noticed?

Roman’s mouth felt dry as he looked at the two lines, them almost being ten, maybe twenty centimeters away from each other. He silently lifted up his leg to wrap the tape around his thigh and mark it, somewhat hoping it would be different as he felt the fat wiggle underneath his leg, but he marked it and pulled back, giving it to Virgil who wrapped it around his own. Virgil was now avoiding his eyes, looking downward as he marked his own line, and Roman knew he was hurting him.

Virgil held the tape measure up to show Roman the difference between their lines. “See, baby? You’re not fat, not even slightly.” He kissed Roman gently, and again, and again. “I love you, you know?”

“I love you too,” Roman whispered and let Virgil wrap his arms around him. He buried his head into the other’s shoulder to try and stop himself from crying, though failing to do so quickly as his shoulders shook, muffled sobs escaping his lips as he grabbed onto Virgil. Skinny, perfect Virgil who loved him. Who loved this sorry excuse for a prince. “S-sorry,” he said, voice muffled by Virgil’s thick hoodie his face was buried into as he sobbed, not knowing why exactly.

“Shh, it’s okay baby, it’s okay...” Virgil held him close and rubbed between his wings. “Just take deep breaths, it’s okay...” He kissed the top of Roman’s head. “You’re going to be okay, everything will be okay, I promise.” He didn’t know how he could promise that, but he’d say whatever he could to calm his broken prince.

Roman’s sobs slowly calmed down into sniffles. Still holding onto Virgil tightly as if he was his lifeline, he tried to believe the words Virgil said. He really did, but it was so so incredibly hard to do so... but the gentle voice and the incredibly nice feeling of his hand rubbing between his wings and helped him calm down slowly. “T-thank you. And... sorry for h-hurting you,” he said, his wings fluttering a bit as he buried his head into Virgil’s shoulder.

Virgil tilted Roman’s head up and kissed him sweetly. “It’s okay love, I’m fine, and you will be too.” He gently pushed the prince’s hair out of his eyes. “I have one more question for you baby, I promise it’s the last one... Do you think you could eat something now, or do you want to wait until dinnertime?”

Roman felt his stomach tighten, knowing he should, but simply not being able to do so without physically forcing himself... but he had to. “I.. I’ll eat now. What d-do you want me to eat?” he said, the word sounding odd to him. Eat. Food. both words sounded odd and not right to him.

Virgil’s face brightened and he kissed Roman happily. “Whatever you feel you can, my amazing prince. How about some cereal, or maybe some fruit?” he suggested. “If there’s something else that you think would be good, you can have that instead, of course.”

“Cereal is fine, I think,” he said, a smile plastered on his face as Virgil kissed him again before practically bouncing out of the room. The smile faded from his lips as soon as the door shut. Cereal. The only kind they had was the usual, natural kind, meaning about 124 calories. The milk on top of that, about 146. He could feel his stomach turning already, but he would finish the bowl. For Virgil.

Virgil hummed softly as he made a bowl of cereal. Patton looked up from the couch. “You seem pretty happy, kiddo... why are you making cereal at 2 in the afternoon?”

Virgil smiled gently at him. “It’s not for me... it’s for Roman.” He brought the bowl back to the prince’s room.

Logan raised and eyebrow at Patton, who just chuckled and shrugged, sitting down beside him again.

As the door cracked open, Roman prepared himself for whatever amount of calories Virgil would be carrying in that way too large bowl. Smiling at him, making sure not to let his facade down, he took the bowl, seeing how the sugary cereal slightly swam on top. Virgil handed him a spoon and Roman gave him a kiss before looking down at the bowl again.

Virgil sat next to him and gave Roman a quick kiss. “Do you want to play our game again, baby?” he asked with a smile. “Two kisses per spoon?”

Roman smiled at Virgil as he put the first spoonful in his mouth, swallowing slowly before he responded. “I’d love that, dear.” So they began. Roman’s stomach hurt as he forced every bite down, hiding it well underneath the smile and the kisses he gave the other. When the bowl was about halfway empty, he started to feel like he was about to throw up, though, forcing away the feeling, he continued. The facade stood like a wall as he kept eating, but the kisses started helping him less and less with every spoon.

Virgil held his hands for a moment, stopping the spoon from going back to Roman’s mouth as he saw the expression on his face. “Do you need to stop, baby?” he asked in a whisper. “You can, you’ve done so well...”  He had a sneaking suspicion that Roman wouldn’t stop on his own even if he was in immense pain, in an attempt to make him happy.

Roman shook his head and smiled at Virgil. The bowl was almost empty and he felt like one big ball of fat but he continued. For Virgil, he thought. He’d make him happy with this, right? He put the spoon into his mouth again, forcing himself to swallow and pick up the last few bits of cereal, a small puddle of milk left in the bottom of the bowl. Not able to stop his hands from shaking anymore, he swallowed the last bite, looking up at Virgil in hope of seeing pride in his eyes.

Virgil was smiling, but he also had tears in his eyes. “Oh, Roman, love...” He put the bowl on the nightstand and took his shaking hands in his own. “Oh baby...” Virgil held him close and softly kissed him as many times as he could. 

Roman’s smile fluttered downward as Virgil peppered him in kisses. Not able to hold up the mask anymore, he looked at him with a sad smile, knowing Virgil knew. He forced himself to stay on the bed with his love and not fly towards the bathroom. Roman held onto him again, feeling like he’d done so way too many times since waking back up.

“I. Love. You. So. Much.” Virgil whispered a word between every kiss. “So. Handsome. So. Strong.” He pulled him even closer and could taste the sweetness of the cereal as the kisses got deeper. “I’m. So. Proud... Of... You.”

Roman enjoyed the kiss, Virgil’s lips tasting the best kind of sweet as he wrapped his arms around his waist, his wings wrapping around them both. His mind went blank, only focusing on Virgil, the thoughts about calories and toilet seats fading away quickly.

Virgil held him close and kissed him, long, lingering touches now. He smiled very slightly as Roman pulled him in and started kissing back more. He ran one hand slowly through his boyfriend’s hair and hummed quietly into the kiss, relaxing slightly.

Roman’s hands pressed into Virgil’s back slightly, wanting him as close as physically possible. He sat up a bit more, allowing him to deepen the kiss a bit, smiling into it as Virgil hummed slightly.

Virgil ignored the first time he heard a knock at the door, but pulled away slightly when the knocking got a bit louder. “Who is it?” he asked, not looking away from Roman.

Patton opened the door. “I was wondering if you two were ready to talk about the next video idea.”

Logan poked his head out from behind the doorframe and smirked as he was what position they were in. “I think Roman is wide awake, so we can indeed proceed to do so.”

Roman looked at Patton and instinctively wrapped his wings around Virgil even tighter, not wanting to move but knowing they had to. He grumbled a bit as he slowly let go.

“Come on,” Patton said with a smile. “Let’s go to the living room to talk, shall we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little more Romangst before we mellow that out for a while, as he accepts what's going on and how to change. I'm so proud of him  
> Eat decent meals, okay kids? I feel responsible now and I am a concerned Ren  
> -Ro


	16. Dramatic Reveals

Virgil reluctantly climbed off of Roman’s lap and off of the bed, helping Roman up. He wrapped his arm around his waist and followed Patton and Logan to the living room. “So what is the new video idea?” Virgil asked as he sat on the couch with Roman.

Logan adjusted his glasses and ran his hand through his hair, a habit he had picked up whenever he was nervous. “Alright. Since we’ve been on a break for a few weeks, Joan had the idea to come back with something big. So they asked me to inform them if there were any other sides or characters we had not yet introduced, wanting to do a ‘dramatic reveal’ of sorts... I told them there was one we had to introduce first if we wanted to do so with all of them.” He paused, watching how Virgil tensed up.

Virgil gripped Roman’s hand tighter, his entire body tensing as he realized just what Logan was implying. He moved closer to Roman. “They want to do a video... with D-Deceit?”he said quietly. His eyes flashed with memories of things he’d rather forget. “What’s the basis of the video?” Virgil tried not to let his voice shake.

Logan realized Virgil was getting more and more paranoid and proceeded with care, not wanting to send the side into a full blown panic attack. “They want him to pretend to be Patton, meaning one of us will call him out at the end. It will all follow a strict script and if he tries to do anything we will step into action and blow off the video.” He paused as he looked at Virgil, who now couldn’t contain his shaking. “We won’t let anything happen to you, Virge. You’re one of us,” he said softly.

Patton nodded quickly. “Of course nothing will happen to you kiddo. We’ll all be right here.”

Virgil nodded very slowly and squeezed Roman’s hand again. “...Okay... I think that will probably be okay...” He didn’t realize he was talking out loud. “Honestly the hardest part will probably be acting like I don’t know it’s him,” he mumbled.

“That’s understandable. But you’re a great actor, I must say, so I am certain you’ll be able to do so,” Logan stated, leaving an all-consuming fact out of the conversation. They knew that as soon as they had introduced Virgil to the group, he was able to walk around the mindscape freely like the other three main sides. Before he hadn’t been able to leave a part of the mind where the other sides, who hadn’t yet ‘jumped into reality,’ lived. This, of course, meant that Deceit would be able to do the same after this video.

Virgil moved closer to Roman and nodded again. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, Logan.” He bit his lip slightly. ‘You just have to get through this one video with him,’ he thought firmly. He had not yet realized what Logan had. ‘One video, and you never have to see him again.’

Patton smiled slightly. “Well that settles it then, we can tell Thomas and Joan that the idea is a go!”

Roman pressed a quick kiss to Virgil’s cheek and squeezed his hand before getting up. “I shall inform them and stay there to assist them. You two take care of my dark angel for me!” he said, smiling reassuringly at Virgil before slowly sinking out, wobbling slightly as he tried to keep himself standing on one leg.

‘Virgil, how about we set up a movie?” Logan tried his best to smile as he shoved the incredibly threatening thought to the back of his mind.

Virgil nodded. “Yeah... yeah, let’s watch a movie.”

Patton quickly went over to the TV. “I think I know just the movie we should watch!” He smiled and put on Nightmare Before Christmas. When it started playing, he sat down next to Virgil and pulled him close in a comforting, parental gesture.

Virgil smiled slightly. “Good choice, Pat.”

***

Roman rose up in the middle of Joan and Thomas talking to one another excitedly, both of them falling silent for a moment when he appeared. Joan quickly recovered. “What does he look like?” Roman was taken back a bit. “D-does he really have half a snake face like Logan said?”

Ah. Deceit. Right. “...From what I have heard, he indeed does, but neither me nor Logan have seen him. Virgil is the only one who has.” At the last bit his smile lessened, remembering days he wanted to forget so badly.

Thomas nodded slightly and looked at Joan, then Roman. “Okay... Do you think we should ask Virgil what he looks like?...” He paused, then looked at the look on the prince’s face. “...or just wait? I mean, we’ll see him soon enough, right?” Thomas smiled. “So, script writing. I’m guessing that’s why you’re here, Roman.”

Roman snapped out of his slightly panicked state quickly. “Yes indeed. So I have heard the vague outlines of the episode. Now we need to go into detail first...” He trailed off, seeing how the page visible on the small laptop between them was already halfway filled with script and text. “Ah...” They didn’t need him after all. “I see you’ve made a head start! Wonderful! Let’s see how we can make this a shocker.” He scanned the script, seeing that everything looked basically perfect already.

Thomas smiled. “Roman, my man, I’m so glad you’re back. Joan and I zipped through this script, which was really nice after...” He shook his head. “What I’m saying is, we couldn’t have gotten anywhere near as far in the script as we did without you. Is there anything you think we should add or change when you see it on paper?”

Roman was taken aback by his host complimenting him. “Uh--I uhm. Maybe a few things...” he said, changing a couple of lines on the document. He changed the line “you haven’t seen the last of me” to a lie and watched in utter joy as Joan read over the changes and laughed. “It’s perfect, princey.” After that they ran through the script a few times, Roman slowly forgetting his doubts as they changed a few things as they changed a few things before Roman announced he would go get the others so they could proofread it.

“Alright, thanks Roman!” Thomas smiled and turned to Joan to go over a few of the changes.

***

Patton was smiling at Virgil, who was humming along softly with the song in the movie. He looked over and lit up when he was Roman had reappeared. “Hey, you,” Virgil said happily.

Patton smiled wider. “How’s the script going, kiddo?”

Roman walked over to Virgil quickly to hug him. “The script has already been finished! The three of you now only need to proofread it before we can start filming.” He smiled at Virgil and kissed his cheek.

Logan felt a pit form in his stomach as he realized something. “We need Thomas to summon Deceit so he can read the script and learn his lines as well,” he said, quietly hoping that Virgil wouldn’t react the way he suspected him to. 

Sadly, he did. The other side paled and clung to Roman. “Wait, g-guys...” he stammered nervously. “If Thomas summons Deceit, then... th-then that means he...” Virgil leaned against him and tried to control his breathing. “...He’ll be allowed in the mindscape commons,” he whispered. “We won’t be able to get rid of him...”

Roman felt himself tense up as he hugged Virgil close. “I--we’ll be alright love. We’ll set rules for him and he won’t do anything. Right Logan?” He looked at the logical trait as if searching for help.

Logan just nodded, feeling a pit in his stomach as something in his head screamed at him that the lying trait wouldn’t do so. “We’ll make sure he will. Now, we shouldn’t let Thomas and Joan wait. Are you going to be alright, Virgil?” He looked at the other, knowing very well he wasn’t.

Virgil looked at the floor. “...I’ll be okay,” he lied, holding onto Roman. “You’re right, we shouldn’t keep them waiting. Let’s go.” He rose up with Roman. Patton frowned slightly and followed.

Thomas smiled. “Hey all, we’re ready to read through--are you doing alright, Virgil?” He nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

Roman still hugged him close as they slowly sat down on the couch, taking Virgil onto his lap before addressing both of the confused people in front of them. “You’ll have to summon Deceit so he can learn his lines.” He left out the part about Virgil’s past. About how a few days after his first appearance on the Youtube channel he had come stumbling into the common room, a mark on his cheek telling enough.

Virgil curled into the prince’s side and didn’t look up. Thomas nodded slightly. “I see,” he said softly, guessing that the two of them had some sort of history. “We’ll all be keeping an eye on him. He’ll be here just to learn his parts,” he assured Virgil, who nodded slightly.

And so Roman watched as everybody took a step back and Thomas called out Deceit’s name. 

He appeared like Virgil always had, suddenly, right in front of Thomas. He looked around, utterly confused, before his different coloured eyes focused on Virgil, who seemed to be wanting to crawl into Roman’s side. “Interesting,” he whispered, the  _ s _ hissing out for longer than usual as he looked towards Thomas, who had taken a step back, the new character standing too close and looking too dangerous not to do so.

“Hello, Deceit,” Virgil muttered, gripping Roman’s hand tightly and hoping he wasn’t hurting him.

Thomas quickly recovered. “So this is Deceit?” he said. “We want you to be in the next video with us.” Patton nodded with a friendly smile, though he looked guarded, remembering the look on Virgil’s face when he had first been brought up.

Deceit was taken aback a bit, though quickly recovered as a smirk creeped onto his face, so unlike Thomas that it scared them slightly. “I’m so happy that you want me to be in a video,” he said, the sarcasm clear in his voice. ‘Interesting,’ he thought, looking at how Virgil held onto the prince more as he spilled his lie... Creativity, that’s what this ridiculous-looking man had to be. So then... “Logic! It’s an honour to meet you!” Logic quickly stepped in front of his companion. Morality, of course.

“Roman, Logan, Patton... this is Deceit,” Virgil said, fighting to keep his voice even. He tried to push away the memory of when he realized how bad what had happened to him was, when he came back hurt and Logan and Patton had insisted on helping him immediately. That was when he realized what it felt like to be cared about, even though they had barely started getting to know him...

Patton waved slightly at him and repeated the names, pointing at each person as he said their names.

Deceit nodded and turned towards Thomas again, now seeing another person hiding behind him slightly. “And who is this dashing fella?” he asked, smirking as the stranger flinched slightly at the eye contact. 

“T-that’s my friend, Joan. they came up with the idea for this video and uhm... here’s the script,” he said, pointing at the laptop.

Joan moved out from behind Thomas and slowly walked up to Deceit, studying his face closely. “How in the world is there a reptile in your mind, Thomas?” they asked, smirking.

Virgil scoffed slightly at that, but bit his lip when Deceit turned and glared at him. “What’s so funny, my dear?” he asked darkly. Virgil shook his head.

“...Anyway, the script for the video is here,” Thomas repeated. “If you want to look through it.”

“I’d absolutely love that,” Deceit said, but grabbed the script either way. Everyone around him was silent for the five minutes that his eyes scanned over the script, a smirk growing as he did so. “So I get to upset Virgil and pretend to be his best friend to upset him? That sounds horrific.” He shot Virgil a smirk and saw how the side slightly shifted behind Roman, his eyes looking downwards.

“Acting that out was the idea,” Thomas said, now slightly mad at the new trait.

Virgil cuddled into Roman’s side.

“Then I’ll show up and you’ll leave!” Patton said, his cheer sounding more forced than usual. “Is there anything in here that anyone isn’t comfortable with? We can change it a little to make it easier on you.”

“I ‘hate’ it,” Deceit said, his eyes still trained on Virgil, who seemed to shrink under his stare. ‘Still having that effect on him, I see,’ he thought, his smirk only widening as Thomas asked him to try transforming into Patton to see if it would look good enough. “I’d hate to do so,” he said, already starting to shift. Deceit heard a small whimper as he opened his eyes again, seeing Virgil looking close to tears. He wondered if he... 

“Heya, ‘kiddo’!”

He smirked as Virgil whined and shivered.

“I-I have a suggestion for something we could maybe change,” Virgil said, looking at Roman instead of Patton or Deceit-Patton. “D-d’you think it would make sense if um... ‘Patton’... got the nickname just a little bit wrong? Like because he doesn’t hang out with the others much, and it could give the fans a hint that something was a little off?”

Deceit simply couldn’t wipe the very un-Patton like smirk off his face, knowing very well Virgil was incredibly uncomfortable with him being even remotely like Patton. He turned towards Logan, who looked slightly shocked at the resemblance. “So ‘Logi Bear’ what d’ya think?” he asked, walking towards him quickly before the real Patton grabbed his arm.

“No joking around, remember?” he said, his usually cheery tone seeming forced.

“I think that’s a good idea, Virgil,” Thomas said firmly. “Deceit, you can change back now. It’ll make it easier to tell you and Patton apart.”

Joan was quietly brainstorming possible nicknames for ‘Patton' to say, keeping an eye on Virgil to see what he thought of them. “Buddo, just kid, buddy, friendo...?”

“Anything but the fatherly nicknames. Buddy, friendo and whichever seem decent enough to me,” Roman said, glaring daggers at Deceit as he held the now visibly shaking Virgil, ever so often rubbing his eyes as if trying to hide his tears. They watched as Deceit turned back to his own person again.

“Do I have a room now?” he asked suddenly, making all heads snap towards him, the sides with fearful expressions while Joan and Thomas looked confused.

Patton looked slowly to Virgil, trying to remember if his room had just appeared when he did. “...Yes,” he said very slowly, “I think you do. It’ll start small and plain, and change as you spend more time in it...?” He looked from Virgil to Logan, hoping for confirmation from either the knowledgeable one or the one with experience. Virgil nodded a little.

Deceit looked at Joan and Thomas for a moment before turning towards the now incredibly curious Joan fully. “You do not at all seem interested.”

Joan nodded at him and walked around him slowly, fascinated by the new character. “You look so different... it’s awesome.” They smirked at him and he smirked back. Joan lightly touched Deceit’s shoulder to try and determine what the cape was made of, then pulled their hand back quickly. “Holy fuck you’re ice cold.”

Virgil burrowed closer to Roman, even though he was about as close as he could be. “He really is,” he breathed, so nobody but Roman would be able to hear him. “So cold...”

Patton looked over at him. “You seem kinda tired, kiddo... Do you want to duck back to the commons early so you can sleep?” Virgil hesitated and looked at Deceit, then Roman.

“I’ll come with,” Roman said, his tone almost as cold as Deceit’s touch as he picked up Virgil bridal style, said his goodbyes and shot a glare at Deceit, who just smirked before Roman sank out, Virgil still buried in his arms. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Say hello to everyone's favourite snake!!!!  
> -Ro


	17. Sweet Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning before you read - this chapter is very troubling in content. Please check the most recent tags before reading this chapter

“Dearest, what did he do to you?” Roman asked softly as they appeared in his room. He laid on the bed, Virgil curled on top of his chest.

Virgil hid his face and shook his head slightly. He was terrified that if he started talking, he’d remember things he didn’t want to. He just held onto Roman\s shirt tightly and let the tears start to leak out of his eyes. “P-please don’t make me talk about it,” he whispered.

Roman hugged him as close as he physically could, Virgil’s head resting on his shoulder as his tears slowly soaked through Roman’s shirt. “I do not want to pressure you into doing so in any way love,” he whispered as he ran his hand through Virgil’s hair, knowing that was something that would always calm the other down. His wings spread and slowly wrapped around Virgil as well, trying to make him as warm and comfortable as possible.

Virgil let himself cry quietly a bit before sniffing and wiping his eyes. “I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much, you have no idea...” He relaxed into the touch of his hair and the comfort of being surrounded by Roman’s wings. It made Virgil feel like he was protected from anything.

Roman melted a bit as his still teary and slightly flustered boyfriend said those few words that meant the world to him. “I love you too, my beautiful dark angel. My night sky. My...” His voice turned to barely a whisper now as he moved Virgil up a bit so his head was resting in the crook of Roman’s neck.

Virgil snuggled as close as he could, drinking in the warmth and love and the wonderful cinnamony scent that Roman always carried. He slowly drifted into sleep, lulled by the soothing murmur of Roman giving him as many pet names as possible.

Roman unwrapped his wings from Virgil as he put the blanket over him. Kissing his forehead, he slowly left the room, flying down the hallway in search of something he didn’t want to find, but he did. A simple black door, a few feet away from Virgil’s door, with a small name tag... ‘Deceit.’ 

***

Virgil looked around blearily... where was he? He quickly recognized it though, especially when paired with the smirking figure standing in front of him. “Oh, good morning kitten!” Deceit said in a falsely cheery voice. “How are you?” Virgil whimpered quietly and scooted away slightly.

“Not answering, are we now?” Deceit said, his smirk only growing wider as he leaned over the other and made him face him by forcing his chin up.”Didn’t we establish that not answering is rude, dear?” he asked, his voice now having a dangerous tone to it as he bowed forward more, their faces only a few inches apart.

“I-I’m sorry, sir,” Virgil said, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’m d-doing... I’m doing good, s-sir...” He fought to keep his scared tears from running down his face and bit his lip, hoping he’d obeyed quickly enough that his punishment wouldn’t be too bad. He stayed as quiet as possible and tried to look Deceit in the eye.

“Tch... You really are a lost cause, aren’t you darling?” he said, lifting up his chin with his thumb and pointer finger, their noses almost touching.

Virgil repeated shakily, “I... I’m a lost cause, sir...” At some point, his thought process had stopped being ‘agree so you don’t get hurt’ and had become ‘agree because he’s right.’ Virgil was a stupid, useless, lost cause who deserved to be punished... but Deceit still loved him. He said he loved him, and he wouldn’t lie.

Deceit’s smirk got wider as he leaned in to kiss the other roughly, biting at his bottom lip until it started bleeding. “Now,” he said, pulling back to see Virgil trying to hold back the obvious tears in his eye. A string of blood mixed with saliva hung from his lip. “Let’s see how it’s healing, shall we?” He pulled Virgil’s arm towards himself. ‘MINE’ read the letters engraved into his arm in deep cuts, which had started healing slowly. Deceit grinned at his work. “Shall we then?”

Virgil whimpered and nodded obediently, wondering vaguely what kind of ‘fun’ Deceit planned to have with him. Knives were bad and hurt more than the whips, but being used was somehow worse than the deep cuts to his arms, back, or chest. Even though he had been told if he was good it wouldn’t be as bad, Virgil had learned that it all depended on how Deceit was feeling. “...Yes, sir, we shall begin....”

Deceit smirked, a certain fire Virgil had learned to fear flickering in his eyes as he took a step back. “Strip,” he said simply, and watched how the shaking trait slowly pulled off his shirt and pants, laying on the bed and shaking heavily. ‘So close to perfect,’ Deceit thought. “Now, Virgil dear, as I’ve gotten bored of doing just one fun thing at a time I decided... why not combine them?” he said, an almost childlike expression on his wicked face as he saw Virgil tense up even more.

His face was paper white and he gripped the sheets. Virgil did something he hadn’t done in a very long time--he shook his head at Deceit.

The smirk on his face turned into an angry look. “I beg your pardon?” He snarled. “I know you love when I have fun with you, fucking slut. And I wasn’t asking.” Deceit roughly grabbed Virgil’s head and kissed him, forcing himself onto the other as he grabbed his belt. “On your hands and knees, bitch.” He sat back, watching as Virgil scrambled into the position he had been told to. Pulling the anxious side’s head back by grabbing his hair roughly, he whispered something that sent shivers down the other’s spine. “You’re going to wish you never did that, _Anxiety_.” That was when Deceit hit him with the belt, unbuckling his own at the same time.

Virgil cried out and bit his lip--usually the ‘fun’ was shorter when he was quiet. He soon screamed even louder, however, as he was hit harder with the belt, feeling the buckle cut his skin, and simultaneously felt the dry burn that was almost as if he was being split in two. He gripped the sheets so tightly he thought they might tear, almost shaking too violently to stay in the position he was told to.

Deceit snapped his fingers, Virgil too loud and in too much pain to notice before he felt a sharp pain shooting through his thigh, making his legs finally give in. deceit had stabbed him. The belt stopped for a moment just for Virgil to be pulled back on his knees again by his hair. “What did I tell you about staying in that exact position, you worthless piece of shit?” he growled into Virgil’s ear, moving back before slamming their hips together, while at the same time jolting the belt back down again.

Virgil was crying, trying as hard as he could to stay still. He let out broken sobs whenever the belt hit.

Curled up as small as he could in bed, Virgil was sobbing loudly in his sleep and clutching the blanket as close as he could. “N-no... oh--oh god, please no...” he mumbled through the tears and gasping breaths.

Roman decided to check on Virgil, hoping the other might invite him to cuddle as he opened the door quietly. Virgil was violently sobbing, curled into a ball as he whispered about hurting and not wanting to. Roman rushed over to him quickly, his arms wrapping around Virgil. He gently pulled the sleeping side upwards so he was leaning on his chest, his hands softly rubbing his back. “Virgil, dear, please wake up. It’s just a dream, you’re safe fr--”

“N-no, Deceit, d--” Virgil gasped loudly as he felt a hand on his back--his chest was pressed against something, he wasn’t on his hands and knees, Deceit was going to punish him--his eyes flew open as he stammered out, “I’m s-sorry, sir--” Virgil froze for a second at the shock of a face right in front of his, before he recognized it. “Roman,” he whispered, before dissolving into tears and clinging to the prince like a lifeline. “Ohh god Roman... it’s just you...”

“It’s just me, dear. D-don’t worry, it--I mean  _ he _ won’t hurt you. I’ll make sure he won’t,” he said, tears streaming down his face as he carefully combed through Virgil’s hair, the other seeming to practically melt into him as he did so. “He won’t hurt you,” Roman whispered over and over again, seemingly talking to both Virgil and himself as the other slowly relaxed against his touch.

Virgil pulled away very slightly and slowly tugged his sleeve up his left arm. Hidden underneath layers of scars, barely visible to anyone but him, were the letters that had been carved into his arm. ‘MINE.’ Virgil slowly traced along it with a shaking hand, tears flowing freely. “...I was his,” he whispered. “I wasn’t even someone, just something that belonged to him, for him to... f-for him to p-p-play with...”

Roman clenched his jaw, having to hold himself back from storming towards the newly made door. “W-what did he do to you, Virge? Did he hit you, o-or... worse?” Images of Virgil in incredible pain, him laying half dead on a bed as Deceit did what he pleased flashed before his eyes, which were slowly turning a vivid shade of red. “P-please, I need to know.” ‘...so I can see how much I have to hurt him,’ he thought. He gently rubbed circles into Virgil’s back.

Virgil curled into him and took deep breaths. “W...whatever he wanted... that’s what he did. His favourite ways to have f-fun with me were kn-knives, whips... b-belts, and...” He took in a shivering breath and tried to continue, his voice getting even shakier with each word. “Sssssometimes.... Ropes. He... he liked me to stay st-still... He liked it when I-I just stayed where he p-put me so he... so he could...” Virgil couldn’t make himself say it. He started crying heavily again.

Roman had heard enough, knowing very well what Virgil was about to say. He grabbed the sheets tightly, his knuckles turning white and his eyes now completely red. “Stay here,” he simply said, his voice having an echo to it, placing a quick kiss on Virgil’s lips as he quickly rose off of the bed.

“Roman--” He whipped around, his red eyes simply staring at him for a moment before turning around, flying towards Deceit’s room. Virgil flinched and clung to the blankets as he heard the crash of splintering wood. He stayed frozen on his bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the angst train is firmly back on tracks, choo choo!  
> I'm sorry that I'm being so awful to Virgil now...  
> Mostly sorry  
> Leave any comments you'd like, constructive criticism, screaming at me that I'm a sadist, whatever you feel  
> -Ro


	18. ...Red Eyed Monster

Deceit turned around slowly towards his shattered door. “I’m sure that was so much easier and more convenient than knocki--” His drawling voice and smirk immediately when he saw Roman, his eyes angry and red. “What do you want?!” he hissed, taking a step back.

“For you to hurt as much as he did. For you to suffer in one blow like he did every day. For you to stay the fuck away,” Roman said, slowly creeping closer to the now scared-looking side, who took steps back until he was pressed against the wall behind him. “This looks familiar, doesn’t it, ‘sir’?” Deceit’s eyes went wide as he looked at the knife in Roman’s hand. As he tried to protest, a hand movement from Roman make him whip to the side nailing Deceit down on the bed with an invisible force.

Virgil could hear everything clearly with the doors open. He pulled out his phone and typed a message with shaky hands to Logan. “Plese. Roman dna deceit are fighting, ic ant fo in there to stop iit.  Please Logan hellp”

Deceit looked up at Roman and grinned slightly. If this was happening, it was on. “Do you know the full story, Roman? Did he tell you that he moaned the first time I ever hit him? Or that he could take me all the way down without even gagging? What a little slut...”

Roman’s eyes flashed fully red, even the white of his eyes gone now as he leaned down, gripping the other’s wrists painfully tight. “Open your mouth again and I’ll make you regret ever existing,” he whispered, the echo clear in his voice as his vision flashed red. When he was able to see again, he realized the knife was now impaled into Deceit’s hand. Deceit screamed in pain, which Roman cut off by punching him square in the face, his anger controlling his every move.

Deceit took a deep breath and locked eyes with him.”Y...you must know this already Roman... Haven’t you seen how far he can take a--ohh...” He forced a leering smile through the intense pain. “You haven’t fucked him yet, have you? Haven’t felt his hot, wet mouth working to please you... He’s such a little cockslut, but I guess dear Virgil’s only a whore for my cock...” Deceit braced for the next wave of pain, relishing the anger he’d created.

Roman was completely gone, the words burning in his mind as he let his anger control his movement. This time his vision didn’t clear until someone pulled him away from Deceit. He looked at the man, finally able to see just how he had hurt him. The other wasn’t moving, his eyes rolled up in their sockets, his mouth hanging open, a trail of blood coming out of it. His nose was broken, blood gushing out of that as well. Roman looked at the rest of his body and gagged, burying his head into what he assumed was Patton. 

A second pair of arms slowly wrapped around him, and he heard Patton’s trembling voice. “D-did you see his eyes too, Lo?” he breathed shakily. “I... I’ve never seen that happen before...” Someone made a noise between a whimper and a gag, and led Roman from the room. Patton was shaking slightly.

Roman let himself be led to sit on the couch in the common room, his eyes wide as they slowly changed back to their usual hazel brown colour. The image of Deceit’s body was still etched into Roman’s brain. Blood, so much blood had covered the lying trait, several deep cuts all over his body, his shirt and cape shredded to pieces. The stab wound in his hand had been joined by one near his thigh and a large, deep wound in his shoulder. Now that Roman thought about it, he didn’t know if he was unconscious or...

Patton turned to Logan. “I’m going to check on Virgil,” he said, rushing off. The darker side was hyperventilating, curled up on the bed and looking terrified. Patton quickly sat next to him and took his hands. “Shh, kiddo, it’s okay... just listen to my voice. Breathe in...” He did, shakily. “Good. hold it, then breathe out...” Patton slowly got Virgil calm enough to hold him close. The still shaking side was curled practically in his lap, and he stroked his hair slowly and rocked them gently from side to side. Virgil buried his face in Patton’s chest and tried to only focus on the touch to his hair.

Logan pressed Roman close to his chest both for comfort and to make sure the other wouldn’t rush over to Deceit’s room again... and maybe to comfort himself, to reassure himself that his friend would be alright. “T-try the breathing technique, Roman. O-or maybe sit down.” He wasn’t able to think clearly as he just held his arms wrapped around the other tightly, so very afraid of what would happen if he didn’t.

Roman felt himself calm slowly, his rapid breathing going back to normal after a while and he slumped against the other. “S..sorry,” he whispered, still not quite able to comprehend what had just happened. What he had just done.

Patton came back and sat down. “Virgil’s asleep again, I’m going to check soon to make sure he isn’t having nightmares... but we need to talk about what happened there, Roman.” He folded his slightly shaky hands and looked at him.”Would you two like to sit down for this?” Once they were seated, Patton took a deep breath. “Why did you... do what you did?”

Patton’s voice rang through his ears, the memories flooding back into his brain as he clenched his fists again. “He hurt Virgil. Badly. He--he used him and hit him, h-he--he--” Only when Logan wrapped his arms around him tighter he realized he was crying just at the very thought.

“Breathe,” Patton said softly, fearing his eyes would start to change colour again. “Has...has that happened to you before, Roman? Your eyes were... they were red. Virgil saw it too. Your voice echoed, like when Virgil gets bad. And you didn’t even seem to be able to hear us.”

“”I... n-no it h-hasn’t.” He choked on his own breath, trying not to think about what he had done. Patton leaned a bit closer and Roman shook his head slightly. “H-he, I...”

“Shh... Breathe, Roman.” Patton squeezed his hands gently and moved a little closer. “In... hold... out. You know, like if you’re nervous before going onstage.” He joined Roman and Logan’s embrace, running a hand lightly along the edge of his wings.

Roman shivered, but was quick to lean into the light brush of Patton’s hand against his wings, trying to calm down his breathing while repressing the memories of someone else... Insecurity shredding his clothes off of his body, leaving clawmarks. Insecurity leaving bruises and scabs on his chest and back, hissing in his ear about how the others  _ really  _ felt about him, all the things he truly feared... He clenched his hands into fists, not being able to breathe in the way that Patton coached him to and his eyes flashing between normal and red.

“W-what’s going o--” Virgil walked into the room and froze when he saw Roman’s eyes flickering red. He had no idea how the prince would react to him. Would he believe Deceit, as Virgil so often had? Would he be angry? But the most terrifying part of what had happened was... Roman had reminded him of Deceit for a minute. The flash of his eyes, the mocking and dangerous tone... the joy in the sounds Roman made underneath Deceit’s screams of pain.

As Patton made a sound of recognition Roman looked up slowly, his whole body shivering as he saw Virgil standing in the doorframe looking absolutely terrified. As Roman made eye contact the other seemed to stutter, stumbling back a bit. It was only an inch, but Roman noticed, and he realized he had turned into one of them. The others were afraid of him because he had enjoyed it, knowing it was wrong but doing so anyway. Because he had wanted to make him hurt. Pay. 

“Patton, get him back to bed, okay?” Logan said quietly. “I will stay with Roman.” Virgil didn’t realize he was staring at Roman until he was led away, and didn’t realize tears had been welling in his eyes until the first one to fall was wiped away by a gentle hand.

Logan’s arms unwrapped slowly from behind Roman, who just slumped more as the other turned him around so they sat across from each other. Roman’s wings laid flat as he tried to control his wrecked breathing, eyes wide open. He was afraid if he closed them he’d see him again. That if he did, he’d lose control again. “F-fuck,” he whispered quietly.

“Roman, look at me,” Logan said calmly. “You need to breathe evenly, it will help you remain calm and collected. You also need to realize that Deceit was intentionally provoking you in an attempt to make you snap.” He rested a hand lightly on Roman’s chest. “Deep, slow breaths. He lies, that is his character. He was lying, Roman.”

Roman tried to focus on the hand on his chest, on making it move up and down, taking deep breaths and trying to release them at the pace Logan had picked out to be best, but it was hard. So incredibly hard. “L--d-do y-you have a d-dark side?” he asked, words jumbled between his slightly wrecked breaths that he slowly tried to force them into the pattern the other was trying to help him breathe in.

“...I do,” he said quietly, trying not to tense at the thought, “but I don’t believe it would be beneficial to talk about him at the moment. Just continue breathing, you’re doing an admirable job at staying steady. I can feel your heart rate decreasing slightly, which is good. The excess oxygen in your blood will make you feel more tense and in need to move.”

Roman clenched and unclenched his fists. “I... when I lost control, I-I felt like--like my dark side. Like he--like he was taking over,” he said, feeling a slightly familiar cold on his back, as if someone had just placed their hands there, their incredibly cold hands, and he unconsciously shuffle closer to Logan as if trying to get away from it. His panic started rising again slowly again at the feeling.

“Keep breathing, Roman, calm down,” Logan said softly, holding him, warm hands gently gliding over his wings. “You are not your dark side. You can and will control yourself. I firmly believe that you can.” Logan looked towards Virgil’s room. “...Depending on how Virgil is doing, it may be good for you two to see each other now.”

Roman tensed up at the very thought, so incredibly scared of how this would affect his boyfriend. But he still nodded, slowly rising up and letting Logan lead him towards the door. “Why don’t you check first, to make sure he’s alright, and wants to see me...”

Logan knocked gently and stuck his head in, talking very quietly. After a minute, he nodded to Roman and pushed the door open all the way. 

Virgil was sitting in the middle of his bed cocooned in blankets. Very little was visible except for his tear-streaked face and the hand that Patton was holding, rubbing gently in an attempt at calming and comforting him. “H-hey, Ro...” he whispered.

Roman could have sworn he heard his own heart shatter as he smiled weakly at his boyfriend. “Hey Virge,” he said, his voice cracking and unstable but not feeling like repeating himself. He stood in the doorway, unsure of what he’d be able to do without scaring him. “C-can I... can I come closer?” he asked, his hand twitching as if already trying to reach for the anxious side.

Virgil nodded and gently patted the bed. “You can sit,” he said hoarsely. It was obvious in his voice that he’d been crying hard, as well as from his face. Patton didn’t let go of Virgil’s hand, but shifted from the bed to a chair next to it so Roman could sit next to him.

Roman, with a bit of help from Logan, sat down beside the other, desperately wanting to hug him close but needing to clear up certain things before he did so. “S-so what um... happened... Does it change things? I mean, it’s understandable if you don’t want... us, anymore. Heck I wouldn’t want me near myself if i were you, it’s u-unders-standable if you don’t--” He stopped talking again, only now noticing tears once again streamed down his cheeks.

Virgil looked at him in shock. “I... I thought you...” He took a shaky breath and looked at Patton. “...Th-thought you wouldn’t want me anymore, after hearing f-from Deceit a-and me. Thought you’d look at me and see... see...” Virgil sobbed loudly and clung to Patton, wanting desperately to fling himself into Roman’s arms. “...Thought you’d see me as... u-used, dirty...” He started crying too hard to talk.

Roman’s breath hitched in his throat and, after asking Virgil if it was alright, he carefully wrapped his arms around the other, his wings doing so as well. “I-I would n-never think of y-you that way, d-dear,” he said shakily, but firmly.

Virgil collapsed against him and let out deep, shuddering sobs that very slowly died down until he was just clinging to Roman, trying not to focus on anything but his comforting touch and scent. “He... I-I... He was lying, I didn’t want him, Ro, he forced me...” he stammered in a whisper.

Roman’s broken heart shattered into even more pieces as he held Virgil closer, both of them now crying as the other two sides very quietly excused themselves from the room. “I know dear I know. Y-you wouldn’t do that. W-wouldn’t... say the things h-he said you did,” Roman said. His own thoughts tried to get the best of him, but he violently pushed them away again.

Virgil held him close and felt himself, if not relaxing, shaking less. “I love you,” he whispered. “I love you, I love you so much, and I-I’m not his. I’m yours.” Virgil held onto him tightly.

Roman tensed up once more at the statement, knowing how much that short sentence had hurt Virgil, if not both of them. “You’re your own person, love. Y-you--I want to be with you, but I won’t force you to do anything.” One of his hands was on his back and the other in Virgil’s hair, combing softly through the strands.

What he had said hit Virgil with more force than he thought it would. He sniffed and clung to Roman, leaning up to pepper him with kisses as tears welled in his eyes. “I love you... so much...” he whispered shakily. “I’m so lucky to have you...”

Roman smiled softly and replied in between kisses. “I love you more than there are stars in the sky, dear.” His thumb gently wiped a tear that had spilled from Virgil’s overflowing eyes. “And Dec--... He won’t hurt you ever again. I won’t let him... we, we won’t let him.”

Virgil held him tightly and slowly pulled him until they were lying down, cuddled close. “We won’t let him...” he repeated softly, his grip tightening slightly as if, even though they were pressed against each other, he wanted to get even closer. “And I love you more than there are raindrops in the ocean, Ro...”

Roman hummed lightly as he held Virgil closer, his wings like a blanket wrapping around him, keeping him as close as physically possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe that so many people read this honestly... are you guys okay? Why do you put yourselves through this?  
> Anyway, enjoy, you sadists and masochists  
> And please comment I love to talk with you!  
> -Ro


	19. Aftermath

Patton slowly shut the door behind them and turned to Logan. “Lolo... do you think... everyone is going to be okay?”

Logan looked into Patton’s hopeful eyes, seeing the hurt hidden there. “I think... right now it’s looking like we will all be alright,” he said, Patton’s hand still in his. 

Their little moment of peace was disturbed by a cough coming from a few feet down the hallway. There stood Deceit, leaning against the wall heavily as he tried to make his way somewhere. Blood ran down his temple and his eye was swollen and black.

Patton turned and gasped softly. “Deceit, oh my goodness! Okay, you’re lying back down like, now, and Logan is getting the first aid kit and fixing you up. Not a question, come on.” He held Deceit very carefully around the waist, not sure where he was badly hurt and where not, and led him slowly back to the room.

Deceit repressed the urge to shrink into himself as the other touched him, every inch of his body hurting as he thankfully leaned against the one side that did not fully consider him an enemy. “T-thank you,” he said quietly, noticing very clearly how Logan glared at him before following Patton, now holding a first aid kit. He also noticed how rough the logical trait was while treating the wounds, pressing onto the large gash in his hand from the knife ‘accidentally.’

Patton noticed as well, and pulled Logan away for a second when he saw Deceit wince in pain and Logan’s expression stayed the same. “Lo, look at me...” he whispered. “I know you dislike him, and I understand why, but he doesn’t deserve to be hurt more. Right now he’s not someone who did bad things, he’s just someone who’s hurt.”

Logan’s expression didn’t change for a moment, but then he nodded, finally giving Patton a slightly sad smile. “You’re right. Sorry, dear.” He moved back and continued bandaging the wound. Deceit hissed in pain when Logan disinfected it, but the logical side was now gentle, his hands careful, his face concentrated. When he finished taking care of the wound in his hand, Logan sat up. “Patton, help me remove his clothing so I can see how hurt he is.”

Patton nodded and carefully helped Logan pull away Deceit’s shredded cape and top, gasping softly. “Oh my goodness gracious...”

Logan had to take a step back. Deceit’s entire body was covered in bruises. A few stab wounds on his shoulders and a large open one on his side quickly started to turn the sheets red. “That will need stitching,” he whispered, his eyes widening at the realization that Roman, their snarky but always caring Roman, had done this. ‘Maybe his dark side had taken over after all,’ he thought, but quickly swept that aside as he focused on carefully making sure the lying trait’s wounds were all bandaged and cleaned.

Patton wasn’t sure if he’d be able to sleep after this, but he stayed close in case Logan needed his help, or Deceit needed to grip his hand tightly while Logan worked on some of the particularly bad wounds. He gritted his teeth slightly as the other’s nails dug slightly into his hand but didn’t let go.

Deceit wasn’t able to repress a scream from escaping from his tightly pursed lips as Logan dug a needle into his skin. All of his other wounds had been taken care of, but Logan still needed to do the stitches. His nails unconsciously dug into Patton’s hand as he bit his lip so hard it started bleeding slightly. Logan’s face was one of incredible concentration as he worked the needle through his skin carefully, pulling on the string every so often to make the edges of the wound press close against each other.

Patton rubbed the back of Deceit’s hand gently and tried not to show he was hurting him. “You’re doing great, Deceit, you’re doing so well... Just squeeze my hand, okay? It’s already halfway done, you’ve already made it halfway bud...”

The small praise somehow had an enormous effect on the other, and for a moment he thought he might actually have liked being one of the ‘good guys.’ That, if his mind did not work the way it did, they might have actually been friends... But that moment passes as another shot of pain pierced through his side as Logan got to work again. His nails were probably digging into Patton’s hand, maybe leaving a mark, though at the moment he wasn’t able to rationalize that.

Patton let out a quiet squeak of pain and pushed Deceit’s hair out of his eyes. “C’mon Deceit, breathe. Deep breaths. Even breaths. You can do this. It’s almost done already.” He kept saying comforting, if almost meaningless, phrases and letting deceit grip his hand as tight as he needed to. Patton looked down for a second and reminded himself what the other side was going through, and rubbed his hand.

As soon as Logan was finally done, Deceit let his hand fall from its tight grip on Patton’s, small stings as Logan bandaged his side making him grunt every so often as he turned his head to look at the fatherly trait. Said side looked down at his hand, and as Deceit focused his eyes on it, he was how the palm had four small wounds in it. The blood trickled down it slowly as the lying trait realized that he had caused those little wounds, though as Patton noticed him staring he quickly hid the hand and forced a smile.

Patton gave him a gentle pat with his other hand. “Okay, now that you’re all tidied up you should try to get some rest, alright? We’ll be around, and Logan will come back to check on how you’re healing up later.” He took Logan’s hand and started to pull him to the door.

“Patton?”

He turned around. Deceit held up his hand, palm out. “I’m... I’m not sorry,” he said quietly.

Patton smiled slightly. “It’s okay, bud. Get some sleep if you can.”

As Logan closed the door behind them both, he noticeably slumped, but quickly regained his posture. He quickly rushed the small distance to Patton and examined his hand, quickly making a bandage appear to wrap around his hand carefully after making sure they weren’t infected. “He could’ve been a little more careful, at least,” he mumbled under his breath.

Patton kissed Logan’s cheek softly. “I’m completely fine, and I think he held together remarkably well. He just got stitches without anything to dull the pain and all that resulted was a little scratch on my hand.” He pulled Logan into a hug.

Logan nodded slowly and let his arms wrap around the other, basking in the familiar scent he learned to adore so much. “We’ve tried using numbing medicine before but none of them seem to work on us, as we’re merely sides of a person,” he mumbled into the other’s neck, feeling Patton chuckle lightly as he practically quoted his past self.

“I know Logie, but I’m just saying. He held together pretty well. Come on you, let’s get to bed now... you need to rest.” Patton pecked his lips and led Logan to his room.

Logan let Patton pull them both towards his room, feeling the familiar unusual wave of happiness as he stepped into the room. Patton pecked his lips again softly, though before he could pull away Logan had cupped his face to press their lips together a tad bit longer.

Patton smiled and held him close before slowly pulled away. “Come on Lolo, let’s go to bed.” He cleared a space for them on the bed between the many stuffies and pillows, then curled up, pulling Logan with him.

Logan nodded once more and laid down carefully, stuffed animals and pillows pressed against his back and Patton curled up at his chest. He couldn’t help but say something he had thought about every time he went into the other’s room. “Hey Pat, did you know that sleeping with a lot of pillows is a symptom of depression?” he commented, saying it more like a joke or a simple statement and not at all expecting the reaction he got.

Patton sat up and snatched the closest pillow, throwing it off the bed. He chucked pillow after pillow with tears welling in his eyes until there was only one left. Patton looked at him with a blank smile and forced a laugh. “What a funny fact, Lolo.” He curled up close and buried his face in the other’s chest.

Logan looked at the other in slight shock. He could feel tears slowly seeping through his polo as he wrapped his arms tightly around the other. “Hey, hey Pat it’s alright, you’ll be alright. A-and none of us are perfect. If we were actual human beings, Virgil would have a serious anxiety disorder, Roman would have body issues and possibly even Body Dysmorphic Disorder... a-and I’d have Alexithymia.”

Patton clung to him and took deep breaths. He slowly looked up at Logan’s words. “W-what... what’s alecsy... aleisis... what’s that?” Patton asked softly. What was Logan talking about that he had to deal with?

He chuckled lightly at the mispronunciation and hugged the other closer. “It’s a disorder that makes it hard for me to identify or feel emotions. I had to study and learn the symptoms of what happiness feels like for a long time before being able to understand why I felt that way around you, and later on, the others.” He dragged his hand through the other’s brightly coloured locks, hoping he hadn’t explained it too oddly or vaguely. “I’ve gotten a lot better at it in these past few weeks.”

Patton smiled and kissed Logan softly. “But that... that’s just part of you, Lolo. that’s just who you are, and it’s not bad because it’s you.” He cuddled as close as he could and held him for a while. Then he whispered softly, “Can we get my pillows back? They make me feel safe and comfy...”

Logan now openly laughed, feeling the strange warm knot in his stomach again as he nodded and helped the other position the many pillows around them until there was a small wall of pillows surrounding them. “I must admit, it does feel comfortable,” he said quietly, pressing a kiss on top of the other’s head.

Patton smiled softly and held him closer. “Mhm... you’re better than any amount of pillows to cuddle though, Logie Bear.” He nuzzled his head into the crook of Logan’s neck. “You make me feel the safest.” He yawned quietly and pulled off Logan’s tie so it wouldn’t tighten around his neck as they slept.

Logan’s eyes widened at the new nickname before his cheeks tinted a light pink shade and he stayed still as the other untied his tie, before he took Patton’s cardigan for him and carefully laid both of their glasses on the nightstand. He scooped Patton up in his arms and pressed him close to his chest. “You’re my favourite person in the whole multiverse... puppy.” He innerly cringed as the word left his lips, though Patton seemed to enjoy it.

Patton wasn’t quite sure what a multiverse was, but he barely repressed a squeal at Logan giving him another nickname. “Love you so much Lolo... Have a good sleep, kay?” Patton gave him a very smiley kiss and curled as close as he could, letting his eyes closed.

“You too dear,” he said, not able to repress the stupid grin from overtaking all of his features as he took a deep breath and pulled Patton closer to him, the other now laying on top of him, his legs clinging around Logan’s like a koala, his head resting on the logical trait’s chest. Logan buried his head into the soft strands of his hair as he nuzzled into him a bit more, drifting off to sleep slowly.

Patton let Logan’s warmth and the comforting, even beat of his heart and the movement of his lungs lull him off to sleep. He sighed happily and his body completely relaxed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it bad that this is kind of a lull in angst for this story?  
> ...The answer is yes  
> Make good choices, children  
> -Ro


	20. The Damage Done

As Roman woke up, the whole mindscape was quiet except for small noises of pain coming from right outside the door. He frowned before slowly getting up, his bare torso feeling strangely cold without Virgil’s body pressed against him. 

When he opened the door slowly, there stood Deceit, letting out small whimpers as he heavily leaned against the wall while trying to make his way to the kitchen. His head snapped towards the door when he heard it opening. “What are you looking at?” Deceit hissed softly, but without much venom to his accusation. He stayed still, leaning slightly against the wall.

“I--... let me help you,” Roman said, awkwardly rushing over just to come to a quick stop as the other fell to the ground, covering his head with his arms that were both heavily bruised and wrapped in bandages. “Ah,” Roman said, his wings pressing against his frame in nervousness. “I--Virgil could maybe help you if--if you want or...”  He drifted off, his mind racing. He was unable to identify if he should feel proud or guilty at the fact that he had scared the lying trait this much.

“I would not like any help in getting to the kitchen,” Deceit whispered. “And I would dislike Virgil’s help... that is, unless you plan to hit me for touching him.” He very slowly looked up. “In which case I would most definitely not prefer Patton’s help.”

Virgil woke up slowly, reaching for Roman until he realized he wasn’t there. He sat up and stared at the small crack open in the door, feeling many mixed emotions as he saw the bandages on Deceit’s arms.

Roman felt something similar to guilt pull at his heart and almost felt the need to hug the other, but quickly swiped it from his mind. “I--uhm--no I won’t. And I’ll--I mean he’ll help you right away,” he said, his wings wrapping slightly around his exposed torso as he quickly turned around to call for Virgil. 

The anxious trait got up and moved over to Roman and Deceit, slowly helping him to his feet. “Kitchen?” he asked softly. Deceit shook his head and Virgil helped him limp into the kitchen.

Roman watched them go, seeing how Virgil was unusually stiff and Deceit made sure to only touch Virgil where needed, and now the guilt was undeniable. He had broken them. He had broken every single one of them, making them so much more careful, aware whenever the others looked at him to search for any glimpse of red in his eyes... And he still didn’t feel entirely guilty for what he’d done to Deceit.

Virgil carefully helped Deceit to sit down in a chair. He fiddled with the ends of his sleeves for a minute before the morbidly curious part of him whispered, “how... how badly are you hurt? Where does it hurt?” He sat down in the chair next to Deceit, glancing towards Roman as he left for his room. “...If I may ask...”

Deceit let out a short, humourless laugh and looked Virgil straight in the eye. “Why Virge, you don’t wanna know all the gory details? Or you want to know how many times you won’t have to beat me up before I’ve paid for the stuff I haven’t done?” He lifted his head, his teeth gritted as his sore neck stretched a bit at the movement.

“I... I..” Virgil stared for a moment. “I j-just wanted to know...” he mumbled nervously. In truth, some part of him probably wanted to see how badly Deceit had been hurt, then compare it to the ways and times he’d been hurt. “...Please? But you don’t have to if you don’t want to, I’ll stop asking.”

Deceit hummed and watched the other closely before slowly standing up. “You don’t want me to show you my arms and torso?” he said, rolling up his sleeves slowly to reveal his upper arms, bruises flowing into each other and looking like a sickening galaxy without stars.

Virgil looked at his arms and saw the swirls of angry colours mixed together and cut across by sharp white bandages, most with rust staining them. He bit the inside of his lip. “What... what does your torso look like?” he asked quietly, not sure if deceit would even hear, but it seemed that he did.

“Why don’t I just show you?” he simply said, watching Virgil’s every move as he unbuttoned his shirt, gritting his teeth with every move he made until the shirt fell to the ground, his breathing a bit heavy as he watched the anxious side’s expression become a mixture of repressed guilt and shock. “Don’t like what you see?” he asked, the sharp remark getting slightly lost when his voice broke at Virgil touching a bandage.

He pulled away as soon as he heard the sound, feeling very conflicted. Deceit had done things like this to him... many times. Maybe not this bad all at once, but he still had the scars to remember by. A small part of him felt... felt  _ good  _ that Deceit had to go through this, and he didn’t seem to have any broken bones--except for his nose. The rest of Virgil was appalled that he was at all happy that anyone was hurting this bad. He took a few steps back before running to his room.

Deceit smirked until the other had left the room. His expression fell and he carefully pressed against his ribcage, hissing as the pain from his apparently broken ribs shot through his body like a bullet. “Guess that’s normal,” he muttered as he slowly made his way to the fridge to get himself something to eat. His shirt was still on the floor, but he was already in so much pain he couldn’t imagine if he bent down with all of his aches and stings.

Virgil went back to his bed and hid, deciding to stay there until Deceit had more than enough time to eat and leave the room, grabbing his phone and headphones. He turned his music on loud and shut his eyes to try and distract himself from everything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!  
> And if anyone was curious "how many chapters exactly is this going to be?" well...  
> Your guess is as good as mine. But it will, eventually, end. That I know  
> Feel free to comment! Praise, spelling errors (I don't have a beta reader) whatever you'd like  
> Love ya kiddos -Ro


	21. Good Morning

Roman had been in the shower for almost half an hour, the hot water running down his back and wings, making them heavier. He slowly relaxed, letting them sink and move away from where they’d been pressed against his back tightly. As he turned off the water his mind felt empty. He hummed quietly as he wrapped a towel around his waist. His faint smile faded and was replaced by a light blush when he realized Virgil was in the room.

Virgil looked up, dropping his headphones onto the bed. His face was a similar colour to Roman’s as he tried very hard to focus only on the prince’s face. “Hey Ro...” His eyes wandered down slightly and he bit his lip, going even more red. “H-have a nice shower?...” Virgil bit his lip as his eyes drifted to the very slim but still stunning body in front of him.

Roman stood as still as a statue, wings still spread out slightly as he stared back, aware of every inch, every lump on his body... though the other seemed to enjoy the situation more than he thought he would have. “Enjoying the view, my dark angel?” Fake confidence layered over the words.

Virgil looked up at his face and could see his insecurity. He stood up and moved a bit closer. “...Yes, yes I am, Roman...” Virgil slowly wrapped his arms around the prince’s waist, hands just below where his wings came out. “Although to be honest, I’d like it a touch better if there was a bit more you here.” He very shyly trailed a hand down his chest. “Then it would be easier to see your amazing muscles.” Virgil’s face was dark red as he said all this.

Roman was frozen in place as virgil’s hands moved against his body, knowing very well that there was not much fat to be insecure about, though he did anyway. He pushed the thoughts aside as Virgil’s warm hands trailed down his chest and he laid his arms on the other’s shoulders loosely, ignoring his own bright red face and focusing on the adorable blush that had settled on the other’s face. “Hmmm,” he hummed as his other hand trailed along his wing lightly, resting their foreheads together.

Virgil smiled slightly and gave Roman a quick, soft kiss before holding him close, hiding his face and dark blush against the prince’s shoulder. “I love you, Roman...” he mumbled.

He felt an incredibly warm but pleasant heat spreading through his body at those four simple words, leaning against the wall slightly to hold virgil closer, burying his face into the other’s locks as he mumbled a response. “Love you too, my dark prince.”

After a short while of just leaning against each other and feeling close and happy, Virgil pulled away. “Um... should I leave you now so you can get dressed?” he asked, his blush returning quickly as he shyly fumbled with the ends of his sleeves.

Roman smiled at him and repressed a chuckle. “I’ll just grab my clothes and be off to the bathroom again dear, just stay here and I’ll be out in a minute.” He pressed a soft kiss to the other’s lips, lingering a bit before pulling away. “Though you seem to like me more this way,” he whispered into Virgil’s ear before running to the closet quickly to hide the bright blush that was once again spreading on his face.

Virgil sat down on the bed and hid his face in his hands, feeling his skin heat up more. Once Roman was back in the bathroom, he took a couple breaths to calm himself down. Feeling more collected, Virgil smiled at the realization that Roman seemed to be more confident than before...

As soon as the door closed behind him, Roman slumped, a shiver running down his spine as he looked at himself in the fogged mirror but turning away, getting dressed quietly, his eyes kept on anything that was not reflecting. After he had gotten his new prosthetic attached to his almost completely healed leg, his dressed in a simple white button down and black jeans. He fixed his hair and stepped out of the room once more.

Virgil smiled at the sight of his boyfriend. “Hey there, handsome...” He got up and moved closer again. “You look nice. Very simple elegance, very you--that is, when you’re not going for flamboyantly noticeable.” He grinned and pecked Roman’s cheek. “Anyway, you look good love.”

“Hmm.” Not a denial nor approval as he grabbed the other’s hips lightly. “You still have to get dressed yourself, love. You’ve worn that hoodie for three days and I’m pretty sure those are pj bottoms,” he said, a hint of a smirk on his face as he moved his hands so he was lightly hugging the other.

Virgil glanced down to see that, yep, he was wearing pajama bottoms, and he was fairly sure he’d been wearing the same ones yesterday. He looked back up at Roman and kissed his cheek. “Mhm... I might just steal some of your clothes for today, though.” He smiled a little.

Roman chuckled and held him a bit closer. “I’ll pick something out for you dear,” he said, an idea rising in his head as he smirked at the other, knowing there could be a chance Virgil would end up in a crop top or high heeled boots, but wanting to see how much he was trusted anyway.

Virgil kissed him again, not noticing the smirk. “Sure thing, Ro.” He smiled softly and sat down on the bed. It then crossed his mind that Roman might do something outlandish just because he’d been given the power, but Virgil shrugged it off. He trusted him.

Roman rushed towards his closet, his hand lingering on the few crop tops he owned, but deciding against it and moving to the button downs. After a few minutes he turned around again, handing Virgil his clothes with a wide grin. A simple white t-shirt with a small rainbow flag embroidered on the pocket, a pair of ripped jeans in the incredibly bright royal red colour of his sash. The outfit was finished off with a long black cardigan with sleeves so long he automatically had sweater paws. He smiled brightly at Virgil

He was a little shocked at the white and very bright colour--Virgil wasn’t sure he had anything white in his closet--but he nodded and got off the bed. “Okay, I’ll go change in the bathroom I guess.” He went in to change.

Roman’s smirk faltered slightly as he realized he might’ve pulled Virgil out of his comfort zone, but brushed it off quickly. The other would tell him if something was wrong or he didn’t feel comfortable. He just waited for the other to be done, sitting on the bed with his legs crossed.

Virgil looked in the mirror at himself, adjusting the vest/cardigan, which had made him feel more comfortable with the outfit. He let the long sleeves fall over his hands, only his fingers peeking out of his sweater paws. With a small, shy smile, he went back into the bedroom. “...I kinda feel like I need hipster glasses and a pretentious book to complete this outfit,” he said jokingly.

Roman looked up at the door creaking open and his heart melted a bit. The other stood awkwardly in the doorway, one sweater-paw clutching the hem of his shirt as he jokingly uttered the sentence. “You look wonderful dear,” he whispered as he got up and walked over to the other, his wings fluttering behind him slightly.

Virgil blushed and smiled more, doing a slow turn to let Roman see his full outfit. “Of course you think so, you picked the outfit.” He did, however, feel that he liked it more than he thought he would. “I might have to wear a bit more colour... what are you doing to me?” He giggled shyly and stood on his toes slightly to give Roman a gentle kiss.

Roman smiled into the kiss as he let his hands wander down the soft material of the vest to the small of Virgil’s back. “Hmm... I’m glad you like it love.” Smiling, he took the other’s hand, gently pulling him along towards the door. “What about breakfast, hm? I’ll go wake up the others and you try your best at cooking?” he asked, winking at him as they both knew the other would just warm up the waffles they had laying in one of the cabinets.

“If you trust me not to poison you all,” Virgil teased. He pulled Roman in for another kiss before heading into the kitchen, humming under his breath.

Roman smiled and looked as the other walked along the hallway, cardigan swinging behind him slightly, feet still bare, before he rounded a corner and Roman himself headed to the other rooms. As per usual, he didn’t knock on Patton’s door before entering, barely able to repress a yelp of surprise as he saw Logan and the fatherly trait cuddled up on the bed, both with faint smiles on their faces. He watched them for a moment before softly tapping Patton’s shoulder to wake him up.

Patton nuzzled a bit closer to Logan and sighed happily as he started to wake up. “Mmmorning Lolo...” His eyes opened slowly and he smiled at the prince. “...and morning Roman. Sleep well? What’s up?”

Roman chuckled lightly at the undeniably adorable trait. “We’re making breakfast and it’d be wonderful if you two lovebirds would join us... that is if Virgil doesn’t burn the kitchen down.” He chuckled again, patting the other’s head lightly before leaving to let the two cuddly close sides wake up properly.

Patton giggled and kissed Logan’s cheek. “Lolooo... We’re gonna get up and have breakfast with Roman and Virgil.” He decided he would cuddle Logan awake, but use tickling as a last resort if he stayed asleep.

Logan grumbled and hid his head in Patton’s warm chest, the steady heartbeat calming him down and lulling him right back to sleep... though before he could drift off again he felt hands sneaking down to his sides, fingers wiggling as they reached his sides. He yelped loudly and tried to escape Patton’s tickling attack as he begged him to stop through fits of uncontained laughter. He fell to the floor with a loud thud that made them both quiet down for a moment before they broke out laughing again.

“C’mon Logie bear,” Patton said through his giggles. “We’re going to have breakfast with Roman and Virgil so we should probably get dressed in clothes that aren’t from yesterday.” He got up and helped Logan to his feet, giving him a kiss on each cheek.

Logan smiled softly at the kisses before nodding and going over to Patton’s closet, not feeling the need to go to his own room to pick out clothes. He chose a dark blue sweater, wearing it with a white button up poking out from underneath it. He walked out of the bathroom and smiled at Patton widely.

Patton bounced slightly on his toes. He was wearing a blue button up, open to show a light grey shirt with a cat on it and complete with just some blue jeans. He grabbed Logan’s hand. “Awe, you look so handsome Logie!” He skipped to the kitchen, pulling him along and humming happily.

Logan smiled and let himself be pulled along, frowning as he saw Deceit’s door just closing. He shoved the thoughts aside as he ran after Patton, who was basically jumping in joy as they got to the kitchen where Virgil had, for once, attempted to make eggs and bacon and succeeded.

Virgil smiled at Patton’s excitement, feeling a bit proud of himself as well. “We’re just going to wait a minute for Roman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long! I forgot to post this chapter before I went camping for the weekend. At least it's some sweet sweet fluff to keep you a little happy--which is verrrrrrrry unusual from me but hey we all need to smile sometimes   
> Comment anything you'd like, I love talking to you guys!  
> -Ro


	22. Good Old Memories

Roman knocked on Deceit’s door lightly, a croaky voice telling him to come inside. After he closed the door behind himself, Roman looked up to see Deceit laying in the exact position he had been helped in.

Deceit propped himself up slowly on his elbows, staring at the prince. “What a pleasure to see you, Roman... to what do I owe it?”

Roman scratched the back of his head awkwardly, not wanting to come too close in fear of scaring the other. “We--I mean Virgil is making breakfast and I thought... Maybe you want to join, o-or I-I mean we could bring you something if you don’t?” He cursed his voice for breaking as he watched the other slowly, his yellow eye seeming to give a strange light as Roman felt the room slowly took effect, wanting to leave as soon as possible.

Deceit sat up a bit more, not looking away from him. “I would enjoy coming to eat with you all. Virgil could not bring me some food when you are done.” He laid back down. “Do not stay here as long as you like here,” he muttered.

Roman nodded quickly and muttered a small goodbye before quickly rushing out of the room, closing the door behind himself and visibly relaxing. He only realized as he walked to the kitchen that his wings had been practically glued to his body in nervousness. The thoughts that started clouding his mind as soon as he had set foot into the room faded away slightly at the sight of Virgil snorting at a joke Patton had just made, while Logan just sighed.

Virgil smiled and got up to serve the breakfast onto plates. “Hey you,” he said happily, giving Roman a kiss on the cheek as he set down plates. Patton beamed. “You did a great job at this, kiddo! I’m impressed!”

Logan repressed a chuckle as he quietly took a bite of his food, only to throw his fork down and look at Virgil in disbelief. “YOU made this? This is outstanding Virgil!” Patton laughed and pulled Logan into a hug, making him blush.

Virgil smiled proudly and blushed, looking down to hide his pink cheeks. “Thanks, Logan. I’m glad you like it.” He scooted a little closer to Roman and started eating. He was slightly surprised that it was actually really good.

Patton made an appreciative noise as he ate. “Mmmm!”

Roman looked at them all for a moment and considered telling them he wasn’t hungry, but knowing they would get worried. He carefully put a bit of egg and bacon on his plate, making sure it wouldn’t be too much. He gave Virgil a weak smile before slowly starting to eat, forcing the counter in his head to stop measuring calories. Virgil smiled back and kept eating. He finished quickly and got up to put his dishes in the sink.

Patton cleared his throat slightly. “...Has anyone seen Deceit this morning?” he asked cautiously.

Roman stilled in his movement, but quickly regained himself. “I-I uhm, asked him if he wanted to come eat breakfast, but he said he’d rather Virgil brought him some afterwards,” he said carefully, looking at virgil for any kind of reaction.

Virgil clenched his teeth slightly and nodded. “Guess I’ll get him a plate, then.” He put some more eggs and bacon on a plate, then went over to kiss Roman’s cheek. “Don’t eat more than you can to make us happy, love,” he whispered before heading down to Deceit’s room and knocking, steeling himself. “Hey Deceit? I brought you food...”

Deceit’s head snapped up as he heard Virgil’s voice. He was leaning against the headboard, watching Virgil’s every move closely as the anxious trait walked in: how he didn’t close the door after walking inside, how his shoulders were raised in nervousness, his he avoided eye contact. Deceit let out a short laugh and made a small hand movement, resulting in the door closing loudly behind virgil. He let out a yelp before glaring daggers at him. “What kind of food?” Deceit simply asked.

“Eggs, bacon...” Virgil moved closer to put the plate and cutlery down on his side table before stepping away. He really didn’t want to stay here any longer than he had to. “It’s pretty good, which is shocking since I made it.”

“Hmmm.” Deceit looked at Virgil, not once breaking eye contact before finally looking down to grab his plate. “This is absolutely terrible,” he said, seeing how Virgil repressed a smile, a smirk growing on his own lips.

“...I’m going to leave now. I’ll pick up the plate later.” Virgil tugged at his sleeve.

Deceit watched him start to panic when he turned around and the door wouldn’t open after being slammed shut, watching him turn around with both anger and fear in his eyes.

Virgil yanked the handle once more before turning to a very smug looking Deceit. “Let me out,” he said as evenly as he could while feeling the panic start to build. “Let me l-leave.” Virgil glared to try and counter the quiver in his voice, feeling his brain very slowly start to fog over.

Deceit just smirked and made another swift movement with his hand, pulling Virgil towards him with his arms pressed against his torso as if they were tied there. And Deceit just smirked at him. “...Why don’t you just trust in me, Virge? Go back to the good old days, when everything easier,” he said, knowing very well that his room was taking effect on him.

Virgil squirmed, trying to get away but completely trapped. “It... it wasn’t good...” he stammered, shaking his head slightly. He definitely felt foggy now, and though he knew it was Deceit’s persuasion, he couldn’t fight it for long. “You h-hurt me, didn’t l-listen... Roman listens, Roman loves me. He doesn’t hit m-me... I love him.” The words stumbled out of his mouth as if trying to convince himself.

Deceit shook his head, the smirk still very visible on his face as he pulled the other closer. “Tch, Virgil darling, he will hurt you! You’re too weak to fight against him, so let me help you. Let me--” He pulled him closer, their faces now inches apart. “..get you out of here.” He got up, hiding his pained expression as his sore body stretched slightly. “You didn’t see what he did to me, dear, who knows what he’ll do to you?”

“N-no, he wouldn’t, he won’t, he...” virgil had tears in his eyes. “He... he loves me...” The image of Roman, staring at him with red eyes, settled in his head. “He said... he...” Virgil went limp and looked at Deceit. “You want to get me out of here? To keep me safe?”

Deceit’s smirk grew wider as he saw how the room took over the other’s thoughts. “Hmm, yes dear. I’ll keep you safe and sound. You won’t ever have to worry about him hurting you again. We just have to find a way to our old room, our old home.” He trailed his gloved hand down the other’s cheek and leaned in dangerously close to his lips before whispering into his ear. “That’s what you want, isn’t it my pet?”

Virgil shivered, slipping completely into the control of Deceit’s words. “Yes... yes it is. Your pet, yours. We need to find a way back... how do we get back?”

Deceit held his cheek for a moment. “First lock the door, darling, then we won’t be disturbed.” virgil nodded and locked the door quickly to turn back with slightly glazed over eyes as if he was daydreaming. “Just like I left you, hm? Only the pretty colours on your skin faded,” he said, leaning in so the was only a breath away from the other’s lips. “We’ll change that, won’t we?”

“You... you aren’t going to hurt me, sir? You said you’re saving me, going back to the... the good old days...” Virgil faltered, memories leaking through. His face went pale and he tried to pull away from Deceit, biting his lip. The realization hit that he’d immediately slipped into calling him “sir.”

Deceit’s smirk faltered a bit as his left hand made a grabbing motion, holding Virgil in place. “I won’t hurt you, kitten... But now let’s get you out of those absolutely not horrible clothes for me will you?” His hand now held Virgil’s face with a stern grip, the anxious side whining slightly as the material of the gloves pressed against his jaw forcefully. “Let’s see how many marks you have to remember me by,” he whispered, voice deep and dangerous.

Virgil whimpered and slowly stripped off his clothes while avoiding eye contact. He stiffened as the scars and burns hidden under long clothes started to appear.

Deceit just watched, seeing the many scars, faded but still visible. His now gloveless hands rested on his hips, his unusually sharp nails digging into the skin slightly as he turned them slowly until Virgil’s back was turned to the bed. “Where to start?” he said darkly before taking a step back.

Virgil shivered and shuffled back--or tried to, but the bed was right behind him. He held his arms behind his back to keep the scars he had given himself and the fact that Deceit’s marks had been covered.

Deceit smirked at him as he slowly lifted his hand to caress the other’s cheek once more, his cold skin against the other’s hot cheek feeling almost like it was burning. He lifted his hand slightly and let it come down on Virgil’s cheek, not hard enough to leave a mark but making it red nonetheless. “Ah, I think I know!” he said, voice almost childlike as he focused his energy, a small whip appearing in his hand as he glared at the other darkly. “On the bed, hands against the wall.”

Virgil paled a little and nodded slowly. “Y...yes sir...” He crawled onto the bed and raised his hands. He clenched them slightly to stop himself shaking. Virgil glanced back at Deceit, who was twirling the whip around in his hands. With a small gulp, he turned back and placed his hands on the wall behind the bed.

Deceit smiled and ran his hand down the other’s back, the old scars still visible as he traced them, feeling Virgil tense up at the touch. The whip in his hand rolled around slightly, waiting to be used after so many days. “Do you know why we’re doing this, kitten?” he purred into the other’s ear, the whip slightly pressing against his back.

“B-because... because I’m yours, and everyone needs to see that?” Virgil guessed in a whisper, keeping his hands against the wall and biting his lip.

“Hmm, exactly dear.” Those were the last words he said before the first blow made a deep cut in Virgil’s back. He yelled out in pain as the blood made its way down, covering his lower back as he shook violently. Deceit watched with a sick sort of joy at the other’s pain before lifting his hand again, but just as he was about to bring the whip down again his door exploded open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....I'm sorry  
>  -Ro


	23. Rescue

Virgil stayed as still as a statue, not sure exactly what was happening but not wanting to disobey and get punished more. Someone, he was sure not Deceit because the touch was gentle, pulled him away and held him. “Shh, kiddo, I’ve got you,” he whispered as angry shouting echoed behind them. “Focus on my voice, you’re not going to get hurt any more...” Virgil was shaking heavily.

Patton held him tightly and carried him to stand just behind Roman, who was staring at Deceit with his sword in his hand, shattered pieces of the door surrounding him. “Lolo, you need to help him, mkay?” Patton whispered. Virgil clung to his shirt and whimpered in pain, blood dripping down his back onto the floor. His mind swirled with the words Deceit had said and his own thoughts from before...

Logan growled as his eyes, that had gone strangely dark, flickered back to normal as he rushed towards Virgil, muttering at Roman to take care of Deceit.

Roman let the others leave, though Patton stayed behind. He stood by the door as Roman stalked forward, pinning Deceit to the wall by his throat by his throat and hissing into his ear. “Don’t fucking touch him again or you’re dead,” he snarled before letting him go, red marks left around Deceit’s neck.

Patton slowly led Roman from the room, only pausing to let the prince stop and fix the door. “He. Will never even lay a finger. On Virgil. Again,” Patton muttered through gritted teeth as they headed towards Logan, patching the anxious side up.

Virtigl clung to Logan and sniffed desperately. “I... I wasn’t good enough for sir?” he whispered brokenly, his head still foggy from Deceit’s room.

Logan’s head whipped up and he shared a panicked look with Patton as he slowly bandaged the other’s back, staying silent since he had no idea how he was supposed to respond.

Roman quickly looked up, his eyes flashing red for a nanosecond as he gritted his teeth before slowly walking towards Virgil. “Dear, angel, you don’t have to be anything for that--that snake. He used you and we’ll make sure he’ll never--he--” He choked on his breath as he looked at Virgil’s glossed over eyes, his expression slightly twisting as Logan applied pressure.

Virgil blinked a few times and reached out for Roman’s hands, some of the misty look of his eyes fading. “Ro, you...” He gasped and pulled him closer. “I’m... I’m not his, don’t have to be anything for him?” he whispered uncertainly, remembering something else. “You... you said I’m not his, not even yours... I’m mine, r-right?” The tears moved faster and Patton leaned in to wipe them away gently.

Roman just nodded and smiled, tears now running down both of their faces as he looked at the other. Damaged, some might call him... and others that had a better understanding of reality might call him broken. Roman knelt down next to Logan to be closer to the darker trait, taking his shivering had in his own and rubbing circles on Virgil’s arm with the other. “You-you’re your own person, angel. No one, not h-him, not me, not anyone, can tell you what to do o-or think.”

“I’m not his... I’m not yours, b-but I can give myself to you. I want to share myself with you, Roman...” Logan finished bandaging him and Virgil leaned into the prince, holding him tight. “I love you.”

Roman held the other, incredibly careful not to touch his back as he leaned into the embrace more. “I love you too my dark angel, and... and if you want to share yourself with me I’d be overjoyed. But I won’t force you to do anything my moon.” 

He looked over the other’s shoulder as Logan moved away to sit with Patton, the other immediately wrapping practically his whole body around him as the logical side just blushed and quickly returned the embrace. Patton leaned against Logan and looked at the anxious side clinging to Roman. 

Virgil took a deep breath and held him tighter. The video suddenly loomed in his mind and he shivered and looked up at Roman. “Promise me if he does anything he isn’t supposed to in the video we’ll stop it,” he whispered. “Please, Roman... can you promise?”

Roman just nodded and let the other bury himself deeper into his shoulder, stroking his hair softly as he felt a strange sense of anger rush through him as he thought about what he could’ve done if they’d--he shook his head as if trying to shake the bad thoughts away. The prince whispered into his ear, “I promise on all that is holy, dearest. We will keep you safe.”

Virgil slowly nodded before feeling Thomas calling him. He took a shaky breath and grabbed his hoodie, carefully putting it on. 

“Are you being called as well?” Logan asked. “Perhaps he has decided to film.” Virgil bit the inside of his lip and nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry to the people I've been torturing, but I can't promise that I'm done making Virgil feel miserable...  
> Hey, I'm not pretending to be writing fluff, this is a catastrophe. But there will, eventually, be some more happy  
> Love you all  
> -Ro


	24. Lights, Camera, Action

As they all felt the familiar tug in their bellies they sank down, all of them rising up except Virgil, who appeared the way he normally would. The absence of Deceit numbed Roman’s anger slightly as he took a deep breath and struck his usual pose, flashing a dashing smile at Thomas.

Virgil sat hunched on the stairs and looked at Thomas, who was in fact almost finished setting up the cameras for filming. “Hey guys, are we ready to go?” Thomas looked around. “Huh, only four...” He summoned Deceit, who appeared next to Patton. He squeaked in surprise and shuffled away slightly. “Okay, is everyone good to film now?”

The room got visibly more tense as Deceit appeared, keeping his eyes on Roman. Careful not to get too close to any of them, he waved at Thomas awkwardly, his bruises all covered by either clothing or makeup.

“Shall we then?” Roman asked, his normally charming voice wavering a bit as he glared at the other.

“We shall not,” Deceit said, shifting to look like Patton.

The real Patton shifted a bit awkwardly. “Welp, I’m not on till the end, so I was gonna go make some cookies that we can have after! Can you call me again when I have to come on, Thomas?” With a glance at Virgil, he mouthed to the anxious side, “...or if you need help with him...”

Deceit shifted to stand in Patton’s spot when he had sunk down again. His wounds weren’t visible, but still hurt, though he hid it behind a smirk as the others looked at him. “I am not the first one to pop up?” he said, and Thomas nodded as the others sank down slowly before the filming started.

Virgil did his best to act like Patton was there, instead of who he knew it actually was, as they filmed. He gripped the step he was sitting on while other people were talking and took slow deep breaths to try and keep himself calm. The takes slowly got more and more difficult and requiring more and more tries, but Virgil managed to make it through the first section of the video, until they switched to the theatre. Then, shuddering and pushing his hair out of his eyes, he looked at Thomas. “Can we take a break please? Like, ten minutes maybe, then we can keep going...”

Deceit smirked at him, but was quick to hide it as Patton popped up behind the anxious side and immediately wrapped him up in his arms. Letting out a sigh, Deceit sat in the chair he was assigned to sit on and watched them, his head resting in the palm of his hand, playing with the shifting power in his other hand. Changing it to a crab claw and back again. Making his fingers sharp and looking almost stained black, very ominous and demonic. The last one he let be, waving over at Virgil.

He paled and shut his eyes, focusing on the fatherly trait’s arms around him. After a bit, he pulled away from Patton and went to hold Roman tightly. “I love you,” he mumbled, clinging to him and burrowing his face into the crook of the prince’s neck. “You know that, right?”

Roman nodded quickly. “Of course I do my angel. And I love you as well, with all of my heart.” He let the other cuddle into him more, his hair tickling Roman’s jaw as the prince glared daggers at Deceit, who had quickly shifted his hand back to normal.

“What’s wrong, Virgil?” Thomas’s’ voice rang through the room, making both Roman and Virgil jump in surprise, Deceit just turning around quickly with a smirk on his face.

“Just... just a bit stressed and sore,” he mumbled into Roman’s shoulder. “And my back is really sore, which isn’t helping much. I’m fine though, just...” Virgil kissed Roman’s cheek and pulled away again. “Okay, I’m good to keep filming now... thanks for stopping for me, and sorry.” He tugged his hoodie sleeves.

Thomas gave him a questioning look, but nodded and they all went to their places to start filming again.

As the last ‘act’ finally arrived, Deceit decided to have a little fun, the pet hamster incident simply having to many opportunities not to do so. All it was was a cutting motion across his neck in a single shot, only a few frames long. And suddenly all hell broke loose. He quickly ran to the back of the theatre as Roman charged after him. Virgil was shaking and the real Patton was cradling him in his arms, glaring and looking unusually angry. Thomas only stood on the stage, shocked and confused.

“Keephimawaykeephimawaykeephimaway--” Virgil clung to Patton as Roman and Deceit ran towards the back, towards the booth. He could only hear Deceit tutting over him, saying, “Too bad, my pet...” Flashes of light glinting against knives, one tracing along his neck, not quite cutting in but pressing against the skin...

Patton rubbed his back and shushed him softly, holding Virgil gently but with a fire in his eyes as the others sprinted through the theatre.

Roman finally cornered Deceit, pressing his sword to his throat. The snake’s face looked both shocked and amused, but he planned to change that quickly. “I won’t hesitate. You should know that by now,” the prince said through gritted teeth, his other hand pressing painfully into Deceit’s broken ribs.

Thomas’s voice echoed from the front of the theatre, asking what in the world was happening. Why Roman, who had still looked like Joan until halfway through the chase, was treating Deceit like a criminal.

Virgil sobbed and clung tightly to Patton, unable to tear his eyes away from Roman and Deceit. “No no no no no...”

"So do it,” he whispered. The lying trait smirked through the pain. “Do it then, and let Virgil see what you really are... not a noble prince, but just ruthless, angry, and with a temper that I’m sure your little lover will not be afraid of in any way...” Deceit tilted his head slightly, making the sword press a bit firmer against his neck.

Roman let out a low growl and pressed the sword a tad but further against the other’s neck, small drops of blood beading along the edge of the blade. Deceit gritted his teeth but didn’t stop smirking. With every last ounce of self control Roman pulled back, throwing his sword away with a crash, grasping his own hair to prevent himself from strangling the other. His eyes slowly turned completely red as he yelled for Logan, who was behind him in a flash. He grabbed his arm and sank down with the prince.

Thomas looked very confused. “What--what just happened?”

Patton sat them all on the floor slowly, Deceit still at the far back of the theatre. Thomas sat in front of them, virgil in Patton’s lap. “He--I mean Deceit and Virgil have some history. And Roman--Roman... snapped. He-- we’ve never seen him this angry.” Patton stopped, a shiver running down his spine as they sat there in silence, the only noise being Deceit quietly hissing in the back of the theatre as he bandaged the wound on his neck.

Virgil held tightly onto Patton and didn’t look at Thomas. Their host tilted his head. “Why didn’t you tell me, Virgil? We would have changed things to make you more comfortable...”

Virgil curled up even smaller. “I... I didn’t want to ruin the first video since Roman’s...” He sniffed and tugged Patton as close as he could.

Thomas watched as Virgil shook, looking at Patton and silently asked what Deceit had done. Virgil slowly looked up, seeing Thomas’s concerned face, seeing Deceit at the back of the theatre, alone. “W...where’s Roman?” he asked in a whisper.

“Princey did not at all lose it, making the nerd have to lock him up.”

Virgil jumped slightly, looking up to see Deceit moving closer to them. “W-what do you mean lose it? Not... not like...

“Ah Virgil, you’re so intelligent. Surely you did not see his eyes getting red, or how he inflicted this on me.” He pointed at the wound on his neck as he got closer and closer, still in the form of Patton other than the one reptile like eye peeking out from behind his glasses. Another step closer made the real Patton move Virgil away from him slightly while Thomas shifted uncomfortably.

Virgil gripped Patton’s hoodie wrapped around his shoulders and took a shaky breath in. “His eyes...”

Deceit took another step, Patton moving Virgil behind him, his smile faltering and just glaring at the other. Thomas could feel his anxiety spiking as Virgil was on the verge of a panic attack. “Stop!” the host said, and shockingly Deceit froze immediately. He sighed in annoyance and tried to move, but it seemed as if his feet were glued to the floor.

Virgil slowly looked up. Realizing that Deceit was stuck in place, he let out a quiet sigh and turned to Thomas. “...You won’t let him touch me, right?”

He nodded. “Seems I can stop him in his tracks, so no I won’t let him touch you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And yet another chapter has been posted in which I torture my boys...  
> I'm sorry  
> I'm also sorry about my now incredibly erratic upload schedule, but if I have it written down do you really want to wait a week? Exactly  
> -Ro


	25. Closed Doors and Opening Up

“Breathe slowly,” Logan said quietly as he took the prince to his room, hoping the logic and downplayed emotions would help calm Roman faster. “”You can be better than him, he’s just trying to push you over the edge.”

Roman felt his last bit of self control slip from his shaking fingers as he growled for Logan to get him to his own room, not wanting to hurt him or damage any of the objects in the logical trait’s room. While the effect of Logan’s room normally would have calmed him down, it did not have any effect on him as his eyes turned a dark, blood red colour.

Logan nodded slightly and led Roman to his own room, jumping slightly as the prince slammed the door shut between them. “I am going to stay outside until it has passed, Roman,” he said through the door. “I don’t want you to injure yourself or do something you might regret.”

Roman muttered a strangled “alright” before slipping into complete darkness. His vision was red and blurred and the only thing he was able to do was feel; feel his hands push over shelves, feel books rain down on top of him as he tore some of them to pieces.

Logan winced slightly at the sounds coming from the other side of the door. He knew it would be worse to try and stop him, though, so he just stood leaning against the wall and waited for the sounds of destruction and angry yells to fade.

As roman’s vision went back to normal, he realized he was laying on the floor, shattered pieces of wood, glass, paper, and fabric spread all over his room. “F-fuck,” he muttered as he tried to sit up, realizing he had small paper cuts, larger cuts and even a few larger wounds all over his arms, his wings laying uncomfortably beneath him. “L-Logan?” he whispered, hoping the logical trait was still waiting for him.

Logan opened the door as soon as he heard his name. After quickly looking around the room, he carefully helped Roman onto the bed without getting hurt by any of the sharp debris. “Alright, it doesn’t look like any of these are too serious, most probably don’t even need bandages...” He looked over the prince’s arms once more. “There, done. Is there anything else?” When Roman shook his head, he continued. “Now the question is how under control are you? You don’t want to return to the others and immediately give way to anger again.”

Roman took a deep breath and focused his energy to cover up the wounds. “I’m fine. I won’t do anything as long as he doesn’t.”

Logan nodded. “Three more deep breaths and we shall return to the others.”

Roman nodded and took three slow deep breaths, sitting up more and slowly trying to stand again. “Let’s go,” he said and he looked up at Logan, who nodded and they both sank down.

“If he does, kiddo, I’ll help you out.” The voice of an unusually dangerous sounding Patton rang through the theatre as they took in the scene in front of him. Deceit trying desperately to get his feet off of the ground, Virgil hiding behind Patton, who was glaring daggers at his lookalike while their host looked at them, seemingly stunned. Virgil looked up and smiled softly as Logan and a very under control, if concerned looking, Roman appeared. 

Logan nodded to them and stared at Deceit. “Remember, we informed you that there was a script to be strictly kept to. You will not deviate from it again, understood?”

Deceit grumbled a bit before muttering a small “no.” After a moment of silence, Thomas told Deceit he could move again and the side quickly scurried away to his designated seat. Roman ran over to Virgil, the wings he had made disappear for the video wrapping around him protectively. “I’m sorry my angel,” he whispered as the others talked about what had happened in the background. After a few moments he let go, all of them taking their places again.

Virgil resisted the urge to just cling to Roman and returned to the tech booth. Logan gave Deceit one last firm look before going to stand backstage again. Virgil hugged Patton tightly. “It’ll be over soon ‘n then we can eat those cookies, right?”

As Patton nodded, he sunk down as everyone went back into their original places as they continued, ending the theatre scene soon and then returning to the apartment to film the final bit.

Roman’s eyes trained on ‘Patton’ as he started to act more and more odd like they had written in the script, his brows furrowing as the others delivered their lines.

Virgil’s hands clenched into fists, getting tighter as the scene went on and only relaxing when Patton finally showed up again. He took a deep breath and reminded himself how close they were to the end of filming.

“You’ve seen the last of me...” With that Deceit sunk down and, with a quiet grin, decided to wander through the other’s rooms.

Despite knowing that he was still there, in the mind palace, Virgil felt more relaxed as they filmed the last part of the video. When everyone had finished their lines, they all popped back up to have a quick conversation about the different scenes, minus Deceit. Virgil immediately moved over to Roman and curled into his side as they spoke.

“...So,”  Thomas said quietly as they finished talking. “What did he do to you, Virge?”

Virgil paled slightly and leaned closer to Roman. “He... he--”

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, kiddo,” Patton said softly.

Virgil shook his head a bit and pulled his hoodie off slowly. “...It’ll be easier to show instead of tell...” he whispered, pulling his shirt off and turning to show his back to Thomas.

Thomas took a step back, his hands flying to his mouth as he looked at all the scars, some clearly new, the rest faded but still clearly visible. “H-he did... that? To you?” their host whispered and Virgil could feel Thomas’s anxiety welling up inside of him as he quickly pulled his shirt back on, but not quick enough for him to not notice the many scars on his arms and wrists. As he turned around again, Thomas looked at him and pointed. “May I see?”

Virgil shivered and very slowly pushed his sleeves up, tears starting to form in his eyes. “Th...these...” He could barely bring himself to tell Thomas as his eyes widened more. Virgil took a deep breath, tried not to flinch when he reached forward to touch the marks, and continued. “...These mostly... aren’t from him,” he admitted in a whisper, looking away so he wouldn’t have to see Thomas’s face in reaction to that, although he felt his host’s shock and anxiety low in his chest.

Thomas sat in silence for a moment, looking at Virgil’s arms, their faces, his arms, the tears streaming down Patton’s face, his arm--

“Virge,” he whispered and looked at Roman for approval before pulling the darker trait into a tight hug, careful not to touch his still healing back or other possible wounds. He felt another pair of strong, gentle arms join his as Roman moved closer and, after a bit of hesitation, Logan joined as well. 

“Guys, I-I’m fine...” Virgil gave up trying to convince them quickly as Patton moved into the hug too. He let himself go slightly limp as everyone closely held him. “...It’s the past, I swear...” Virgil whispered, his head leaning on someone’s shoulder. He sniffed and let a few tears fall.

“We’ll make sure it’ll stay in the past, dear,” Roman whispered, somebody’s breath tickling the back of his neck and somebody’s arms on his but none of them let go, wrapping Virgil into a tight four-way embrace.

“We shall do anything in our abilities to not let him hurt you... or any of us,” a gruff voice he thought to be Logan said, somewhere near his right ear. Patton giggled lightly as Roman’s wings wrapped around all of them.

Virgil was curled mostly against Roman, still feeling everyone surrounding hi, but this was one of the few times that sentiment was comforting to him. He nodded slightly. “Thanks, guys...” he mumbled softly.

Patton leaned over and ruffled his hair. “Of course, kiddo.” He smiled, then yelped and jumped to turn around at the sound of a loud crash; Deceit was standing in the kitchen, a glass of water shattered on the floor in front of him. He quickly rushed towards the door, then stood frozen as Thomas said, “stop.”

Virgil moved even closer towards Roman, clinging to his sash. “...You can’t just keep him from moving whenever he’s close by me, Thomas,” he mumbled. “Plus you don’t know what actually happens when you do that.” Patton shifted so he was also between Virgil and Deceit.

“I know that,” Thomas said softly and got out from underneath Roman’s wings, walking towards Deceit and standing in front of him before whispering, “move.” Deceit wobbled slightly as his movement was restored. “Don’t you dare hurt any of them,” Thomas said, his voice dangerously low, his face only a few inches away from the snake-like trait.

“I will,” he whispered back, quickly stepping around the broken glass and going to his room, shutting the door behind him. 

Virgil relaxed against Roman slightly when he was gone. Patton held a cookie out to him. “Here ya go, kiddo,” he said quietly with a smile. Virgil took the cookie and smiled back slightly.

Logan nodded and penned something down in his notebook before looking up, adjusting his glasses before quickly cleaning up the glass shards and liquid on the floor. “It appears that you can control us even more than we can control ourselves or each other,” he said before quickly shapeshifting into the form of Virgil. “Just to test something, Thomas, could you to tell me to reveal myself or something similar?”

“Sure.” Thomas was pretty used to Logan asking him to help confirm experiments. “Uhm, show me who you really are.” They watched as Logan quickly morphed back to himself.”Huh, I wonder if it also has to do with how much control I have over myself.”

“Possibly,” Logan stated, adjusting his glasses and returning back to the others after cleaning up the last bit of glass in the kitchen. “Now if you would excuse me, I have business to attend to,” he said before quickly sinking down, leaving the others a bit startled by his sudden leave.

Virgil leaned into Roman more. Patton quickly smiled at them. “I’m not sure what business he can have right after a video... I’ll go check on him later. Want another cookie, kiddo? Roman?” He held up a plate of cookies.

Roman declined with a smile and a shake of his head, watching both Thomas and Virgil take another cookie and munch on them as he snuggled up to the darker trait more and hugged Thomas sideways. 

“Seriously good cookies, Patton.” Thomas smiled. “I don’t know where your skill in baking comes from.”

Patton smiled and looked away. “Awe, thanks kiddo!”

Virgil finished his cookie and leaned up to kiss Roman’s cheek. “Want to go cuddle in your room?” he asked in a whisper. Roman nodded and after excusing themselves, the couple sank down, leaving Patton and Thomas to sit alone on the floor in the living room. 

“So,” Thomas said, breaking the silence that had fallen over them like a thick blanket. “How are you doing, dad? You’ve been so busy keeping the others safe, I bet it’s tiring.” He shifted closer and laid a hand on his shoulder, seeing how the other slumped as soon as the lovesick sides had left.

Patton let his smile fade and nodded slightly. “Yeah, it kinda is... But Lo is trying hard to help the others and me, which is real sweet of him.” He straightened up a bit more. “And Roman and Virgil have both been getting better, so as long as Deceit doesn’t give too much trouble things should be okay for a while.”

Thomas nodded and smiled sadly at the other; his feelings being directly connected to Patton made it both easier and harder to talk about them with him. “Ya know Pat, the things we said in the video... about you having to be able to express your emotions, happy or not... You know that’s true, right? You--you don’t have to be strong for us,” he said, knowing it might be a bit of a heavy topic but wanting to make sure the other took time for himself as well.

“I know...” Patton looked down and scuffed his foot. “But I... I’ve been having some troubles, so being strong is better for me right now, I think.” He didn’t bring up what had happened last night with him and Logan or the time he’d spent wearing his hoodie.

Thomas stayed silent and invited him into a hug just by opening his arms, and Patton immediately moved in and held him close, Thomas stroking his hair in a  comforting manner. “You don’t have to be strong, Pat. letting feelings out is better than keeping them in, you know that. It’ll be better in the long run.” He didn’t push him much into talking, not wanting him to feel uncomfortable or completely break down.

Patton smiled sadly. “Thanks, kiddo... And I know, and I try not to push it all down. You guys do make me happier, too.” He squeezed slightly before pulling out of the hug. “You should get started on editing so you don’t have to stay up too late, okay? Take care of yourself, and we’ll take care of yourself too.”

Thomas nodded and watched Patton sink down slowly before walking towards the couch and slumping into the cushions completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all Ro has updated once again  
> Look at these children, I almost feel bad for them...  
> Comment down below please! I need validation!  
> (but forreal absolutely comment anything--praise, frustration, typos)  
> -Ro


	26. Damage Undone

Virgil froze when he saw Roman’s room. “Holy crap, what happened?” he asked, immediately realizing what had happened. Roman had gone mad during the video.

Roman froze, it hitting him now just what a destruction he had caused in his room. Even the small framed picture they all had in their room was nowhere to be seen. “I--you don’t have to stay with me. I-if I scare you or you think I can’t keep you safe... even if that’s from myself.” His arm fell from its place around Virgil’s waist.

Virgil shook his head slightly and turned to kiss him softly. “Roman, I understand, and you would never hurt me, I know that...” He looked around and moved closer. “But maybe we could go to my room, since yours is a bit... disorganized at the moment?” Virgil squeezed his hand gently.

Roman smiled and nodded softly, closing the door behind them both and burying the thought that he may not be able to stop himself from harming anyone, including Virgil, if he lost control again. He led the other to Virgil’s room and held the door open with a grand gesture.

Virgil smiled softly and went in, leading Roman after him once he’d closed the door. “Sorry if it’s a little messy, but we can still cuddle.” He picked his way across the floor to the bed and gently pulled Roman down with him. “And anywhere we can cuddle is good for me.”

“Likewise, dear,” Roman said before wrapping his arms around the other’s waist and pulling him closer quickly, pressing a kiss to his cheek before snuggling his head into the darker trait’s shoulder.

Virgil smiled more and held him as close as he could. After a while, he closed his eyes and very softly started humming a song that he could just barely remember. It brought thoughts of calm and security, and he kissed Roman’s forehead gently.

Roman hummed in delight as the other pressed his soft lips against his forehead. “I love you, my dark angel,” he said as he closed his eyes in content, humming along with the song as he pulled the covers over them both.

“I love you too, my princely saviour.” Virgil smiled and played with Roman’s hair, slowly letting his eyes drift closed. He sighed softly, feeling more relaxed than he had in a while. After a while, he stopped humming. “...Hey Roman?...”

Roman shook himself from his half asleep state, smiling as the sunlight in the room made him appear more beautiful than the prince already thought, and he felt himself falling in love all over again. “What is it, dear?”

Virgil bit his lip slightly and asked something he hadn’t let himself before. “...Could I maybe see your leg?” he whispered. He wasn’t sure if it was worry about how it had healed, or wanting to just be close, or morbid curiosity, but now he’d at least asked. “It’s okay if you say no, I understand if you’re not comfortable with that...”

Roman froze for a moment. But squeezed the other’s hand reassuringly. “It’s alright dear, don’t worry. But... it hasn’t healed like a normal wound, as the poison kept it from doing so,” he said before sitting up slowly, taking off the prosthetic and slowly rolling his trouser leg up slowly. The stump became visible. The wound was closed up like any normal one, though it seemed to be held closed by the small, jet-black crystals that continued up his thigh, dotting it like an odd galaxy.

Virgil slowly and hesitantly reached a hand down. He was very careful near the bottom with the most crystals, slowly letting his hand trail up Roman’s leg. “...I think it looks amazing,” he mumbled, glancing up. “Just as perfect as the rest of you is, love.” With a small smile, Virgil kissed his hand and pressed it gently against Roman’s scar.

Roman smiled at him weakly, quickly covering up the pained expression that overtook his face when Virgil touched the crystals. “You’re the best lover one could ever wish for, dearest.” He took Virgil’s hand and pressed a kiss to it as well before pressing one to his lips.

Virgil smiled softly and shook his head. “You’re wrong, my prince... because that would be you.” He cuddled closer, closing his eyes as he nuzzled his head into the crook of Roman’s neck.

Roman shook his head slightly and rested his head on Virgil’s, his hands still in his own to provide comfort and at the same time prevent him from touching his leg again... since the touch had hurt a lot. “You won’t let me win this argument, will you my galaxy?” he asked, chuckling lightly.

“No I will not, my prince.” Virgil smiled and snuggled as close as he could, chests pressed together and legs intertwined. “I love you to the moon and back, you know that? I love you more than I could say.”

Roman chuckled as he pressed the other that little bit closer. “And I love you more than there are stars in the galaxy, dearest.” He closed the gap between them again as he kissed the other, a long kiss, slightly firmer than the one before though still incredibly loving.

Virgil wrapped his arms loosely around Roman’s neck and let out a quiet, happy sigh. His eyes fell closed and he felt like he was surrounded by Roman--his touch, his smell...

Roman hummed into the kiss and moved the other so he was now fully sitting on his lap, not parting their lips as his arms wrapped around Virgil’s waist. His eyes were closed in pure delight as the other’s scent surrounded him, peace washing over him like a warm shower.

Virgil curled up and buried his face in the crook of Roman’s neck. He tensed slightly and clung to the prince’s shirt, but said nothing.

Roman noticed the slight increase in tension and immediately let go. “Are you alright, dear?” he asked, giving the other side space as he practically curled up into himself.

“I’m fine, I’m okay!” Virgil whimpered softly and moved closer, mourning the loss of the touch. “I just... was thinking about... something...” he said quietly. He couldn’t quite look Roman in the eye, despite clinging to him desperately.

“Hmm and what might that be, love?” Roman asked, his arms wrapping around the other’s waist once more, though keeping them loose so he’d be able to pull away at any moment. Though worry quickly took over his mind, he kept his face calm and collected, knowing very well the other would just panic more if he saw that worry.

“Um...” Virgil looked very shy and nervous. “I was thinking about...” He went pink in the face and mumbled something under his breath. The words “want...” “b-but I’m worried” and “Deceit” were audible through the stammering and Virgil buried his face against Roman.

“What was that my angel?” Roman asked, the name of the dark side making him tense up a bit. “You know I won’t be mad at whatever you tell me, right? I’d never want to see you upset like that.” He squeezed the arm lightly in comfort.

Virgil nodded slightly and tried to press even closer. “I... i was wondering if you... if you thought we should get more physical,” he said quietly, holding back from spilling all his worries about it again.

Roman was taken aback a bit, a blush quickly taking over his face as he stayed silent for a moment. “In what way exactly, my moon and stars?” he asked, once again pulling Virgil a tad bit closer so they were now back in the position they had started in, faces inches apart.

“I, u-um...” Virgil felt uncertain if there was a correct answer he was supposed to say, especially after the pause. “However you like,” he said quietly.

“It was your offer, darling. You lead the way,” Roman said, being torn between loving to see his beloved this flustered and hating to embarrass him as he patiently waited for the other to make a move, his hands still on the darker trait’s hips, both of their chests almost touching and both of their faces resembling a tomato more than anything.

Virgil was slightly shocked at that. Deceit never--but this wasn’t Deceit. It was Roman, who loved him and wanted him to be happy and safe. With that thought, Virgil grabbed his face and kissed him deeply, eyes closing. He pulled Roman as close as possible.

Roman hummed and pressed the other as close as physically possible, tilting his head slightly to deepen the kiss a bit more, parting for a moment for them to catch their breath before starting over again. He was careful not to do anything the other did not fully consent to, simply enjoying the sensation, the touch, the smell.

After a few minutes, Virgil slowly let his hands slide down Roman’s chest, feeling shy, unsure, and inexperienced. He felt all the defined muscles along Roman’s chest as his hands moved lower, and he was careful not to let his hands drift too low.

Roman let out a low growl, muffled by their lips, still hungry for more as his hand pressed into the other’s back a bit more, tangled in the dark purple fabric of his shirt.

All thoughts about previous encounters with his dark side washing away and he felt safe, warm in Roman’s arms. His hands were rested on his lower back while Virgil explored the prince’s perfect chest and stomach. He slowly slipped his hands under the hem of Roman’s top. “Is this okay, baby?” he whispered into his mouth, not wanting to pull away. One hand rested on Roman’s hip, while the other tugged gently at the bottom of his shirt while waiting for confirmation.

Roman nodded and shivered as the other slipped his hands underneath the plain white shirt the prince was wearing. Hands were cold but soft as the kiss was deepened a bit more, Roman not completely sure where to put his hands. He tugged gently at the back of Virgil’s shirt. “May I as well?” he asked in between breaths before reattaching their lips.

Virgil was slightly taken aback at the request, smiling slightly. It made him feel cared about. “Yes... go ahead...” He arched his back slightly as Roman’s warm hands slid across his bare skin and hummed softly, not sure if he wanted to move closer to Roman or lean into the gentle touch.

Roman slid his hands over the other’s bare back, bringing up the shirt with it slightly, scars littering the smooth skin making him frown slightly and move to a part that had not been touched by the lying trait, tracing his sides while slightly pressing himself against the other, the closeness comforting as he enjoyed the touch of his lover.

Virgil’s breath hitched when Roman skimmed over his scars, then he melted into the touch as his hands moved to his untouched skin. He sighed happily into the kiss and tugged on Roman’s shirt again. “Can this come off?”

Roman just nodded and their lips detached for a moment as the fabric was pulled over his head. Suddenly feeling very visible, he quickly dove back into the kiss to distract himself, tugging at Virgil’s shirt once more in a silent question for him to do the same, his own, now exposed chest taking in sharp breaths as the other’s fingers trailed over the exposed skin.

Virgil whispered an agreement and his shirt came off. He fidgeted slightly as all the blemishes and scars on his chest were exposed, and he looked away shyly.

“Beautiful,” Roman whispered before taking his face in his hands and kissing him softly. The scars weren’t pretty, of course they weren’t, though Virgil himself was so much more than perfect. Hands wandered from Virgil’s face to his back and chest, tracing his spine lightly with his fingertips.

Virgil blushed lightly and shivered at the gentle touch as Roman explored his body. He tried to let himself be open to his lover and his own hands moved over Roman’s sides and chest slowly. “...So are you,” he whispered into the kiss.

Roman hummed very softly. He parted their lips before moving to the other’s neck to press a kiss to it lightly. “...Okay?” Still so incredibly careful not to hurt the other, who stayed completely still. Roman’s lips hovered moments away from Virgil’s slightly shivering body, one hand on his lower back as the other trailed his shoulder.

Virgil let out a soft gasp when Roman first moved down to his neck. “O-okay...” Virgil tilted his head to the side to bare more of his neck to Roman. “...More than okay, mm...” He pulled his boyfriend even closer.

Roman smiled at the response and sucked lightly on the skin, wanting to see what responses he could get from the other, pulling him closer so their chests pressed together lightly.

Virgil’s face went red and he gasped again, moaning softly. “R-roman...” He clung to the prince’s shoulders and bit his lip. “I... mmm!... S-sensitive,” he managed to gasp out, shivering slightly.

Roman chuckled as he sucked slightly harder on the skin before letting go. “I can see that love. Is it enjoyable as well?” A smirk appeared on his face, seeming to forget the blush that had been on his own face recently as his hand trailed over the red mark that was now visible on the other’s neck. The normally cold room suddenly seemed incredibly hot while his hands roamed over the other’s upper half.

Virgil moaned and nodded quickly. He had one hand resting on the back of Roman’s head, the other holding onto the prince’s upper arm. “R-roman...” he whispered breathily, arching into his touch again. “What do you want?” Virgil’s face was so very hot as he entangled their legs to pull Roman even closer.

Roman chuckled once more at the movement, eyes half lidded and dark with lust as he looked at the other. “Whatever you yourself want dear. Your call is my command.” He wanted, no, needed more, but he wasn’t going to rush the other into anything he did not desire to do as well.

Virgil shivered at the slightly dark tone to both Roman’s voice and his laugh. “I-I want... I want more... want you...” he whispered. “Please, I...” He kissed Roman needily and pressed himself against his lover, feeling the heat coming off of both of them.

Roman growled into the kiss, tilting his head to deepen it while his hands flew over the other’s back, arms, chest, until they settled on his hips, tugging slightly at his pants. “Terribly hot in here, isn’t it? A few. Less layers. Wouldn’t. Hurt anybody. Would they?” The last part was said between quick but deep kisses as he watched the other’s every move.

“I-I absolutely agree...” Virgil arched his hips slightly and nodded, trying to calm the spike of anxiety as he slowly tugged off his jeans. “But it’s only fair that you do as well... please?” He brought his hands down slowly to rest on Roman’s hips.

“Mmm of course dear,” Roman said, not letting any doubts get the best of him and undoing his trousers, pushing them down quickly afterwards before resettling his hands on the other’s hips, softly caressing his now exposed legs while their lips tangled together once more. His breath hitched at every little touch the other blessed his with as Roman slowly laid down on the bed. Virgil leaned over him, uncertainty in his eyes as Roman hoped his boyfriend was comfortable and enjoying this.

Virgil looked down at him. He fidgeted slightly, feeling unsure and a little uncomfortable in what he felt was a more dominant and controlling position--but he couldn’t ask Roman to switch, what about his leg? No, Virgil could do this. He leaned down to kiss him again and curled his hands into fists.

Roman noticed the slight tremble, the moment of hesitation, and moved away from the kiss, their foreheads pressed together. “You know we can switch if you want to, right love? I’ll be fine, don’t worry about me. Right now is about you,” he said, followed by another longing kiss, hands sliding down but making sure not to go too far as he waited for Virgil to say something.

“Are you sure? But your leg...” Virgil mumbled, but to be honest he did think that would be much easier for him. He gave a slight nod and got off Roman’s lap. “As long as you’re sure...” Virgil whispered to him. “If your leg... anything, we can move again.”

“I’ll be alright, dearest,” he said, his voice still low as the slowly moved so he was now towering above the other, leaning in to kiss him hungrily, chests pressed together. Everything felt so hot and too much but he still wanted more and more. His hand dipped into the other’s waistband once again, not going too far down but still so incredibly close, his breath hitching as Virgil’s hands glided over his back, scraping it slightly with his nails.

Virgil moaned quietly, his hips rolling against Roman’s. “Please...” he mumbled against his lips before nipping the bottom one gently. “I-I want... please Ro...” Virgil tugged gently at Roman’s waistband before letting his hands slide up his back and shoulders. He arched his back slightly and whispered another breathy “please.”

Roman just let out a muffled moan as he slowly slid off his remaining clothing, not able to make humorous statements anymore. His vision clouded with lust as he watched Virgil closely, tugging at the other’s waistband as their lips tangled together once more, breathless but still craving more as his arms trembled very slightly underneath his own weight. He rolled his now bare hips against the other’s as he opened his mouth, another breathy moan escaping from his lips.

Virgil gasped and moaned, clinging to him. “Roman, I...” He let out a shaky breath. “I want--ahh... think I want to t-try...” He shifted slightly and bit his lip before tugging Roman down and pressing up against him. “L-let’s just do it,” he whispered.

“Okay, love,” Roman said and kissed him again, sucking at his lower lip lightly before lifting himself up slightly. “What do you want to do dear?” he asked, knowing very well what the other was begging for but wanting to be absolutely certain before doing anything, his hands stroking Virgil’s thigh, never getting too close.

Virgil arched his back slightly. “I want you t-to... want...” He whimpered quietly and tried to gently pull Roman back closer. “...Want you to fuck me,” Virgil mumbled, his face going red. “Please Roman...”

The princely trait didn’t say a word, just eased Virgil’s boxers down as he closed his eyes for a second, a small bottle appearing in his right hand. He flipped the cap and squirted some of the contents onto his fingers, looking at Virgil with a questioning look, eyes half lidded and faces only a moment away from the other as he bent down, hand tracing the dip of his lower back. “Alright?”

He nodded slightly and took a slow breath, forcing himself to stay relaxed as Roman gently pushed a finger in. “K-kiss me, please,” Virgil mumbled. He held onto Roman tightly. This was someone who cared about him, who wasn’t going to hurt him or do anything he knew Virgil didn’t want...

Roman moved up to kiss him gently, his finger slowly working in and out of the other. The kiss paired with the heated motion seemed unusual, but as Virgil seemed to find comfort in it Roman stayed that way as he continued for a minute. “I’m going to add another, alright dearest?” he said lowly, everything now revolving around pleasing his lover, making him feel safe. And he could not be happier about it as he kissed him once more, despite the slightly awkward position.

Virgil nodded slightly and made a noise of agreement, gaping and moaning softly as the stretch increased a bit. He squirmed slightly and clung to Roman. “M-mmn...” After a minute, Virgil pushed back a little and murmured, “A-another, I’m ready for another...”

Roman just nodded, adding another finger as Virgil moaned louder now. The noise alone sent shivers of arousal down his spine as he moved his fingers quicker, pulling them out completely after Virgil tried to push himself back more. “Are you ready dear? This may hurt a little bit,” he said, shivering once more as he slid on a condom and adjusting their position. Virgil was now laying on his back on the soft duvet with Roman kneeling before him, kissing him once more before asking again, “ready?”

Virgil took a deep breath after parting from the kiss and nodded. “Ready... just please go slow?” he said softly. He held gently around Roman’s neck and gasped loudly as he started to push in. “I-I--mnn!...” Virgil whimpered very quietly.

Roman stopped his movement with great willpower, Virgil clenching around him making him moan quietly but not wanting to hurt the other. So he stopped, waiting for him to adjust and bending down slightly, kissing his lips that were still parted in either a silent moan or scream.

Virgil shivered slightly and opened his eyes halfway, a bit confused. “...W-why did you stop?...” he whispered. “Did... did you change your mind?” He ran his hands slowly down Roman’s arms, trying to relax.

Roman panted slightly, trying to get his breathing under control. “I don’t want to hurt you. Y-you say once you feel like we can continue, alright?” His arms shivered underneath his own weight and the need to satisfy himself, but he waited, looking at the other’s face in search of any expressions of pain or discomfort.

Virgil pulled him down for a deep, loving kiss. Roman always cared for him in ways nobody had before. After a minute, he nodded slowly and pulled away just enough to speak. “I-I’m ready, Roman, you can move.” And then, just before he did, Virgil leaned up and brushed their lips together again, just briefly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” And with that, Roman pressed himself fully inside the other, the two of them now flush together as a soft moan spilled from his lips. “F-fuck, Virge,” he whispered and looked at the other below him, eyes half lidded, head thrown back and legs wrapped around Roman’s torso as he pulled out slowly before starting to thrust at a slow, steady pace. The speed was both torture and a blessing to him.

Virgil moaned softly, arching his back slightly and holding Roman tighter. “Ohh, y-you can go faster, please please...” he said quietly, biting his lip to muffle another moan. “Mmnn!... Roman...”

Roman held onto Virgil while starting to thrust harder, hair falling into his face while he looked at the blissful sight beneath him: Virgil parted as moans spilled out of his mouth, eyes half lidded and hair everywhere, half of it sweeping over his forehead. Roman moaned as he sped up, moaning his boyfriend’s name as Virgil clenched around him and let out a scream.

“Roman, Roman, Roman...” he moaned, clinging to him. He couldn’t see, feel, hear anything else, just Roman holding him and feeling  _ so fucking good _ . “Ple--aahh!” Virgil’s request turned into a scream of pleasure as his lover brushed against that one spot inside him again.

Roman let out a low growl as he felt a knot building up inside of him, thrusts getting faster and falling slightly out of rhythm as he made sure to hit the other’s prostate with every roll of his hips, bowing down to suck at the sensitive skin on Virgil’s neck harshly, muffling his own moans as he did so.

Virgil tilted his head to the side and got even louder, shivering slightly and gripping Roman tighter. “Oh my god Ro, I--” He stumbled over words and moaned loudly as Roman found a particular spot on his neck. “Ro, I-I think ‘m... I’m getting close...”

Roman looked at the other’s neck that was sprinkled with red and purple dots. “M-me too--ahh...” He shifted slightly so he was able to hit the other’s prostate with every thrust, driving himself deeper and pushing both of them closer to the edge.

Virgil shivered and shut his eyes tight, gasping quietly between moans. “I-I... Ro, I’m gonna...” he managed to stammer out before screaming as he released all over his chest, moaning Roman’s name loudly.

The sight, the sound and the incredible feeling sent Roman over the edge soon after, throwing his head back as he rode them both through their orgasms. He pulled out and threw away the condom after almost falling on top of Virgil, getting up slowly to get a towel and clean the other up, slipping a couple times on his one leg.

Virgil panted softly, melting against the bed. He looked lovingly up as Roman took care of him and pulled the prince down for a soft kiss. “...I love you so much, Ro...” he whispered, pulling him down gently and holding him close. Virgil rested his head against Roman’s chest as his eyes drifted shut.

Roman smiled weakly as he turned them around, Virgil helping so he was on top, cuddling against his chest. Virgil pulled the blanket over them and kissed Roman’s cheek. “I love you,” he whispered again before falling asleep  curled up on top of the prince, relaxed by his warmth and familiar smell.

Roman combed through the other’s surprisingly soft hair, staring at the ceiling as Virgil slept peacefully. The room’s effect seemed to slowly creep up on top of him and he was unable to sleep. The heavy weight and warmth on top of him seemed to comfort him, but not enough to lull him off to sleep as he watched the other sleep. The red marks on his neck seemed to be brighter on his very pale skin.

Virgil nuzzled his head against Roman’s chest and smiled softly, mumbling his name with a soft smile. His hand curled into a fist resting on his chest and sighed happily.

Roman smiled a small smile as the other mumbled in his sleep, small nothings and his own name drifting towards him. The ceiling seemed to light up with small stars as if it showed the night sky as he wrapped his arms tighter around the other, the familiar scent and comforting warmth lulling him to sleep at last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The bois be gettin' it on ;) ;) ;)
> 
> I'm sorry  
> For saying that, not for the smut  
> -Ro


	27. Checkup

Virgil woke up slowly, automatically cuddling closer to Roman. He opened his eyes and smiled at how at peace he looked. Very careful not to disturb him, Virgil got off the bed and quietly padded into the kitchen, turning on the coffee maker. He hummed softly as he moved around the kitchen.

Roman opened his eyes as soon as Virgil left the room, hissing slightly as he tried to get up, his leg hurting even more. The crystals had spread, now covering half of what remained of his leg instead of just the wound. Every step hurt as the prosthetic caught against them. He walked towards the kitchen, a soft smile spreading across his face as he was Virgil practically dancing around the kitchen, humming lighthearted songs as he did so.

Virgil turned around and smiled brightly. Moving closer, he hummed happily and kissed Roman’s cheek. “Good morning my love... coffee?” He held out a cup.

Roman nodded and smiled at him while he pecked his cheek, taking the cup he hid a small growl as more pain shot through his leg but distracting himself by taking a sip of coffee. “That’s wonderful, dear. You make the best coffee, I’m surprised!” He chuckled as he placed his hands on the other’s waist gently.

Virgil smiled and pulled his sleeves over his hands. “I’m pretty sure the coffee machine makes it the same way no matter who makes it,” he teased gently, snuggling against him. “Would you like anything to eat?” he asked softly. “I can make breakfast.”

“A bit of yogurt will do, dear,” he said, not wanting to worry the other but not feeling ready for a full meal yet. He walked to the kitchen, fluttering his wings slightly to try and put as little pressure as possible on his leg as he did so.

Virgil nodded before frowning slightly. “...Is your leg hurting again? You’re walking a bit oddly.” He helped Roman sit at the table and went to get him a bowl of yogurt, putting some bread in the toaster for himself.

Roman watched him move around the kitchen again, the long-sleeved shirt and messy hair looking both adorable and incredibly attractive on him. “It’s fine love, don’t worry about me,” he said, a soft smile settling on his face and softening his features as Virgil turned around again, now with a plate of toast and a small bowl of yogurt in his hands.

Virgil kissed Roman’s cheek as he set the food down on the table. “I will worry about you, my prince. You can’t stop me.” He grinned and got the jelly jar, setting it down next to the food and handing Roman a spoon. “Your sword, sire,” Virgil giggled, sitting next to him.

“Thank you, Your Majesty,” he said and gave Virgil a quick peck on the cheek before taking a small amount of yogurt onto his spoon. “Yaknow it’s odd that the others aren’t awake yet,” he said, trying to procrastinate eating and wanting to watch the other longer as he unscrewed the lid from the jelly jar.

“A bit odd, huh?” Virgil smiled softly and spread jelly on his toast. “Guess it just means we can have some more quality us time.” He took Roman’s hand and gave him a fond look before taking a bite of his toast.

Roman smiled back before taking the spoon into his mouth and squeezing the other’s hand lightly. The sight of his boyfriend sent butterflies to his stomach as he was feeling them for the very first time. The peaceful silence in the room was disturbed by two pairs of feet patting down the hallway, the door creaking open to reveal a sleepy-looking Patton pulling Logan, who looked everything but professional, along by the hand.

“Good morning you two.” Virgil smiled slightly at the sight. “There’s coffee already made,” he stage whispered to Patton, who nodded and led Logan over, pouring him a cup. “How did you two sleep?” Virgil asked before taking another bite.

“Well it was hard to sleep at first, as it was surprisingly noisy.” Logan shot them a glare and Roman turned bright red, quickly shoving some more yogurt into his mouth. “But after that we slept fine. I have to say I prefer Patton’s room over mine... and his presence of course.” The last part was whispered afterwards as Patton wrapped his arms around him and nuzzled his head into the logical trait’s neck.

Virgil almost choked on his toast. Fuck. he hadn’t thought about the others... He avoided looking at them and tugged his hoodie closer to him, making sure it hid the marks on his neck.

“Aww look, he’s embarrassed Lo!” Patton chuckled while Roman tried to stand up to comfort Virgil, sitting back with a slight hiss as a shot of pain went through his leg. 

“As if you two haven’t done anything yet!” he said quickly, trying to divert the attention from it and smirking as Logan went red.

Virgil was not distracted. He ignored Patton’s embarrassed stammering and shifted closer. “Ro, you did it again... What’s wrong with your leg?” He bit his lip. “You can’t just pretend it’s fine if you’re hurting...”

“Nothing to worry about dear. Just-- a little sting, nothing else,” he said, unconsciously pulling his rolled up trouser leg a bit further over the already fully covered stump, the crystals scratching against it slightly as he vaguely realized that they had moved way higher than he first thought. Roman let go quickly as he realized the others were all staring at him.

“You should let Logan check it then, just to be safe,” Virgil said softly, moving closer. “It could be nothing, but what if it isn’t? I don’t want you to get worse, baby...”

“I won’t, angel,” he said, taking the other’s hand and lacing them together above the table. Logan quickly recovered from his embarrassment and led Patton to their places, glancing at the other two for a moment, not having heard their conversation before his own name was brought up.

Virgil looked at him with worried eyes and slowly started eating again.

Patton ate his cereal and hummed under his breath. “So what do you wanna do today kiddos?” he asked, momentarily setting down his cereal as he looked at them, a childlike cheerfulness in his eyes. Logan just smiled fondly while taking a sip of coffee.

Virgil shrugged slightly and looked at Roman. “You have any ideas, Ro?” he asked lightly, putting a hand on his leg.

“We could play some games, or go on a walk in the imagination? Thomas is editing his video at the moment so I don’t think he’ll be needing us,” he said, chuckling at Patton who was now playing chair for an incredibly embarrassed Logan.

“A walk sounds nice to me,” Virgil said quietly, a small smile on his face. He scooted a little closer to Roman.

Patton nodded as well. “Would be nice!”

“Then we shall do that once you’re ready!” Roman said, a smile plastered on his lips. “While you two get yourselves ready, I want to as Logan for a favour, to check on the prosthetic and possibly adjust it a bit.” He eyed Logan to see if that was fine with the other.

Logan nodded slightly as Virgil smiled and started to clear the table. “Is there anything wrong, or would you just like me to check it?”

Roman didn’t say anything, just gave him a look that the other seemed to understand. He stayed quiet until they left the common room and the door closed behind him. Roman sat on the bed as he rolled up his trouser leg, letting out a soft hiss as he loosened the prosthetic and the crystalized wound came into sight.

Logan kneeled next to him. “This... is worrying, to say the least. Is it painful?” He gently touched one, wondering if it was like a scab that would come off, or something much worse.

Roman took in a sharp breath as the other’s fingers made contact with the crystals, repressing the urge to scream in both pain and horror as he say two small black dots appearing, stabbing their way through his skin until two other crystals appeared. “...I suppose that answers your question?” he said, letting out a short, humourless laugh as Logan looked at the two new crystals closely. “I-if you need one to... yaknow, for research, we can try to get one off.”

Logan nodded slightly. “I would like to... especially as I am now concerned with the fact that more are appearing.” He grabbed a tissue and set it aside. “Tell me if you need me to stop.”

Roman just nodded and waited for the other to take out everything necessary, slightly frightened by what he might find to be useful. He watched the new crystals grow, stretching the small hole they were forcing through his skin.

Logan gripped one of the crystals, a smaller one that didn’t appear to be growing, and pulled. It made a cracking sound as it came out. Logan placed it on a tissue and grabbed a bandage, checking to see if it was bleeding where he’d pulled it out.

Roman gritted his teeth, the pain shooting like a bullet through his leg. But as Logan went to check if it was bleeding, the only thing he found was another crystal that had already grown underneath the one he had pulled out. “...Heh..” Roman mumbled, not entirely sure how to react as Logan wrapped the crystal in the tissue.

Logan sat next to him. “I have a couple questions...” He pulled out a notebook and a pen. “Clearly it hurt when I pulled out the crystal... does that spot still hurt? Does pressure on the crystals hurt you? When did the first ones appear? And when did they start to spread?”

Roman tried to focus as he answered the questions carefully. “The spot doesn't hurt anymore, which I guess is odd. Pressure does indeed hurt, including when I walk, with the prosthetic... The first one... I’m not sure, as I’ve had the bandages on for about a week.when I took them off there were a small amount of them only around the wound itself. I guess walking around and such made it worse...” He fell into silence, the small rant seemed to only worsen his fear of them spreading more.

Logan nodded. “Alright... I think it may be a good idea for you to refrain from wearing the prosthetic for a while to see if that makes a difference. I’ll observe these to see what I can find out, and if there’s anything I can do anything to ease the pain or reverse this.” He picked up the wrap with the crystals.

“Alright,” Roman said in a quiet voice, uncertain of what to do or how to handle the situation at hand as Logan thanked him and took his leave, leaving the prince to carefully lift himself up.

Virgil poked his head in. “Roman, ready to go?” He glanced down with a slight frown. “...Is something wrong with the prosthetic?”

Roman froze in place, almost falling as he turned to look at Virgil. He looked down quickly and was relieved to realize his trousers were covering his leg. “I--uh n-no but ah--Logan thought we should let it rest for a few days.” He tried to sound confident, cursing himself as he started to stutter.

“Okay... watch out, Patton might bug you for piggybacks if you’re flying,” he said with a small smile, holding out his hand. “Still want to go for that walk?” Virgil asked.

Roman nodded, gently lifting himself into the air again and taking the other’s hand gently, a smile forming on his lips as he ‘walked’ out of the room with Virgil. “You know, these things have shown to be useful even if they were planned to be temporary,” the prince said, gesturing to the wings after a slightly awkward silence had fallen over them walking down the hallway.

“I like them. They’re pretty.” Virgil moved closer to him as they headed down towards the others. “And it makes me feel safe when you wrap me in them.”

Patton smiled at them when they all met up in front of the gates. “Ready for our little adventure, kiddos?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry guys, I'm sure that Roman will get better easily and everything will be okay...  
> :)  
> Seriously though, I hope you're all still enjoying this because I've been having a bit of trouble writing. I have a couple chapters of a buffer, but I need to keep up to keep from getting too anxious  
> Go to sleep at reasonable times, eat something healthy and make good choices  
> -Ro


	28. It Was A Peaceful Walk

“Ready for our little adventure, kiddos?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Roman sang, winking at Virgil as they headed off into the imagination, a place they could design at will. Now it showed fields full of flowers and woods with rivers weaving through them, caves waiting to be explored carved into the sides of hills visible on the horizon. “Shall we?” he said, flying to hover a bit above their heads.

Virgil nodded and they started walking. It was less than a minute before Patton gasped. “Oh, oh! Can you carry me, Roman? Please? I’d really like to see what it’s like to fly!” Virgil chuckled and gave the prince a look, a look that said “what did I tell you?”

Roman just smiled at his boyfriend before rushing down, pick up Patton bridal style and launching himself up into the air again. Patton let out a screech as wind blew through his hair, only quieting down when he saw how high they were now, the others below seeming more like ants than humans as Roman slowly circled above them. Patton clung to him for dear life.

Virgil looked up at them circling with a smile as he and Logan walked. He heard a faint screech from Patton.

Patton gripped Roman’s shoulders and shirt tightly. “Okay okay I think I’m ready to go down again,” he said loudly over the rushing air, shivering slightly and looking down again.

Roman smirked slightly. He was slightly tempted to free fall, but knew that the other would probably faint or burst into tears if he did, so the prince slowly circled down to the ground. They landed on the soft grass again, a few feet ahead of the others as he set Patton down. Roman grinned slightly as Patton wobbled on his legs, but the smile was wiped off his face quickly as he himself fell down as soon as his foot touched the ground, a sharp sting going through his body, then disappeared as soon as it started.

Patton went over to Logan, smiling but a bit shaky. “That was really fun... but I think I’m going to stay on the ground for now.” Virgil grinned to himself and smiled at Roman. “Thanks though, kiddo, that was really a lot of fun! Everything looks so cool from up there!”

“It does, doesn't it?” Roman said, looking down at his leg and touching the spot that hand stung to feel another crystal poking slightly through the fabric. “...Fuck,” he muttered quietly, though lifting himself into the air again and smiling at Virgil, trying to wipe the thoughts of worry from his mind.

Virgil glanced to where Roman had touched and the smile melted from his face. “Is that... they’re that bad now? Is that why you’re not wearing the prosthetic? Are you hurting?” He looked between Roman and Logan, desperate for answers.

“I--ah...” Roman looked at the logical trait, not wanting to hurt the other but already feeling Deceit trying to lure him in by lying. “It’s... not that bad. We can... we can just enjoy ourselves for now, alright?” he said, giving Logan a look that practically screamed for help as soon as the other looked away.

Virgil slowly nodded, putting on a smile. “Okay.” As soon as Roman took off again, he turned and gripped Logan’s arms. “How bad is he? What’s wrong? How do we help him?” he asked desperately. If anyone would have any answers for Virgil, it would be Logan.

“I--I don’t know. I have taken one of the crystals to analyze, but you have to give me time. I-it... it is bad. It has spread all over his bad leg, but this morning it wasn’t on the other. Meaning that it’s spreading even without the pressure being on it...” Logan looked at Virgil, who was looking helplessly at where Roman was laying flowers on Patton’s head with a soft smile. There was however clear pain cutting through the prince’s expression.

Patton was giggling softly and looking up at Roman. Virgil bit his lip. “You need to hurry with figuring something out if they’re still spreading no matter what,” he said quietly. “It hurts him, and we don’t even know how bad it is yet... please, hurry with it.”

“I’ll do my best,” Logan said quietly, watching as the prince dashed up into the air, hands gripping his leg for a moment. He soared down and landed in front of Virgil, pecking his lips before flying off again.

Virgil wrapped his arms around himself and waved at Roman to come back down. “...I’m really cold, I think I’m going to go back now,” he said, glancing at Logan. Patton nodded. “Okay kiddo!”

“You could stay here of course, but I think it’s best for Roman to go with Virgil. Patton and I can walk further if he wants to,” Logan said, looking over at both Roman and Patton. 

Patton nodded and took Logan’s hand, smiling at him. “See you two later!”

The creative trait wrapped Virgil up in his wings to keep him warm before flying up slightly and summoning a purple cape. “Here dearest,” Roman said, laying it on Virgil’s shoulders. “Let’s go home.” Virgil nodded and reached for Roman as they headed back out of the imagination, wanting his touch to help comfort him. Roman hovered lower, now only centimeters above the ground so he could grab the other’s hand, smiling softly at him as they walked the short distance back to the big gates of the imagination. “I shall get you a blanket and cuddles as--... as soon as we get to the common room again, my dark prince,” the prince said, pausing for a moment in the middle of the sentence as another spike of pain shot through his leg.

Virgil nodded slightly, his smile faltering when he sensed the pain Roman was feeling. “...Ro, is there anything at all that has helped it to hurt less?” he asked softly as they continued down the hall. “It hurts me to see you in pain...”

Roman’s smile lessened a bit, shoulder slumping slightly as he squeezed the other’s hand. “Not really dearest, but Logan shall find a way, I’m sure. For now... we shall just act like normal until he does, alright?” he said, eyes darkening a bit when his leg bumped lightly against things or his foot touched the ground.

Virgil nodded slightly and held his hand tightly. “Okay... I wish I could just take your hurt away,” he mumbled to himself. They made it to the rooms and Virgil looked up at Roman. “Where do you want to go to cuddle?” he asked sweetly, moving a little closer to being the prince but being careful not to brush against the crystals.

“Wherever there is a soft surface and your beautiful face I can look at, dearest,” Roman said, soft smile plastered on his face as he pulled the other closer, lifting them both a few inches above the ground and moving along the hallway. “Your room, my room, living room; you decide my angel,” he said, not paying attention to the small sting on a spot of his leg where the crystals could not have possibly spread... right?

“You’re a sap, you know.” Virgil smiled and wrapped his arms around Roman. “How about your room?” he suggested, kissing Roman’s jaw lightly.

Roman smiled, turning his head to kiss the other on the lips shortly. “Mhm, my room it is then,” he said, swiping the other off of his feet to fly through the hallway quickly, placing Virgil gently on his feet in front of his door and holding it open for him. “Shall we go then, my king?”

Virgil nodded happily and went in, flopping himself down on the soft bed with a smile. “Mm... come cuddle me,” he said, holding his arms out. “There is a distinct lack of Roman in my arms.”

Roman snorted before lifting himself into the air again. He hovered above the bed before letting himself fall down right next to the other, earning a screech of surprise before quickly wrapping his arms around Virgil, who curled practically into him. “Better, love?” he asked, the pain that temporarily shot through his leg and the wound slowly ebbed away. Roman giggled quietly, playing with Virgil’s hair as he tried to move even closer.

“Much better,” he agreed, pressing himself closer to Roman but avoiding touching the wound and crystals. “...I would be completely happy to stay like this forever, you know,” he said softly, starting to hum a quiet tune as he relaxed into the touch to his hair.

“As would I dearest, and we can stay here as long as you would like to,” Roman said, feeling his body completely relax as he played with the soft strands of hair. Virgil’s voice vibrated through his chest as he hummed the strangely familiar tune.

Virgil sighed at the touch to his hair and pressed soft kisses to wherever he could reach without moving too much. “Mmm... Roman?” he mumbled. “Why do you love me?”

Roman was taken aback for a moment, mostly because he wasn’t sure what to start with. “You--... You have the kindest and most gentle soul. Though at first glance you seem hard and cold, I always feel like I’m cared for since I got to know you better. It... feels like coming home every time we talk or cuddle or just are together. The small differences we have make you seem so incredibly perfect in a way I could only imagine to be and you--”

Virgil cut him off by pulling Roman in and kissed him deeply, a few tears forming in his eyes as he cupped the prince’s face. When he pulled away, Virgil sniffed quietly. “Roman Sanders, no. you are absolutely perfect in every way. From the light in your eyes to the sound of your voice when you sing to, yes, your body.”

Roman mumbled a few words of disagreement, but looked at the other with a small smile, wiping away the tear that had spilled down his cheek gently. “How can one be perfect when sitting across from perfection itself?” he said softly, not meaning to talk bad about himself but feeling a strange sort of self doubt nagging at him, making him unable to accept any compliment from the other.

Virgil gripped his hands tightly and let out a soft, shivering sigh. “Dearest prince, do I have to go, body part by body part, then through every little thing you do, and explain why they are perfect? Because I will.”

“Don’t worry dearest. I already have less than you do so I shall not lose this compliment battle,” he said jokingly, though the smile was wiped off his face as the remainder of his leg pressed against Virgil’s leg.

Virgil mistook the pain for him being upset and hugged him close. “I love you so much, you know that? I love you for exactly who you are.”

“I-I know dearest,” he whispered, the pain ebbing away slowly as he relaxed his tensed up body again. He wrapped his arms around the other as well as he tried both to relax and prepare himself for the next figurative bullet piercing his leg. “And know that I love you for who you are, who you were and who you will become as well, my dark knight.”

Virgil kissed him softly and brushed the hair from his eyes “I’m going to go grab a drink, do you want anything?” he asked softly.

“I can come if you want, dearest, but if not then a glass of water would be marvelous,” he said, not wanting to pressure the other into acting like his servant but not sure if he would stay conscious if he tried to stand.

“Of course my love, a water.” He smiled softly and went to the kitchen, making himself hot chocolate and getting Roman water... all while stubbornly ignoring Deceit who was sitting on the couch.

“Hey  _ Verge _ , how are you doing?” the lying trait asked, a smirk on his face as he fidgeted with his hat in his bandaged-up hands. “Well I myself am absolutely marvellous as you can see.” No reaction. He huffed as the other started to walk back out again. “Tell your boyfriend goodbye from me!” Deceit called after him.

Virgil handed Roman his water and sat down with his feet tucked underneath him, sipping his hot chocolate. He didn’t respond when Roman thanked him, just stared into his cup.

“Lost in your thoughts, darling?” Roman asked, a bit worried when the other still did not respond. Though he was worried, the prince could not deny that the sight in front of him was quite beautiful; the other’s head bowed down slightly, hands hugging the cup as steam swirled upwards in small curls. His face seemed peaceful except for the small frown breaking the peaceful sight.

Virgil glanced up and frowned slightly more. “Kind of...” He sighed and set the cup down. “I’m just a bit worried about you, the whole um... thing going on with your leg... And it didn’t help that Deceit was in the living room and was pestering me.” He sighed softly and shifted closer to Roman. “...Honestly though, nothing wrong with me that you need to worry about.”

Now it was Roman’s turn to frown, wrapping his arms securely around the other. “He won’t do us any harm dear. He is not in the state, nor the position to do so. And me... do not worry about my legs, I’m sure Logan will find something to make it return to normal soon enough...” A short silence fell, both of them realizing that the promise was a dangerous thing to make.

“Yes, I’m sure Logan knows exactly what’s wrong with you and how to fix it,” a drawling voice said from just outside the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who could that be?...  
> I'll tell you what he has to say on Monday  
> Eat something, go to bed at a reasonable hour (I say at midnight) and comment telling me what you think, pointing out typos, roasting me I don't care I just love talking to y'all  
> -Ro


	29. Back On The Table

Virgil tensed and moved closer to Roman. “Go away Deceit,” he mumbled, clinging to Roman’s hands.

“I would gladly,” the other said while stepping in, a dangerous glint in his eyes as he moved forward, still a bit careful with the arm wrapped in bandages and hidden underneath his cloak. “Now, I haven’t heard our little hero has... gotten a bit jumbled up with the dragonwitch?” he said, now almost dangerously close as Roman pulled Virgil to his chest as to protect him.

Virgil didn’t look away from Deceit, not trusting him. “It’s none of your business what happened to Roman, and I said get out, you--”

“I don’t know how to fix it.”

Roman’s head snapped upwards, looking at the other with wide eyes, face twitching slightly between pain and shock. “Why--I mean. If you--so you can help me? Or... prevent that--that stuff from spreading?”

“Probably not.” Deceit leaned against the doorframe looking proud of himself.

“...And you’re doing this out of the goodness of your heart?” Virgil clung to Roman. “What do you expect from us?”

“Hmm, not that much,” the lying trait said, his eyes glittering in the partly-lit room. “But I’m sure that little prince’s health is less important than the price.” Roman let a low growl escape from his lips, clutching onto Virgil’s hoodie and trying to come up with every possible bad thing that Deceit could want.

“Tell me what you want.” Virgil stared at him, pulling just the slightest bit away from Roman. “Then we’ll decide.”

Deceit shook his head. “I do not want us to switch one day. One day you don’t lend me full control over your life.” The smirk grew wider as he could see the other two trying to calculate how exactly this could go wrong in as many ways as possible.

“I’m sorry... some things I need you to clarify. You want to pretend to be me? Will the others get to be informed that it’s not me?”

“Yes. i will not pretend to be either Roman or you for one day, and everyone will know including yourself,” he said, smirk still twisting his features.

Virgil looked at Deceit, then down at Roman’s leg. He chewed his lip as he looked everywhere but Roman’s eyes. Finally he said, “...Okay. it’ll be me though, not Roman. Just tell me what’s wrong with him.”

Deceit shook his head and stepped closer, Roman automatically trying to move away and letting out a hiss as the crystals scraped against the mattress. “The dragonwitch did not claw your leg, I suppose? As she did, no part of her claw got stuck. That’s not what’s infecting your leg from the inside out. If it hasn’t spread to the other leg then you have to be slow.”

After a short moment reversing the lies, Virgil gasped softly and turned to Roman. “...Have they? Are they on both legs now, Ro?” He very carefully lifted up Roman’s pant leg and went pale. He turned to Deceit. “How do we stop it, fix it?”

Roman looked down. The crystals were scattered across his leg like stars, creating a twisted galaxy on his leg while the other one, the injured--infected--one, was now almost completely covered.

“Well, we might not need a surgery. Or we couldn’t find the dragonwitch so she can make it disappear.” Deceit smirked darkly as he took in their reactions. Surgery could be dangerous and none of them knew if the dragonwitch was even still alive or not.

“...It would be surgery to take the claw out of his leg?” Virgil confirmed, trying to be as rational as possible. “And would that make the crystals fall out or would they all need to be removed? What would the dragonwitch be able to do to make it disappear?”

“Surgery to remove the claw is not needed. The crystals won’t have to be pulled out or else they won’t spread further. If the dragonwitch is alive, she won’t be able to ‘lift the curse’ so to speak, and make them no longer spread or hurt."

Roman glanced at Virgil who he still had pressed slightly against his body. He knew very well that neither option was ideal. Both would require the crystals either to be removed or to stay like they were, and both were uncertain.

Virgil squeezed Roman’s hand gently. “I know you said we have to be fast, but we need some time to discuss this, Deceit. Alone?” Deceit shook his head no and stepped just outside, closing the door. Virgil looked at Roman. “...It’s your body, what do you think?”

Roman looked at him, uncertainty swimming in his eyes as he tried to rationalize what had been said. “I... think we should ask Logan for the surgery. B-but... if the dragonwitch is alive... yaknow.” He made a vague gesture, not even knowing what he really meant as he wrapped his arms around the other, feeling like the comforting touch would somehow help him think or just calm down his quick heartbeat.

Virgil clung to him. “...I don’t think she is, a-and... and I’d rather not try to find her,” he said quietly. “But I trust Logan, and I think if anything is going to happen, he’ll be the one able to do it.” Virgil tried to keep himself from shaking at the thought of the last time.

“Yeah... we-we’ll ask him, alright. A-and... everything will be fine, I’m sure.” Of course he wasn’t, but what other choice did they have? They had given Deceit their word so there was no going back. He looked at the other, trying to read his expression before giving him a gentle push, gesturing to him to get up. He lifted himself up slowly, letting out a growl as he leaned on his leg before rising up above the ground.

Virgil reached up slightly to hold his hand and they headed towards the imagination, meeting up with Patton and Logan just as they were leaving. Virgil explained, as quickly as possible and leaving out the deal with Deceit, what had just happened and their new knowledge. He didn’t let go of Roman’s hand.

Roman ‘stood’ beside him, moving up and down slightly with every flutter of his wings and squeezing the other’s hand every so often as to reassure him. “So Logan, do you think you can do it?” he asked, voice sounding strange, as if he hadn’t spoken in years, as he broke the thick silence that arose when Virgil had finished speaking.

Logan stepped a bit closer, his face grave but determined. “I will do everything in my power to remove it and help you return to normal,” he said seriously. “When do you want to begin?”

Roman was taken aback for a moment, Logan switching to his ‘robot’ state catching him off guard. “I--ah...” He looked at Virgil who seemed to be shaking slightly, their hands locked together tightly, and made a decision. “As soon as possible. If you’re ready then I am.” He squeezed the other’s hand once more, trying to contain his mind from coming up with all of the worst case scenarios.

Logan nodded. “Well I’m going to scrub up. If you could come to my room in about ten minutes,” he said, trying to push his emotions down like before to make it easier to do this objectively. With a quick nod, he left.

Virgil clung to Roman. “...he’ll fix it,” he whispered, almost as much to himself.

Roman just nodded, then turned to Patton. The moral side had stood still as a statue as they had explained the situation and conversed. “Pat?” As they did not get a response Roman flew closer, laying a hand on his shoulder to try and make him snap out of it.

Patton finally looked up at him. “Your... your leg? It’s so bad that you need surgery? Why didn’t you say anything?” He hugged Roman quickly. “...When I ask how you’re doing I really want to know.”

“I know Pat. i just--... we didn’t want you to worry and all...” Roman said, trying to hug the other back as best as possible without putting pressure on his leg. “We’ll... well, I’ll be fine alright? You two just have a movie night or something and by the time you wake up I’ll be back.” He knew he wouldn’t be able to stand for his word but he’d do everything to prevent the two of them from worrying or panicking.

Virgil leaned in after Patton stepped away and kissed Roman deeply. “I love you,” he whispered before taking Patton’s hand. The two of them went to the living room together.

Soon Virgil sat cuddled on the couch with Patton. He held the cup of hot chocolate he’d been given without drinking it, using the warmth to try and calm himself. Patton turned up the TV slightly so if Roman got loud it hopefully wouldn’t be heard.

As the door closed behind them Roman let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. Shoulders now slumped, he slowly made his way towards Logan’s room. It had been eight minutes since the logical trait had left. The air felt strangely suffocating, as if it was drying to drown him out as he knocked on the cold wooden door.

Logan opened the door and nodded slightly. “Alright... come in,, Roman,” he said evenly, moving out of the way. He closed the door behind him and washed his hands again. “Lie down there.” He gestured as he checked over everything.

Roman flew over to where he was directed and watched the other move around carefully. “You sure you’re able to do this Lo?” he asked, watching the other’s almost robotic movements that seemed so out of place, yet so painfully familiar. As he turned around again, his emotionless face showed no change of heart and Roman laid down slowly, suddenly more scared for his friend than himself.

“Honestly? No,” he said flatly, carefully revealing the affected part of Roman’s leg. “But I am responsible at least partly, if I left it in the last time I helped you, and I will do all that I can to remedy your state of being.”

“You did everything you cou--hnn!” He growled as the other carefully touched a crystal, Logan pulling his hand back quickly as if he had been burned.

“Alright. As we are technically imaginary, things like painkillers or numbing substances do not have effect on us, meaning you will have to feel everything,” the logical trait stated, a small scalpel in hand as he carefully laid his hand on a part of Roman’s leg that had not yet been touched by crystals.

Roman laid his head down on the hard surface of the table Logan had summoned for him, closing his eyes and waiting for the metal that was softly pressed against his skin to make a cut. The logical trait was still observing his leg closely until he determined where the claw was positioned, a sea of crystals covering the place making it nearly impossible to get through... A sharp sting made clear that Logan had started, one crystal pulled out.

Logan quickly made a cut in his leg to prevent a new crystal forming in the space. He worked methodically, removing crystals and continuing the incision until it was large enough. He deepened it slightly, eyes focused as he looked for the remnant of the claw.

Roman bit his lip harshly, knowing very well it would start bleeding if he didn’t stop, but not wanting to let the screams escape. The pain was inhuman, every touch feeling like a dagger going through him and every cut feeling like he was being sliced in half. One whimper was all it took to send him over the edge. A scream cut through the oddly silent room as Logan grabbed another crystal that appeared to have grown in his leg, as they kept spreading.

Logan’s grip on the scalpel tightened slightly when he started screaming, but he took a slow breath and relaxed it. He carefully continued until he found the remnant of the claw, reaching for some tweezers and relaxing very slightly.

***

Virgil clung to Patton’s arm tightly as the screams started echoing down the hall. He couldn’t help but think about all the things that could go wrong. Logan couldn’t find it. Deceit had been wrong. There was more than one piece and he’d miss some.

***

Roman screamed his heart out as Logan hot a hold of the claw, pulling it slightly to see how badly it had pierced into the leg. He twitched slightly as Roman squirmed, being held down again by bands around his arms and legs that the logical trait had quickly summoned. Though Roman was long gone, every time the claw was touched his whole body shook, nothing else seeming to exist other than him and the pain that drowned out every part of his senses.

Logan very, very slowly pulled, and it started to slide out. He carefully pulled it out, following the curve of the claw to make it come out as easily as possible.

***

Virgil was shaking, holding onto Patton tighter and tighter as Roman got louder.

Patton turned up the volume of the TV, it still not being loud enough to drown out the horrific screams. He held the other close, trying to contain his tears from spilling down his cheeks.

***

His whole body was being pulled inside out, there was no other way of describing the feeling as the claw slowly but surely eased its way out of the place it had been pierced into. He only realized it had been completely pulled out by a faint feeling of a hand on his shoulder.

“Roman,” Logan said quietly. “It’s out. I’m going to stitch the wound now, but I have an important question. Do you think you can handle me removing the crystals now or do you want some time to recover first?”

With every last ounce of strength, Roman pulled his mind out of the deep fog that was still trying hard to drown him out. “J-just do it now... I--... I don’t think I’ll b-be willing to do that again--again...” He let his head roll back, gritting his teeth at the shocks that still echoed through him even though the claw had been removed. He was unable to think clearly as he awaited the next wave of pain to hit, tears streaking his face, bottom lip chewed open and bleeding, hoping the others couldn’t hear him.

Logan nodded slightly and continued, his hands shaking slightly and sweat slowly dripping down his forehead as the area covered in crystals slowly became red, raw skin instead as he worked.

***

Virgil felt like he was about to die of a broken heart, hearing the screams. It was actually worse than when his leg had been amputated.

***

That he felt ill would be an extreme understatement. Every fiber of his being felt like it was being pulled apart as Logan worked his way through the thick layer of crystals that covered his left leg. The newer crystals that had taken over half his other leg remained untouched for now as his screams turned into whimpers, his body drained of energy so much that even breathing felt like a struggle.

Logan pulled out the last crystal from his left leg and let out a long breath. “We are going to take a break now. You need a moment, and some water, and if you feel up to it a small amount of food.” He looked at Roman and buried his emotions even deeper at the sight of his face. “Are you feeling able to eat anything?”

Roman’s eyes stayed closed, everything feeling somehow fake around him as the pain lessened but didn’t leave. “I--... No I don’t--don’t think...” His voice was so quiet it could almost be mistaken for the wind if there had been a window open in the room. He felt himself slip further into the darkness that seemed so inviting, letting his head loll to the side as he waved his hand slightly, trying to wordlessly make clear that his mouth felt like the Sahara at the moment before he slipped away completely.

Logan quickly went to get some water and sat next to Roman, very gently trying to bring him back to consciousness. “Roman, you need to at least drink something. I promise that after you can rest, but your body needs the fluids.”

The glass felt odd against his lips as he gulped down the liquid, forgetting to breathe until it was completely empty and laying down again. “C-can we--...” He stopped, knowing very well it was an idiot move but not wanting this to spread over more than one painful moment. “Just continue. I-I want it gone... please...”

Logan pursed his lips but didn’t argue. “As long as you will tell me if you truly cannot take more. I don’t want to put you through any more than you can handle. Promise that and I will continue.”

“Mmm fine,” he mumbled, closing his eyes again as he awaited the pain that would quickly follow. It was... odd. It almost felt like he was hoping for it, the sharp pain clearing his head from the worry or dark thoughts that had plagued it, a new, white canvas opening up in his head as if his whole slate of thoughts had been--the pain caught him off guard when it started again, these crystals laid deeper buried in his skin, making it more painful.

Logan worked efficiently, but not too quickly, so if Roman became completely overwhelmed he still had a chance to tell Logan. The pile of crystals grew steadily as each one was removed from his leg, creating a bloody gap on his shin and another on his thigh.

***

They had just relaxed a bit after Roman had stopped screaming, Patton almost convincing Virgil that it went well before another, ear piercing scream came floating through the walls, making them both flinch and Virgil cling to the moral side.

Virgil had tears streaming down his face silently, hoping that Patton wouldn’t notice, but they slowly soaked through his shirt. He curled up as small as he could and the tiniest sob escaped.

Patton wrapped the other in his arms, wishing once more that he could take away the hurt as Virgil silently sobbed, only a few despaired noises escaping from his lips as he did.

***

Once Logan had finished pulling out the very last of the crystals Roman was gone, head slumped sideways against the table and eyes rolled upwards. Tear streaks still very obvious on his cheeks. The only thing keeping the logical trait from panicking was that his chest still heaved and sunk in a slow rhythm. Logan carefully set a pillow under his head and placed anything that Roman might want or require on the table next to him: a water with a straw, a brothy soup, grapes cut in half, a bottle of Powerade, his cell phone. When he was sure he had everything Roman might need, Logan very carefully put a blanket over his patient and went to dispose of the crystals. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... that was fun  
> But now Roman will be okay, yeah? So that's good  
> Eat something, go to bed at a reasonable time, roast me for any typos  
> -Ro


	30. It Might Be Over Now?

Both Virgil and Patton were shaking now, the both of them seeking comfort by each other as silent tears made their way down, the moral trait babbling on about how it would be fine, how he, how they were going to be fine. Virgil was shaking, trying to keep his breathing in control as the suffocating silence wrapped around his throat, the thoughts of either the best or worst case scenario mixing up and making it hard to think properly as Patton rubbed his back. They both looked up immediately when Logan came into the room. 

He sat down next to them, silent for a moment before speaking hoarsely. “The claw has been removed, the incision from taking it out is stitched, and all of the crystals have been removed as well. Roman is going to be on bedrest when he wakes up, because the places that were covered by crystals are also now sore and open.”

Virgil nodded, croaking out a soft thank you as a weight both got lifted and pressed down on his shoulders. He was alive. Unconscious, but alive. The darker trait felt himself slump into Patton’s arms.

The logical trait looked at his hands, a few smudges of red on his violently shaking fingers as he looked at them like they weren’t really there. He clenched his hands into tight fists, then opened them again. The smears were still there, along with some red curves from his fingernails pressing into the flesh of his palms.

The fatherly trait held Virgil close. “...Go wash your hands, Lo,” he said gently, running a hand through Virgil’s hair to try and calm him. It worked a bit; the anxious side was still shaking, but significantly less.

Logan nodded and walked off. Virgil climbed out of Patton’s lap immediately, looking towards the logical trait’s room with a grim and determined expression. The father figure grabbed at his arm to stop him. “Kiddo, you don’t want to see him just after, and Logan said that he isn’t awake at the moment anyway. Just give him a little time, okay? He’s alright, and he will be alright.”

Logan walked away from them and towards the door leading to the bathroom as fast as wasn’t suspicious. Once the door closed shut behind him he let his already cracked mask fall, shaking as he grabbed onto his shirt, breathing quickly getting faster as every image of what he had just done, every smell, every ear piercing scream, hit him with the force of a ram. The water turned red as it hit his hands and the screams that had died down still echoed in his thoughts. Everything seemed like too much. Too much, too much too--

He jumped slightly as the first crystal that he had pulled out, the one he had been planning to examine, fell out of his pocket. It clattered to the ground with the sound of glass shattering, though it remained in one piece. He picked it up, trying to keep his hands steady as he looked at the crystal, at how the sharp end pressed slightly into his skin. A sharp sting made him drop the black object, a small drop of blood welling on the tip of his finger.

Patton carefully laid a sleeping Virgil on the couch, where he curled into himself and mumbled. The fatherly trait covered him with a blanket and went to check on Logan, knocking softly. “Lo? It’s me, are you okay?”

Logan turned around quickly, wiping his face clean of any leftover tear streaks and bowing down to pick up the crystal, though hissing as it seemed to burn his skin and leaving it on the ground before opening the door. Logan shook his head slightly as if trying to shake the lingering voices out of his head.

Patton looked at him and pulled him into a gentle hug. “Hey, Lo, you’re amazing. You know that?” he said softly. One hand gently rubbed Logan’s back. “You did so well, but it’s over now. You can let it out.”

Logan nodded but stood still, trying to find that invisible switch in his mind as he always did before when trying to let out his feelings. And slowly, very slowly he relaxed into the embrace, practically collapsing into Patton’s arms as tears made their way down his cheeks, shoulders shaking and he clung to the other side, repeating his words like a mantra. ‘It’s over now.’

Patton stood there and let him cry, not shushing him or telling him it was okay, just holding Logan and letting him let out everything he needed to. “I know, dear, I know,” he mumbled soothingly in Logan’s ear. “I’ve got you.”

Logan nodded, smiling while the tears still made their way down, resting his head on the other’s shoulder and letting Patton’s comforting scent and warmth calm him down. “I know dear...”

“Want to go to my room and I can make you hot chocolate?” he offered. He kissed Logan’s cheek softly and pulled away slightly, still holding him.

“Th-that’d be marvelous dear.” He only realized his voice had a slight echo in it as it stopped doing so. He held the other’s hand but let go of his death grip on Patton’s shoulder as they made their way out of the bathroom. The hallway was quiet, though for a change it didn’t seem threatening. It felt peaceful.

Patton sat him down with a kiss to his forehead. “I’ll be right back,” he promised. After a short detour--he decided to leave a mug of hot chocolate on the coffee table for Virgil to have when he woke up as well--Patton returned to the bedroom with two mugs of hot chocolate. “Did you want marshmallows or no?”

“Whatever you have made for me is perfect dear, thank you.” The last two words were added with a small smile following, his mind finally seeming to calm down fully as the other took place on the bed beside him.

Patton smiled and held out the cup without marshmallows. “I brought one of each because I didn’t know what you’d like, but if you don’t care then I’m going to have the marshmallows!”

“Of course you are,” Logan said and now couldn’t help but smile as he wrapped an arm around the other, careful not to spill the hot chocolate as he pulled Patton closer. He just enjoyed the pure comfort that seemed to surround him.

***

Roman woke up feeling oddly calm. Tired eyes darted around the room before they landed on his leg, bandaged up and numb but without the never ending pain it had provided over the last few weeks. He propped himself up on his elbow, grunting at his sore back but still happily surprised at the general lack of pain that seemed to be present. As he called out for Virgil his voice was raspy, not more than just a whisper. He just hoped the other was near.

Virgil woke up and immediately reached out for Roman, his heart sinking when he realized he was alone on the couch. He saw the mug of hot chocolate and sat up, holding it in his hands and using the warmth of the cup to comfort himself instead of drinking it.

He called out again, happy as he realized his voice sounded louder now though still barely more than a normal speaking voice. He tried to get up, hissing as his sore muscles protested though continuing to try either way.

Virgil turned around, pretty sure he’d just heard his name. Slowly setting down the cup, he got up off the couch and headed towards the hall of bedrooms, not sure where it had come from.

He was sitting upright now, leaning against the headboard as he let his breathing slow down, the little action having tired him out. He called the darker trait’s name once more, hoping that the shuffle he had heard was indeed his lover and not just his mind wanting it to be.

Virgil slowly opened the door to Logan’s room, his face lighting up and tears forming in his eyes when he saw Roman. “Hey, love...” He restrained himself from jumping at the prince and wrapping him in a tight hug, worried about hurting him. He was definitely still feeling the effects of the surgery. Virgil instead sat next to him and took his hands. “Logan fixed you up?”

Roman nodded, cupping the other’s cheeks and swiping away the single tear that had escaped from his eyes. “I missed you,” he said, both feeling like crying out of happiness and cringing as he realized it had probably only been a few hours. He pushed that thought aside and opened his arms to invite the other in for a hug they both needed.

Virgil leaned into him immediately, wrapping his arms around Roman and taking a deep breath, inhaling his scent. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” he mumbled, cuddling into his arms with a soft smile.

The prince hummed, sighing happily before completely relaxing and wrapping his arms around the other, finally feeling at ease. A feeling he had all but lost after the fight with the dragonwitch seemed to be flooding his mind and making him unable to stop smiling... true happiness.

Virgil fell back asleep in the comfort of Roman’s arms. It was the most at ease he’d felt in the past two months... for the moment, everything was fine, and now Roman would truly be getting better. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. I promise the next chapter is going to be 90% tooth-rotting fluff to make up for being so horrible. The answer is no, this is not the end my friends  
> Eat something, drink water, go to bed at a reasonable time  
> -Ro


	31. Movie Night

Everything was going far better than it had in a long time. After a few weeks, Roman had slowly but surely recovered as Virgil waited on his needs, bringing him food and water and countless kisses. After a while and with the green light from Logan, he started wearing his prosthetic again soon for short periods of time, slowly extending to longer wears. He did have patchy scars on his legs, but Virgil insisted they were just as sexy as battle wounds, kissing them better whenever Roman felt too self-conscious about them.

The only problem was that the other shoe hadn’t dropped yet. Deceit had hardly appeared around the other sides since what Virgil had taken to thinking of as his dark pact. In fact, one could almost say that the lying trait had been kind to them the few times he had shown up, but Virgil knew that there was no way Deceit had forgotten about his deal.

Virgil tried to ignore it, to enjoy making cookies with Patton, doing crosswords and Sudoku with Logan, cuddling with Roman... but it was always in the back of his head. He was sure that was part of the fun of it for Deceit; keeping him on edge with the knowledge that it could happen at any time. It didn’t make it any better for him though. 

“Sweetheart?”

Virgil looked up at Roman. “Hm? Sorry. Just… thinking, what’s up?”

“Want to watch a movie?” he asked. “I can get some popcorn.” When Virgil quickly nodded, the prince grinned and tugged gently at the string of his hoodie--Roman’s hoodie, technically. “We could make a whole thing of it if you want. Huge pile of blankets and pillows and hot chocolate.”

“See, now  _ this  _ is why I love you,” Virgil said with a quiet giggle, hopping up to his feet. “I’ll go get the blankets and pillows... and you’ll grab the food?” He said it slightly hesitantly. Roman had been getting better about that as well, but Virgil knew those kind of things didn’t just disappear.

“Yeah, sounds like a plan,” Roman said, smiling back at him as Virgil skipped off to the rooms. He hummed to himself as he went to the kitchen, deciding to make the popcorn on the stove instead of in the microwave because he was feeling just a little fancy.

Virgil brought a giant pile of blankets and pillows down to the couch, setting up a cozy little nest half on the couch, half on the floor. “Should I get the others, or do you want it to be just the two of us tonight?”

“Whichever you’d like angel, but I’d love to spend some quality time with my love.” Roman came into the living room, carrying the bowl of popcorn. He smiled fondly at Virgil snuggled up. “Why don’t you pick a movie while I grab our hot chocolate?”

Virgil nodded and turned on Netflix, flipping through a few different options before deciding on the live action Cinderella. He took a quick nibble of the popcorn as he waited for his prince to come back.

Roman hummed happily to himself as he carefully walked back into the living room with the two mugs of hot chocolate, sitting down next to Virgil with a smile. “Cinderella? Got your eye on a different Prince Charming, Virgil Sanders?” he said teasingly as he handed him the pale purple mug with his signature storm cloud on it.

“Never.” Virgil snuggled closer to him and cupped the warm mug in his hands. He felt more relaxed than he had in a long time, the comfort of Roman holding him as well as the hot liquid warming his hands making him smile softly. He relaxed more as the movie started. Everything was very at ease with the two of them cuddled together in a comfortable mound of blankets, pillows, and cushions. The only sounds other than the movie were the quiet crunching of popcorn and an occasional soft slurp from a mug of hot chocolate.

Then it showed a close up of eyes--that appeared to have a flash of yellow in them. Virgil gasped softly and spilled hot chocolate on the floor. His head whipped around to look behind them--at the empty living room behind the two of them.

“Babe?” Roman said gently. “What’s wrong?”

Virgil turned back. “Can... can we rewind the movie a little bit? There was something that I saw that...” He stammered into silence.

“Sure, love.” He picked up the remote and scrolled back a couple times without asking any more questions. 

The shot showed again on the screen, and the eyes on the screen were clearly blue, not a trace of yellow, not even in the reflection. Virgil shook himself slightly and told himself it was nothing, but he couldn’t stop. God he was on edge. He couldn’t help but imagine that Deceit was sitting behind them, breathing down his neck, just waiting to see what information he could use against him and--

“Virgil?”

He looked up at his clearly concerned boyfriend. The truth sat on the tip of Virgil’s tongue, his fears about what was happening, but he swallowed and shook his head slowly. “Sorry Ro... guess I was spacing out. Thought I saw a reflection and well... got lost in thought.”

Roman could tell that wasn’t the whole truth, but he just wanted to make Virgil feel comfortable for the time being. “Alright, love.” He wrapped his arm around Virgil and pulled him a bit closer, humming along with the song in the movie. When Virgil smiled softly and rolled his eyes, Roman got up and started dramatically singing instead, making up his own lyrics to go with the music as Cinderella and her prince danced on the TV.

Virgil sighed, but the smile didn’t leave his face. “Good god, you’re crazy...”

“Crazy about  _ you _ !” Roman announced, grinning broadly. He pulled Virgil up to his feet, waltzing happily across the living room.

Virgil chuckled and rolled his eyes, then smiled more softly and leaned a little closer to him, glancing down to see that Roman was in fact moving on his feet and not simply using his wings. “Your leg must be doing a lot better if you can dance in your prosthetic now,” he said softly.

Roman’s hand drifted down from the traditional, slightly exaggerated waltz hold he had taken on Virgil’s shoulder blade down to the small of his back. “It is,” he replied quietly, their movements slowing and shifting until their dance did little more than rotate in a circle. “You seem to have succeeded in nursing me back to health.”

Virgil smiled softly and rested his head on his prince’s shoulder. He relaxed more as Roman slowly wrapped his wings around him, filtering out some of the light in the room. The slightly mottled shadows falling on them made it feel almost like they were in a forest. The scent of the prince--warmth, cinnamon, and something else indescribably Roman--enveloped him along with his wings. Virgil sighed happily as his eyes slowly closed.

Roman held him closer and kissed his forehead gently. “My amazing dark angel,” he said softly, brushing his hair from his eyes. “I can't believe I'm this lucky.” 

Virgil smiled, blushing lightly. “Ro... I'm the lucky one, really.” He cupped Roman's face and rested his forehead against the prince’s. “...So, so lucky.”

He smiled softly and let his wings encircle Virgil even closer. “I disagree, my dearest, but I don’t want to argue with you.” Roman and Virgil continued to dance together in a slow circle, even after the song in the movie ended.

Eventually Virgil pulled away slightly and tugged Roman gently back down into their nest of blankets and pillows, nuzzling his head against Roman’s shoulder and sighing happily as the prince kept his wing wrapped around him as they snuggled on the blanket-strewn floor, leaning against the couch and giving most of their attention to the fairy tale playing out on the screen in front of them. The other few tendrils of Virgil’s focus noticed the warm smells of chocolate, popcorn and the familiar, delicious cinnamony scent of his boyfriend; he felt Roman gently rubbing his thumb over Virgil’s knuckles as they held hands; he felt a slight tickle from the soft black feathers encircling him.

Roman looked down at his boyfriend snuggled close, looking adorable in the dark red hoodie that hung loosely on his form. “Mm, you should wear red more... and just my clothes in general,” he said in a slightly teasing voice, though he meant it sincerely. “You look nothing short of perfect.” He chuckled as Virgil blushed almost the same colour as the sweater he was wearing. “And how very cute too.”

“Romannn...” He hid his face with his hands, sleeves of the hoodie slipping over his fingers. “Shut up, I’m not cute...”

“Oh yes you are, you’re the cutest little puppy dog that I’ve ever seen!” the prince announced with a grin, cutting Virgil off from arguing with him again by holding his face and gently connecting their lips, still smiling into the kiss. He tried to pull away a few times to keep protesting that he wasn’t cute, that he was a dark emo thank you very much, but quickly relaxed in the kiss, a faint smile flickering at his lips as well.

“Mmm... well, maybe just a little bit cute in your oversized clothes,” Virgil mumbled to him as their lips parted for just a moment of breath, then kissed Roman again as a smirk spread across the prince’s lips, cutting him off before he could gloat. “Plus it makes it obvious that I’m yours and they always smell like you...”

Roman laughed softly into the kiss and pulled Virgil closer, deepening the kiss slightly. They got more lost in each other and the movie became little more than background noise as they tumbled back into the pile of blankets and pillows, all giggles and mostly soft kisses, with just a couple more firm touches or slightly rougher kisses. 

Roman eventually pulled away to look at a very blushy Virgil, surrounded by blankets and pillows and smiling shyly back up at the prince who was leaning over him. He beamed at his boyfriend, leaning a bit closer and just taking in the gorgeous sight.

“What are you doing?” Virgil asked softly.

Roman smiled more. “Making a memory.” He kissed him once more with a soft smile, then climbed off of him. “Come on.” Roman gently pulled Virgil into his lap to watch the remainder of the movie, humming softly.

Virgil relaxed against the prince, resting his head on Roman’s chest. He watched the movie for a while, but focused more on the soft sound coming right from his boyfriend’s chest and the low rumbles as he hummed rather than paying attention to the audio of the movie. By the time that the movie ended, he was looking up at Roman instead of even looking at the screen of the TV. 

The only way he realized that it had ended was when Roman shifted to pick up the remote and turn the TV off, then look down at him. “Well, my dear... what now?”

Virgil shrugged slightly, leaning against Roman. “I mean, it’s kind of late... we could just go to bed and cuddle now if you’d like.” He was feeling sleepy and clingy at the moment, and going to bed seemed like a valid excuse to just snuggle close to his boyfriend.

Roman smiled and nodded. “Sounds good to me, my dearest.” He picked Virgil up, making him squeal softly in surprise, and carried him to his own room. He hummed softly and chuckled as Virgil dragged the blankets behind them. “...Goodness, you’re adorable, you know that?”

Virgil hid his face. “Noooo...” he protested weakly, but without struggling against Roman as they cuddled together on the soft bed. He cuddled closer to the prince and closed his eyes, barely hearing Roman chuckle and whisper it to him again. He sighed happily and rested his head in the crook of his neck, a smile on his face as he slowly drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, another chapter! I decided I'd give the boys a bit of a break, some cute fluffy movie night for you guys as well as them :)  
> Y'all can roast me if you see a typo, and just comment anything you want! I really like talking to you guys and seeing people enjoying the writing <3  
> Love you all, make good choices  
> -Ro


	32. Deal Made Well

_ Virgil woke up tied to a chair. _

_ He gasped and struggled slightly, looking around desperately. “Help... help me!” he yelled desperately, squirming more. Virgil bit his lip as he saw that the room was empty other than a screen in front of him. It flickered on, from darkness to a starkly white bathroom. _

_ “Hello, Virgil sweetheart,” Deceit purred, waving at his reflection in a mirror. It was as if Virgil was seeing out of his eyes. “Today isn’t the day~” _

_ Virgil gasped and struggled harder. “No... no this is not the deal!”  _

_ He watched helplessly as the image on the screen shifted, and Deceit morphed to look like Virgil. “...Oh yes. This is not at all going to be fun.” _

***

Roman looked up as Virgil came down the stairs with wet hair. “Sorry I wasn’t there when you woke up,” he said. “I just went to take a shower.” He kissed Roman’s cheek as he went to get himself breakfast, but it seemed like an empty gesture.

He frowned slightly. “...Is everything okay, angel? You seem kind of... off.”

Virgil immediately perked up at that comment. “No, I’m fine my prince. Everything is okay.” He tugged his sleeves down slightly more over his hands.

Roman frowned more. He recognized the gesture from quite a while ago... from before any of this chaos had started. “Virgil? Have you...”

He looked up quickly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Roman,” he said a bit sharply. “I’m fine.” Virgil grabbed an apple. “I’m going for a walk.”

“Virgil, please--” Roman stood up, but Virgil was down the hall before Roman was even out of his seat. He frowned as he saw the darker side rushing down the hall towards the entrance to the imagination. “Virgil?”

***

_ “No no no no no...” Virgil struggled harder in the chair as Deceit chuckled under his breath. He was leading Roman there on purpose, he was taking Roman into the darker part of the imagination... the same place that he himself had been dragged when the dragonwitch took him. Virgil strained and the restraints dug sharply into his wrists. “Deceit what are you playing at? Don’t hurt him, don’t you dare! Don’t you fucking--!” _

***

“Virgil!” The prince’s voice echoed through the forest he had seen Virgil run into.

Roman flew through the shadowy trees, gently landing on his feet and running down the winding, slightly overgrown path that formed instead as the trees got closer together. He kept his eyes on the ground, keeping an eye out for Virgil’s footsteps and other signs that he was still going the right way. He summoned his sword just in case as he carefully hurried through the forest, growing more worried as the underbrush thickened around the path and less and less sunshine made it through the branches of the trees above.

“...Virgil?”

Suddenly there was a faint snapping sound ahead. The crack of a branch, a quiet sob. He quickly sped up again.

***

_ Virgil gasped as he realized where exactly Deceit was heading. Where he was leading Roman with his strategic sounds of distress.  _

_ “Fuck! No, no you don’t, don’t! Leave him alone, this was not the deal!” He yanked his arms desperately, making the chair rock back slightly, hovering on just the back two legs for a bit longer than could be comfortable before falling sharply back down, Virgil gasping in shock. That normally would have stopped his struggle, but this wasn’t about him. This was about what Deceit was doing to Roman. Virgil yanked again, feeling the harsh rub of rope burn against his wrists. _

***

Roman faltered when he first entered the clearing, which was somehow just as dark as the dense forest around it despite there not being any trees to block out the light. It was almost as if a storm had risen while he had been travelling through the deep woods. Virgil seemed to have vanished from sight, and the dim clearing was empty other than him. He turned in a slow circle.   
  


Then hair raised on the back of his neck as he heard a low, rumbling growl echo from behind him.

***

_ Virgil gasped as he saw an incredibly jumbled creature stalk out from between the trees... it would have looked ridiculous if it weren’t so absolutely terrifying. A copy of his own hand reached out and gestured to the clearing, giving a soft hiss as if a command, and the giant monster immediately bounded into the open area with a snarling growl. Virgil’s heart dropped when he heard a cry from Roman. _

_ “Run! Roman, just run!” _

***

Roman immediately regretted several decisions. He regretted not telling either of the others before he rushed off through the imagination. He regretted refraining from making a plan before going to help Virgil. He regretted pushing the love of his life until he ran off to escape.

He really, really regretted tossing a Manticore-Chimera into Thomas’s imagination.

The two-headed beast snarled at him, crouching in a predatory stance in front of Roman who drew his sword. The prince almost laughed darkly as he shifted on his prosthetic, hearing his own words from their most recent video echoing in his head. _ “So you’re facing this Manticore-Chimera, and let’s say you’re wounded. You’ve got a broken leg or something.” _ It had been a small inside joke with the others, but now it was anything but funny as he stepped back slightly from the angry monster. One crippled prince with a sword against a beast he had specially designed to provide a challenge at the best of times--

That was when he remembered that he still had the ability to get out. He desperately wanted to help Virgil, wanted to keep him safe... but if he needed to get away he could still fly away. Roman was fairly sure that he could outfly this behemoth.

...But that didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to try and fight it.

He took a slightly shivering breath and spread his wings slightly as the Manticore-Chimera slowly stalked forward, double tails swishing angrily.

***

_ There was a smattering of leaves obscuring his--their?--vision of the clearing in front of Deceit, as if he were hiding behind a bush to watch. Virgil was shaking as he tried both to hold himself together and get out. He couldn’t just sit here. He couldn’t just watch as Roman was attacked and toyed with and-- _

_ Virgil couldn’t even scream anymore. He just watched the screen, hardly even able to breathe as Deceit watched through the undergrowth, letting out a dangerous chuckle as the clearing exploded into movement. The giant beast let out a roar from the lion head as the goat side lowered to expose its horns, as if to gore Roman.  _

_ Virgil finally gasped in air and let out a choked sob, tears streaming down his face. They had been there before, probably... he was focusing too hard on Roman facing off against the monster to notice before. _

***

Both heads screamed in his ear. 

Roman let go of his sword, leaving it stuck almost all the way to the hilt in the monster’s right shoulder. He immediately flew back, hovering slightly in the air as it thrashed, trying to hit him with his claws. This was it, he had to run. Roman flew away as fast as he could, hearing the beast roar in pain and anger behind him.

There was a decision he had to make, and it broke his heart slightly as he reached the gates. If he locked the gate to the imagination then Virgil would be trapped there with the Manticore-Chimera, but if not there was a fair chance the angry monster would find one of his friends before he did. Roman held up his hand in front of the chains on the gate and willed them together, waiting for them to be completely fused before spreading his wings again and rushing off in desperate search for Logan.

He was out of breath when he reached the logical side, panting and red-faced. Roman gripped his shoulder, aware that it was probably a very concerning sight to see him covered in blood. “It’s not mine,” he gasped out as he tried to catch his breath. “Manticore... Chimera... Virgil’s trapped with it...” The prince gripped at the stitch forming in his chest. “Need... need help saving him...”

Logan frowned and helped Roman stand steady. “In the imagination?” he asked, tensing up a bit when the prince nodded and shivered slightly. “Alright, we’re going to get him out of there. We will get him without engaging the Manticore-Chimera if at all possible, in attempts to keep anyone from getting harmed more than they may be already. Can you summon more protective equipment for us?”

Roman closed his eyes and concentrated for a moment before two shields materialized in his hands, one of which he passed over to Logan. “Should I get one for Patton as well?” he asked.

Logan shook his head. “We shall tell him where we are going, but he will stay here to prepare. Virgil will almost definitely need comfort when he returns, and there is a possibility that we will get wounds that must be tended to. I will meet you back at the gate of the imagination in five minutes.”

Roman nodded at him. “Alright... you go and tell him. Meet you there soon.” He flew back towards the large, chained gates, hoping that he managed to leave before Logan noticed the tears threatening to spill from his eyes and that he would take long enough that the prince could try to pull himself together.

***

_ Roman had left. All Virgil could see was what came out of Deceit’s eyes, which were currently roving over the injured Manticore-Chimera. _

_ “Come on, come on, where’s Roman! What happened to Roman! Did he get hurt? Why did he leave? Roman!” _

_ Of course nobody answered him. Nobody could even hear him. Virgil continued to tug at the ropes binding him to the chair, despite knowing that it was near futile. He knew from experience that Deceit could tie some severely effective knots, but he continued to struggle desperately. If there was any way that he could get out and get to Roman, damn it he was going to. _

_ He gasped in pain as the slightly frayed rope rubbed into the raw marks on his wrists. _

***

Roman was shifting slightly from side to side in front of the imagination when Logan appeared at the end of the hall, holding the shield Roman had provided for him. He nodded grimly at the logical side before slowly unlocking the chain that held the gate closed. 

Logan followed Roman as he led him in the direction he said he had gone to find the beast the original time.

***

_ Virgil heard a low chuckle come from Deceit as there was the clear noise of people coming through the woods again. “Now it’s not show time,” he whispered with a slight hiss in his voice. He growled slightly and whistled lowly to the monster. _

***

“H-help!”

Roman sped up when he heard the nervous cry, crashing through the remainder of the trees and freezing at the horrifying sight in front of him. Virgil was pressed against a rock with the large claw of the Manticore-Chimera pinning him there. The anxious side locked his terrified, desperate eyes with the prince’s.

“Roman! Help!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand BOOM the angst is back  
> :)  
> -Ro


	33. Physical Fight, Emotional Pain

Roman snarled and dropped his shield without a second thought, another sword appearing in his hand as he charged at the beast, yelling in anger. The Manticore-Chimera whipped around, snake-tail snapping its jaws. The lion head bared its teeth, a few flames flickering from between the sharp teeth--

Shit.

Roman dove out of the way just before the fire roared at the spot he had just been occupying.

He could feel the heat of the flames flickering just behind him, barely missing him and slightly singeing his clothes. Chimeras can breathe fire, of course. He glanced back and saw that Logan had gotten out of the way and protected himself with his shield--of course. He was logical and prepared... unlike Roman.

_ Okay, what do we have to watch out for… Lion head, fire, goat horns, legs--both clawed front feet and strong hooves in the back--poisonous scorpion tail, and another tail that’s actually just a live snake, _ Roman thought grimly, getting to his feet again as he assessed the enemy in front of him. All things he needed to avoid.  _ This should be exciting. _

Roman’s plan ran through his head quickly and he whipped around to the logical side standing with him. “Logan, get to Virgil!” he instructed as he raced closer to the Manticore-Chimera and spun his sword in his hand. He growled lowly and thrusted his sword into the underarm of the beast, on the side he hadn’t hit before. There was a shockingly loud double scream, pain and anger. Roman pulled it out, causing another spatter of blood, and ducked underneath. He desperately avoided all the legs and dodged when the scorpion tail lashed at him, but forgot about the snake tail. At least it snapped at his prosthetic instead of getting any flesh, but it still knocked him to the ground. He squirmed away quickly, snatching his sword back up and attempting to regain his footing without giving the beast another chance to attack him.

Logan managed to get around Roman and the large monster through the chaos, making it over to take the hands of a shaky Virgil and help him to his feet. “Come on, we need to get you out of here...” he said, glancing away at a loud roar from the Manticore-Chimera as the prince fought to distract the beast for them. 

He didn’t notice the expression on the other side’s face changing from fear to... something else... he looked away from the anxious side, turning with a concerned look at the prince to see if there was anything he could do to help Roman--simply distract the creature, but what if he threw Roman off as well?--when he was suddenly thrown off balance.

***

_ Virgil gasped as Deceit lunged forward, grabbing the logical trait by his shirt and shoving him off balance. Logan was forced to the ground, pinned down by familiar hands. He yanked his own hands desperately; the ropes were stained slightly now with his blood and his face was streaked with tears. _

_ “No, no, fucking no! Get off him! Logan!” _

***

Roman ran a short distance away from the Manticore-Chimera and turned  to check on the others, looking up just in time to see as Virgil wrestled Logan down to the ground. He stepped back slightly as if he’d been pushed, a look of confusion and shock on his face.

“Virgil, wha--” Logan struggled underneath Virgil, who held him against the ground firmly. “What are you doing? Stop!”

Roman rushed over. “Virgil, no, we--” He gasped as the side looked up at him and his eyes glinted yellow. “No. No!” He tugged “Virgil” off of Logan and hesitated for a moment. Was this just Deceit disguised as Virgil, or was he possessing the anxious trait? He couldn’t leave him in danger if that was even a small possibility. He bit his lip. “Logan, go. I’d carry you but I can’t outfly it holding both of you. Just run for the exit, I’ll keep it distracted.” He took off holding “Virgil” tightly, who snarled and squirmed in his grip.

Roman followed Logan loosely, flying over the logical trait as he rushed towards the gates of the imagination but swerving to avoid getting too far ahead and to taunt the monster in different directions, trying to keep his friend safe as well as himself and--well...

He could hear the Manticore-Chimera behind him and suddenly swerved sharply to avoid when it blew fire at him again. “Come on come on come on,” he whispered.

***

_ “Come on come on!” Virgil strained forward in his chair as if that would somehow help Roman get out of danger quicker. He winced as the flames shot past him; he could almost feel the heat on his own skin--or perhaps that was just rope burn against his now rubbed raw wrists and a face hot from crying and struggling. _

_ “Come on, Roman... get out of there, quick...” _

***

Roman zoomed through the gates as soon as he saw that Logan had crossed through into the main part of the mind palace again, not letting his grip on the imposter Virgil loosen. He held out one hand and, with a loud, whooshing noise, the gates slammed shut. The chains came to life and wrapped around the bars, almost like snakes or vines. 

“...Now what do we do?” the prince like side asked, panting slightly and holding “Virgil’s” arms behind his back to keep him from running away or hitting either of them. “What if he’s not Deceit--I mean, he is, but what if it’s actually Virgil being... possessed or something?”

“Now we take him to Thomas,” said Logan immediately. “We know that he can force Deceit to reveal himself, so if that is the case we will know because he will not morph into Deceit.” He took a step back as “Virgil” yanked an arm free and angrily swung at him before Roman caught hold of it once more and held his arms against his sides. The prince nodded in agreement at the plan and they sank down together.

Thomas looked up from his computer as they appeared in the living room. “Logan, Roman, Virgil? What’s going--”

“Logan, Roman, Deceit,” the prince said grimly. “But we aren’t sure if he’s Deceit in Virgil’s clothing or Deceit in... Virgil’s skin. We need you to get him to reveal to us so we know.”

Thomas nodded slightly and took a breath. “Show me who you really are,” he said, all three of them watching as the side’s eyes changed and scales appeared on half of his face, raising up slightly from the rest of his skin.

Roman growled and grabbed him by the front of his cape. “You  _ fucking  _ snake... what did you do with Virgil? Where is he?”

“I’m going to tell you,” he hissed, getting closer to the prince and sneering. “It’s somewhere you’ll find him.”

“You are going to fucking  _ tell  _ me!”

***

_ Virgil shivered at the sight of Roman looming in, eyes flickering between hazel brown and blood red... the honey-warm colour he loved and the dark menace he had grown to fear. It was obvious that Roman had a hand tightly around the lying trait’s neck both from the position of his hand and the slight strain and rasp when Deceit spoke. _

_ “...Or you’ll what?” _

_ “Oh, you don’t want to know,” Roman snarled. “You don’t even want to imagine. Remember when Virgil woke up in hysterics,  _ Sir _?”  _

_ Virgil definitely did, and shuddered more at the memory. _

_ “That will seem like a god damn cake walk if you don’t tell me what you did with him. I will only ask one more time. Where. Is. Virgil.” _

_ He was shaking now, his entire body trembled. This wasn’t Roman, the princely, kind character he loved. The one who might boast of his conquests and battles but, at least in front of his friends, would never hurt a fly. All the kindness, all the emotions had disappeared from behind Roman’s eyes, replaced with grim efficiency. _

***

The prince thought that he had won when Deceit’s expression grew fearful, but then a voice that wasn’t his own passed the lying trait’s lips.

“Please, Roman… please don’t hurt me…” a familiar voice begged, fear and a trace of panic weaving through the shaky words.

Roman shook his head. “You’re not Virgil,” he muttered. “Your tricks won’t stop me from getting the rarely-heard truth out of you any way that I can.”

“No, no it’s me!” Virgil’s voice came in panicked gasps from between Deceit’s lips. “Roman it’s me please, it’s hurting my throat…” He reached up and gently gripped the prince’s hand.

The prince’s eyes flickered with worry for a moment, his hand almost wavering before the gloved fingers curling around his wrist shook Roman out of it. “Shut the fuck up, snake! Stop using his voice before I make you.” He tightened his grip, lifting Deceit slightly and pinning him against the wall like that. “Are you ready to tell me what you did to Virgil?” Roman asked as the snake’s feet struggled in an attempt to reach the floor. He loosened his hold ever so slightly when Deceit attempted to say something.

After a few deep breaths, Deceit spat in his face. “Do your worst. I will talk.”

It was as if a shadow passed over Roman’s face. “Oh, trust me Deceit. You will talk, even if it’s the only truth to ever come through your lips.”

***

_ While Deceit had been lying, trying to manipulate Roman with Virgil’s voice, there was one slight truth to what had been said… Virgil could see, hear, and almost feel everything that happened. _

_ He winced and whimpered and flinched, but he couldn’t seem to look away, to tear his eyes from the image of Roman, slightly blurry through his tears, though that wasn’t the only reason that he was near unrecognizable. _

_ “Roman… Roman please,” his own voice begged. He actually wasn’t quite sure if it was coming from himself or from Deceit at this point, and it didn’t really seem to matter; Roman completely ignored it either way. If it was Virgil, the prince couldn’t hear him... and when Deceit used his voice it only seemed to urge Roman on, to hit harder, his face becoming a mask of anger with gleaming red eyes that terrified Virgil. _

_ “Roman… Roman!” _

***

”Roman, stop!”

His hand froze in mid air, not of his own accord. His entire body seemed to be on pause in fact. Thomas had overridden him the same way he had Deceit. Why had he--

Roman’s eyes drifted from the lying trait’s bruised face and bloody nose over to the hand poised in the air. He had subconsciously summoned a knife that was now aimed just about for Deceit’s neck.

“Step back,” Thomas whispered.

Roman’s feet moved by themselves, carrying him backwards away from the lying trait, who slumped against the wall and held his arm. Roman had managed to do quite a bit of damage to him with just his fists… and nails, it seemed. He was horrified to notice traces of blood and skin underneath his fingernails on the hand still shakily gripping the knife. When Thomas let go of control, Roman’s hand went limp and the weapon fell from his fingers. It clattered to the ground before simply fading to nothing.

Roman’s eyes flickered and quickly faded back to brown. “I… I didn’t mean to…” he murmured. “…I was just trying to get Virgil back, then… then it went blank...”

Thomas moved a bit closer to the prince and gently held his arms. “Your eyes went red, Roman.”

“That hasn’t happened since the lying video,” Logan said quietly. “You need to learn to keep your anger in check, otherwise I’m sure Deceit will gladly continue to abuse it. He clearly, while not necessarily enjoying you causing him physical harm… or technically aphysical harm, I suppose, since we aren’t truly corporeal outside of the bounds of Thomas’s mental projections. Which is interesting because his friends can still--sorry,” he said quickly, noticing the impatience of Roman’s face as he veered off topic. “The point I was making is, you attacking Deceit seems to have negative outcomes in every way. You do not get what you want, and you simply inconvenience him in the meantime until he heals.”

He rubbed his eyes and shook his head slightly. “You’re right, of course… So how do we find Virgil?”

After a short silence, Thomas stood. “…I think I might know how.” He walked over to Deceit. “Where is Virgil?”

Roman shook his head. “That’s not going to work, he can just pick any place, like--“

“He’s in his room.”

Thomas nodded slightly. “I guessed that might be the case. Which is why my real question is… Deceit, where  _ isn’t  _ he?”

It looked as if Deceit was gritting his teeth, clenching his jaw shut. After a moment of struggle he said “--he’s not in a room I created off of the imagination.”

Roman’s eyes grew wider. “…Like a bubble universe feeding off of the creativity of imagination central.”

“Incorrect,” Deceit muttered.

Roman sank down. When he appeared in the mindscape, he was already running.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoop whoop another chapter posted  
> A warning/reassurance depending on how you feel right now, I'm pretty sure that this work will end up being around 40 chapters. So about three or four more weeks until this giant project of mine is done  
> ...Wow  
> Anyway, take care if yourselves, make good choices, comment please? I love talking to y'all  
> -Ro


	34. But I Rescued You...

A small crack appeared in the center of the wall where Roman had deduced that Deceit had put the room. With another hit, the wall cracked more before it burst wide open.

The prince charged in with his sword, ready to fight whatever might be guarding Virgil, but the room was empty other than a chair that Virgil was tied to and a blank screen. The prince moved close. “Virgil, Virgil I’m here--”

He was cut off by a sob. Roman faltered when the he saw that his love’s forearms were torn and rubbed raw and that Virgil’s face was stained with tears. “...Oh sweetheart it’s okay, I’m here now and we’ll get you out of here.” Roman tried to undo the ropes, but he couldn’t get any of them loose. When he had struggled against them furiously to no avail, he summoned a knife to cut through them and was slightly shocked when Virgil whimpered and flinched away. “It’s just me, Virgil, I’m not going to hurt you,” Roman said softly as he cut away the ropes... perhaps Deceit had used his image when he was capturing Virgil...

Patton and Logan rushed in as the prince cut through the last of the restraints and stepped back slightly. Roman was surprised that, when released, Virgil ran right past him and threw himself into Patton’s arms instead, still sobbing. The fatherly side held him close and stroked his hair. “Hey, kiddo, we’re here, you’re safe now...” he mumbled. “Why don’t we get back to the main mindscape now, does that sound good?”

Virgil nodded very slightly, and the four of them slowly headed out and down the hall. Virgil leaned on Patton so much as they walked that the fatherly trait was all but carrying him along the hall towards the living room. Roman paused behind them and thought for a moment about what to do before he simply closed up the hole in the wall, leaving the room there for now and resolving to figure out what to do about it soon before following the other sides back to their living room.

Patton rubbed Virgil’s back as they sat down on the couch. “It’s okay, kiddo. You’re okay, we’re all okay too. Everything is going to be okay... Is there anything that I could get for you? Something that might help make you feel better?” he asked as he gently wiped the tears from Virgil’s face.

“Could you maybe get me m’ sweater?” Virgil mumbled, shivering and holding his bare arms close. He winced slightly at the simple pressure against the parts of his wrists that had been rubbed raw by the tight ropes.

Patton nodded and kissed the top of his head in a parental way, giving a worried look to Virgil’s wrists, which he seemed to be trying to hide. He frowned at the slight bruising and the clearly sore redness. “Of course I can, kiddo. I’ll be right back, and Logan will take care of the marks on your wrists while I go grab it for you, m’kay?” 

He went off to the bedrooms. Logan knelt next to Virgil, inspecting the rope burn and raw patches on his wrists with a first aid kit open next to him. And Roman just stood there for a moment, unsure what he was supposed to do. He was honestly still slightly shocked that Virgil had gone past him to Patton for comfort. After all, the prince was his boyfriend, not to mention he had been the one to actually save him.

Patton came back at the same time as Logan finished gently wrapping Virgil’s wrists in bandages. “Here you are, kiddo, one very comfy hoodie.” He wrapped it around the anxious side’s shoulders. “Why don’t I get you something to eat, and maybe a nice cup of tea, too?”

“Not hungry,” Virgil said quietly without looking up at any of them as he slipped his arms into the sleeves.

“Well then I’ll get just the tea and maybe a little snack, then if you change your mind you’ll have something nearby that you can nibble on. Besides, you should probably have something to eat soon, kiddo.” The moral side headed to the kitchen and Logan packed up the first aid kit again. He took it back to the bathroom, leaving Roman and Virgil alone in the living room.

“Hey, you...” Roman sat on the couch, shocked when again, Virgil shifted away from him slightly without making eye contact. “Virgil? What’s wrong? It’s just me...” he said softly. “You know that you can tell me anything?”

Virgil looked away, but whatever he might have been about to say in response was cut off as Patton came back with a steaming cup of tea. “Here you are, kiddo. I already put in some milk and sugar for you.” Virgil mumbled an almost silent thank you to him and stared into the cup, watching the steam rise in swirling patterns and just holding the warm mug between his hands rather than actually drinking from it just yet. He also ignored the plate with cookies that Patton had set on the coffee table in front of him.

Logan returned shortly and surveyed the room before asking, “Is there anything we can do that would help you to feel more comfortable, Virgil?”

He slowly looked up, shrugging slightly in response. “...I really don’t know, Logan. I appreciate you trying to help, though.” Virgil set the cup down on the coffee table and curled into himself. The anxious side glanced away quickly, not wanting to draw attention to how pale his skin might be or the black streaks down his cheeks from his eyeshadow.

Patton nodded slightly. “...Maybe we could all benefit from having a nice, quiet evening, followed by an early night,” he suggested. “I’ll go make dinner, and I’m sure that if you need anything, kiddo, Logan or Roman would be more than happy to get it for you.” Virgil decided not to continue arguing that he wasn’t hungry and just nodded slightly. Patton headed back to the kitchen, leaving the living room in relative silence with Roman and Virgil on opposite sides of the couch and Logan standing slightly awkwardly.

Dinner passed by in a blur for Virgil, with him barely registering the taste of the comfort food Patton had definitely made for his benefit or the subjects of awkward small talk that the other three chatted about to break up the mostly quiet meal. He stared at his plate almost the entire time, not seeing how the other sides all kept glancing over towards him in concern, or tried to gently urge him into conversation. Virgil just silently ate until his plate was empty, and even that was mostly so that Patton wouldn’t be concerned... 

And it was also the first meal in a month where he didn’t seem focused on how much Roman was eating either. Virgil didn’t look at the prince a single time.

“...Virgil? Think it’s time for bed now, kiddo?” Patton asked, thinking that the anxious side looked shaken and exhausted, both emotionally and physically, when all the plates were empty and they had just been sitting in silence for a moment. Virgil nodded slightly and wrapped his arms around himself.

Roman offered to clear up from dinner while they got ready for bed, so he collected up all of their plates as the other three headed down the hall. He washed all the dishes and wiped down the counters, then put the leftovers in the fridge before walking down towards their rooms. He frowned slightly when he couldn’t find Virgil in either his own room or Roman’s, then he slowly headed down further. 

He saw that Patton’s door was open slightly, and he quietly leaned a bit closer. Virgil was curled up against Patton, who ran a hand through his hair and talked softly. Roman couldn’t tell what was being said. He shrugged very slightly and looked back at their rooms. Patton was there with Virgil now, so Roman should obviously let him have his space until he had calmed down... which room should he wait for Virgil in?

Roman’s guess was that Virgil wouldn’t want to spend a night in his anxiety-amplifying room after a day like this one, so he went back to his own room, humming softly to himself in an attempt to keep himself calmer. He sat down on his bed after changing the lights to just give a soft glow and picking up the book from his bedside table. He leaned back against the headboard and opened it, deciding that he would read until Virgil showed up so they could cuddle close and go to sleep. Roman smiled to himself at the thought of holding his love close and kissing him on the verge of sleep as he flipped to where he had left off the last time he read. He had just started the book recently, plenty of chapters still left to read, so he wasn’t too worried about the possibility of it taking longer than that for Virgil to show up.

He finished the book with still no sign of the anxious trait.

Roman frowned a bit as he set down the book and got up, resolving to go check on his boyfriend again, check if he was still in Patton’s room and if he needed any help. Perhaps the two of them had looked something up on Youtube and ended up falling down a rabbit hole of animal videos--it wouldn’t be the first time, Roman thought and chuckled softly.

He walked quietly down the hall and saw that the main light in Patton’s room was no longer on, just the soft glow of a night light. He very slowly pushed the door open more.

Virgil was there, surrounded by stuffed animal and blankets, buried underneath piles of pastel coloured pillows as well as in the fatherly trait’s arms. His head was tucked under Patton’s chin and the moral side’s hand was resting against the back of Virgil’s head, as if he had fallen asleep still stroking it through his hair.

Roman backed away slightly, then went to Logan’s room, where he saw that the other was in fact still awake and bent over his desk. The prince knocked slightly before heading into the room. “Logan, do you know where Virgil is?”

The logical side avoided his eyes ever so slightly. “I believe that he is with Patton; at least, that is where I last saw him. I would suggest that you do not interrupt them,” Logan added quickly. “...It is fairly late and they may be asleep now.”

“I already checked... yeah, they're asleep.” Roman took a seat on Logan’s bed. “...Do you know why he seems to be avoiding me, Logan? It’s felt that way since we rescued him...”

Logan hesitated, then shifted to face Roman. “I do know what happened, in fact...” He bit his lip slightly as he tried to find words to tell Roman the truth, but that wouldn’t seem too harsh. “Roman, what was in the room with Virgil when we found him?” he asked.

“...A TV.”

“Exactly, a television screen. It was being powered by the imagination, meaning that Deceit could probably show whatever he wanted to on it. So that television was probably not simply showing him animated cartoons. What might Deceit have been feeding to Virgil that would make him react this way?”

Roman frowned in thought, then froze. “...Oh. Oh.”

Virgil had seen him when he lost control. Virgil was scared of the possibility that Roman would hurt him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Virgil has been rescued from the holds of Deceit... but fear can follow you anywhere  
> Take care of yourselves, comment typos you see or just screaming at me if you want to (just pls comment you're all so sweet and I love talking to you guys)  
> -Ro


	35. A Needed Conversation...

The prince didn’t sleep much that night, spending a long time tossing and turning in his bed. Virgil had seen him get dangerously close to completely losing it again, and was scared of what Roman could become...  was afraid of the violence that came out when Roman blanked out like that, when rage took over, and he hadn’t even seen the worst of it; the prince shivered at the memory of the first time that he had lost control on Deceit. He was honestly scared of it, too, scared of the blank spot in his memory when his vision had gone completely red, scared of the feeling when he regained his control and saw the damage that had been wreaked in his moment of mental absence--though that wasn’t actually true. That was the worst part, that this time he remembered it all, could feel deceit struggling underneath him as he...

Of course he knew what he had to do to actually make this better--talk to Virgil about it. He had to listen to Virgil’s worries and explain his side, assure him that everything would be okay, that he was still safe and loved and cared for. When Virgil felt safe again, that would be when everything could start to go back to normal.

Roman rolled over after that and slept for a few hours, feeling slightly more secure in the knowledge of his plan.

He woke up quite early the next morning, getting dressed and tilting his head a bit as he looked in the mirror. The prince fixed his hair slightly and considered whether or not he should put on a bit of makeup, and shook his head slightly. Roman took a small breath and calmed himself a bit more before heading down the hall to the main rooms. 

He didn’t want to approach Virgil before he was ready to talk, to make him feel cornered or trapped, so the best thing to do would probably be to stay in the main rooms that they all frequented so that the anxious trait could start the conversation when he felt ready instead of Roman pushing it on him. He poured himself a cup of coffee to supplement the very little sleep he had gotten the previous night and grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl before walking to sit in the living room, ready to wait for Virgil.

The prince sat slightly curled up on the couch with his cup, apple, and phone, ready to just sit and wait for Virgil to come to him when he was ready to talk. He settled in to a comfortable position and pulled up Instagram on his phone, taking a sip of his coffee.

***

Virgil woke up snuggled comfortably in gentle arms. He smiled softly and almost leaned up to automatically kiss the other before he realized that he had stayed in Patton’s room last night, not with Roman. And with that, all of the memories of the previous day came back quickly, along with the amplified anxiety that the moral side’s room could bring out. He knew that could happen, of course, but he just needed some comfort and was not ready to put all his trust in Roman yet, after...

He slipped out of the bed slowly and quietly, being very careful not to disturb the still sleeping Patton, and went to the bathroom. Virgil took a shower--or more realistically, stood under the spray of water turned as hot as he could bear for twenty minutes, no coherent thoughts running through his mind before he actually started to slowly wash his body, though that was still done mostly subconsciously. His fingers were like prunes and the room was a sauna when he got out over an hour after stepping into the water--living in someone’s mind included the perk that hot water didn’t ever run out--but he didn’t care.

Virgil left the bathroom wrapped up in a large towel, skin still so hot from the water that steam rose from his arms for a bit as he walked slowly and quietly down the hall to his room. After throwing on jeans and his hoodie, he carefully did his makeup with slightly shaky hands. He put on a bit more foundation than he had in a while to disguise how pale his face might be, following that up by making the stylized bags under his eyes bigger and darker than usual to try and disguise how little rest he had actually gotten from the previous night’s sleep. As he worked, he was trying to think about what he was going to say to Roman. 

Would he be offended that Virgil hadn’t slept with him last night? Should he try to explain what was wrong in his mind or wait for Roman or maybe one of the others to bring it up?... Would Roman be offended that Virgil had that sort of worry, insist that nothing that bad had happened and he was overreacting? No, of course not, Roman wasn’t like that... although he hadn’t thought Roman was like this either.

He looked at himself in the mirror to fix his hair into something that was mildly presentable and did a few rounds of steady breathing--in for four seconds, hold for seven, and breathe out for eight seconds--to calm his heart rate, which was already starting to pick up. Then he evened out the black under his eyes slightly before pulling his hoodie closer to himself and heading to the main space, if not confident about speaking to Roman at least finally feeling that he might be ready.

Roman was sitting in the living room when Virgil walked in, empty coffee cup and an apple core sitting on the coffee table in front of him as he scrolled through his phone. He looked up and smiled brightly when Virgil came in, though the expression fell slightly when the anxious side avoided eye contact and sat just close enough that he could say he was next to him while still leaving space. “Hey there, my prince...”

He could immediately tell that Virgil was still not feeling comfortable, from his body language as well as the changes in his makeup. The prince had been paying close attention and talking sincerely with Virgil enough to know that the seemingly small changes were there as almost a barrier, and he couldn’t just sit there and say nothing about it. “...You don’t have to pretend everything is fine.” Roman moved a little bit closer to Virgil. “Darling, I know that something’s wrong. I know what’s wrong.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Ro, there isn’t anything wrong now that... well, I’m safe with you guys...”

“You saw,” Roman said quietly.

Virgil looked up at him. “You know?”

“Logan told me, but I really don’t know what it was. How... how did you see it? From near him, or?...”

“From his point of view. From his eyes... I had a front row seat to everything that happened yesterday... to everything that you did to him.”

“Virgil baby, I’m so sorry. You know I’d never hurt you, right?”

Virgil pulled his hoodie closer. “Of course I don’t expect you to ever hurt me, but...” He shivered at the memory of those soulless red eyes, the look of grim efficiency. The face that he usually loved so much, but twisted in the most horribly familiar way... still oh so similar, but so very wrong as well. “But Roman, my amazing prince, dearest hero, I... that wasn’t you. It just wasn’t. Not your eyes, not your compassion, not your voice... not you.” 

Roman frowned slightly. “Sweetheart... I understand, but it is just me. That may have happened, but nothing like that would ever be directed at you, ever. I love you so so much and I would never--”

Virgil looked down. “If it wasn’t you, then how can I trust... that? Whoever it was? And if it was you... that version of you would hurt me, it didn’t matter that you could hear my voice begging, it didn’t stop...”

The prince shook his head slightly, shock flickering in his eyes. “But that wasn’t actually you, and it would never happen if it was really you, Virgil. I would never hurt you, or let you be hurt. I wouldn’t!...” Roman reached for his arm.

Virgil flinched slightly, and Roman felt a pang of heartbreak as he saw a flash of fear in the anxious side’s eyes.

“...I’m sorry Ro, I just don’t know if... if I can feel comfortable when that can just happen... and you can’t control when it happens either, can you?”

The prince’s face fell. “Virgil... what are you saying?”

“I... I guess...” He stared at the ground and bit his lip. “...I guess what I’m saying is that maybe we need to take a break...”

With those words, the delicate happiness that had been slowly formed in the past month shattered. Roman stared. “Y-you... you don’t mean that, angel... Come on, it’s nothing--”

“But it is something, Roman!” Virgil said loudly. “It is something very big to me, because I’ve been promised that before. There was someone who told me that something that happened to me wasn’t a big deal, ignored when I tried to tell him how I felt. He told me to trust him, he said it was nothing, that it would never happen again, that it wasn’t something to worry about. Do you know who that was?”

Roman stayed silent. Of course he knew who Virgil was talking about. Who else would it be?

“So... so yes, I mean it. I just can’t, I just can’t right now Roman and I’m sorry, okay? But I...”

“...If that is what you feel needs to happen,” Roman said softly, “then I understand. I’m not happy, but I care about you. So if that is what you need.”

“It is,” Virgil whispered. He got up and ran to his room quickly so that Roman couldn’t see the tears that were forming in his eyes, threatening to fall down his face.

Roman was very tempted to run after him, to beg for some kind of chance, to ask if there was anything at all that he could do that would lead to a different outcome... but he didn't. He stayed sat on the couch staring in the direction that Virgil had gone, shocked into silence by the events that he couldn’t have anticipated at all.

Patton walked in a moment later, looking concerned. “Hey Roman, I’m pretty sure Virgil just started crying when I asked what was going on, if he wasn’t crying already... and he ran away without answering me... do you know what’s up with him right now? Is it still about yesterday?”

“Well, yeah... I guess it is in a way, but probably not what you’re thinking about at the moment...” Roman shrugged slightly and tried to keep his voice even, despite it feeling like his world had just shattered in the span of three minutes. “...I think... I’m pretty sure that Virgil just broke up with me,” he whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp...  
> :) :) :)  
> I hope you're not too mad at me?  
> Take care of yourselves and get enough sleep  
> -Ro


	36. Alone Now

Thomas, Logan, and Patton were gathered in the living room, sitting close together instead of in their usual video positions; Thomas sat on the couch, Logan in the chair next to him and Patton cross-legged on the floor. They were sitting slightly awkwardly in silence, waiting for the others. Patton had been sent to collect both of the other main sides and said they were wanted to come brainstorm for a problem that Thomas had, but neither of them had shown up quite yet.

Patton tapped his fingers against the floor and looked up at the others. “Roman said that he was on his way, but he wasn’t camera ready yet. Virgil... He answered, but I guess he never really said that he’d come to help. I don’t think he’d ever duck out on us again after last time, though, since he has talked to us before about it and apologized profusely for that.”

“...I think they might be hoping that we’ll solve it without them in an attempt to avoid each other,” Logan said quietly. “I have not seen Roman in the main mindscape in the past week; I believe that if he comes out of his room, he does it either very early or very late in an attempt to avoid having to see Virgil.”

“That’s not what I’m doing.”

They all looked behind them to see Roman standing in the center of the room, where he had just risen up. He looked very emotionally worn down, and his cheekbones looked sharper and more pronounced than they had appeared since his little surgery and climb to recovery. He gave a weak smile as Patton jumped up slightly.

“Roman!” Patton said. His voice was forcefully cheerful until Logan caught his eye and shook his head very slightly. At that, Patton seemed to deflate a bit and gave Roman a sad, sympathetic smile instead. “...How are you doing, kiddo?” he asked in a more subdued tone.

“I’ve actually been spending most of my time in the imagination,” the prince said quietly. “Trying to... see if I can work out some things. My go to in the past has been grand gestures, but... that’s probably not what can fix this issue, if it will get fixed.”

“Roman?!” Thomas looked shocked. “ _ If _ it gets fixed? Haven’t you always been the one rooting for for love, believing in it and?... What happened that’s changed you so much?”

“Well, guess experiences can change you an awful lot,” Roman said grimly. “Don’t get me wrong, I still love him with all of my heart and don’t plan on giving up on Virgil at all, but... I guess I don’t necessarily expect him to take me back. He’s not the type of person to be wooed by a grand gesture or eloquent speeches.” The prince cleared his throat. “Anyway, I was told that we were here to help Thomas with something? We could switch to that topic now. Please.”

Logan nodded. “Indeed. I believe that we are planning to wait for Virgil as well, though,” he said. "So that all of us could speak together about the issues Thomas has been having."

Roman nodded slightly, looking away from the other three. “...Alright, do I get to know the problem though? So that I can start brainstorming things that could help for you?”

Logan and Patton both looked at Thomas, who sighed softly. “Of course you can, Roman... but I don’t want you to take what the problem is too hard, okay? We all agree that it’s not entirely your fault, and we don’t want you to feel like it is.”

Roman looked slightly confused, but he was pretty sure he knew where this was going from them starting off with that. He nodded.

He sighed softly. “I’ve been having trouble with creativity again. Not necessarily not having any ideas, but well... you know, kind of having ideas that feel like they have less emotion, or feel less exciting to work on, or that Joan agrees don’t work well in execution or...”

“...Ah. I see.” Roman nodded slightly. How exactly was problems with creativity and ideas not absolutely his fault? “And we currently don’t have any plans or ideas for how to change it?”

Thomas shrugged slightly and looked at Logan, who took a small breath and straightened his tie, attempting to appear more professional and impartial.

“Well, we had a couple of possible ideas, but thought that it was probably it was a good idea for us to wait for you, as Thomas’s creativity, to tell us what you thought and if there was anything that you felt was going on that could be affecting this.”

Roman glanced at Thomas, then Logan. “Have you told him?”

“Only that something significant happened between you and Virgil. I did not want to overshare something that is your business, not mine, so I left it for you to decide how much you feel comfortable with sharing or talking about at this time.”

Thomas patted the spot next to him on the couch. “Did the two of you have a fight or something?”

Roman sighed as he sat down. “Well, turns out that when Virgil was cooped up by the snake--I... I mean Deceit, he could see and hear what Deceit did... so he saw the receiving end of me... being out of control, which I had been trying not to let happen even in front of him... I’m not proud of that side of myself, and I didn’t want him to see that.”

***

Virgil sank down slowly again, careful not to draw the attention of any of the other four. He had peeked up to see if the conversation was already underway, but he had just seen Roman--handsome, amazing, strong Roman who had been recovering--standing there, looking unusually small with his wings folded against his body instead of spread slightly for balance. He had shown up just in time to hear Roman basically saying that Virgil had ruined his fanciful and cheery outlook on love before carefully leaving again, not wanting to be noticed and drawn in to the conversation.

He walked down the hall of the mindscape, then slowly sped up to a run, tears in his eyes as he shut and locked his bedroom door behind him. He slid down the door, not even bothering to take the few steps to his bed, and hid his face in his hands, shaking his head slightly.

It’s not like he was happy with the decision he had had to make, but it was what had to be done... he couldn’t have another relationship with that fear now that he knew what really being happy felt like. Which was ironic, because seeing Roman like that made him feel awful. He definitely still loved Roman, which was the worst part--loving someone that scared you like that.

Virgil slowly got up and went to sit on his bed, grabbing his phone and headphones from his side table. He put on some loud music, essentially trying to drown out the million different thoughts screaming through his head at that moment, and pulled the blanket over his head to dampen the already dim light in his room more, leaving his phone as the only light.

It started with scrolling through Tumblr in an attempt to stimulate his mind just enough to keep his thoughts from wandering, but somehow he tuned in to realize that he was now somehow in his photo album. He frowned as he saw a thumbnail that he didn’t recognize or remember, marked as a video. Virgil hesitantly tapped on it and his music cut out as the video started loading.

After a moment of a black screen, Roman’s smiling face appeared. “Hey there, my dear little angel,” he said softly. Virgil bit his lip slightly. “I know you always hate it when I take your phone, but you ask me far too often why I love you and well...” The camera shifted for a minute to show Virgil himself fast asleep, snuggled in Roman’s red sweatshirt. “Now seems like as good a time as any, since you can’t currently interrupt or argue with me.” Roman tilted the phone back to show his own face again. “Where to even start...” He grinned wider.

“You have the most gorgeous eyes that light up when you smile. That’s part of why I act so silly and dramatic around you--yes, I know when I’m doing that,” he chuckled softly. “I am in fact even doing it intentionally. And whenever you smile in response it makes it all worth it. Your smile can make my heart stop, and a classic romantic though I may be, i am not swayed or swooning that easily most of the time, darling.” The prince winked and blew a kiss to him through the camera.

“Then there’s simply how absolutely, undeniably, and excessively gorgeous you are. Ah ah ah, I can hear you arguing with me through the time-space continuum, Virgil Sanders, but no! No, you are in fact very beautiful. Look.” The camera moved again, zooming in on the anxious side’s face. “You can’t say that you don’t like freckles, because I have heard you tell Patton that his are cute. Look at that beautiful, soft jawline, look at those perfect lips, that absolutely handsome man that I have the privilege of dating.” Virgil blushed, protests on the tip of his tongue, but Roman couldn’t actually hear him... and if he was being honest, though he didn’t agree with those things when said about him, the person Roman was describing sounded attractive, and if he looked at the screen, at his face, he wasn’t... completely wrong.

“You honestly have such a gorgeous face, my dearest. Look at you, look at how cute and sweet you look!--” Roman stopped talking immediately as Virgil made a quiet groaning sound and rolled over. “...Whoops,” the prince breathed. “Guess that I should keep my voice down a little more... I don’t want to disturb my perfect sleeping angel,” he said with a very soft chuckle. “My point was that you look that beautiful all of the time.”

The camera moved once more, Roman smiling at him more sadly than before. “As I know you still probably feel like arguing, I’ll say something else that I wouldn’t be able to in front of you... as much as you may insist it, I am not a hero. I’m just not. I just pretend to be, I do the wrong thing often and I couldn’t even save you properly... the classic hero move, to rescue their love from the terrible monster, and it ended with me unconscious and you looking after me for ages.” He smiled sadly and looked away from the phone camera, in the direction of where his Virgil was lying. “But when I’m with you... when I can see your face and the way that you look at me... it makes me want to be a real hero. For you.” Virgil’s breath caught in his throat at the expression on Roman’s face. A single tear slipped down the prince’s cheek.

“Okay sweetheart,” Roman said after clearing his throat slightly and wiping away the tear from his face. He glanced back in the direction that meant he was looking at a sleeping Virgil and the smile returned to his face, if a bit smaller than before. “I don’t want to actually wake you up by rambling for too long about what I love about you, and if I continue on this tangent I’ll probably cry and wake you up like that... so I’m going to end this video shortly. I hope that this made you happy at all, it was just meant to make you smile when looking through your phone. I love you,” he whispered with a bigger smile, blowing a kiss to the camera before the screen went black again. 

He sat there for long enough that it automatically turned off, the anxious side simply lying in the silence and dark for a while as he attempted to process all of what he had just watched and heard.

Then Virgil held his phone close to his chest and sobbed silently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, looks like neither of them are holding up well... why am I so mean to them?  
> The next chapter is going to involve some help from a friend of mine, so it may be a little later than usual but I hope to get it out on Wednesday at the latest. I hope you'll all enjoy it :)  
> Take care of yourselves   
> -Ro


	37. Adventure and Emotion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha I got it up on time!
> 
> Warning that this chapter will contain spoilers for Adventure Time

Roman sighed softly to himself as he headed down the hallway in the imagination. He kept going back and forth on whether or not this was a good idea, but he had resolved that this would be the easiest way to get help. He shook his head slightly and walked through the door next to the imagination, glancing at the plaque with the word “Characters” written on the front.

“Girl! What has brought you to our neck of the woods?” an arm wrapped around the prince’s shoulders as a familiar, slightly cocky character grinned at him, then tilted his head. “You don’t look so cheery, babe.”

“Hey there, Remy...” Roman smiled a little weakly at him. “I’m actually looking for someone specific today...” He quickly explained why he had come. “So... can you tell me where to find him?”

Remy nodded, pointing him in the right direction. “Yeah, his room’s over there. Head that way, but you should totally come back here some time to just hang out, handsome. I’ll come chat with y’all when I do my next Starbucks run, okay? And I’ll bring you your half caff with extra caramel.”

“Starbucks orders are the only thing you actually work to remember, aren’t they?” Roman joked. He smiled a little more and nodded. “...Thanks, man. I’ll see you later.”

He slowly walked through the character area in the direction that Remy had directed him, waving slightly to a few of the different month characters and a small gaggle of short video stars, until he reached another room within the area, with a small metal plate on the door. He knocked and slowly the door when a cheery “Come in!” echoed from behind it.

“...Hello, Dr. Picani,” the prince said as he sat down in front of the character, who smiled back at him and set down his little book that he’d been writing in. “Thank you for agreeing to help me.”

“Well of course! It is my job,” Emile Picani said with another smile, then leaned a bit closer to the prince. “So, Roman, what was the problem that you wanted my help with today?”

Roman sighed and looked down. “Well... anger issues, really.”

The therapist nodded slightly. “Mhm... Care to elaborate for me?” He picked the book up again and opened it to a new page.

He bit his lip and nodded slightly, giving Dr. Picani a short explanation.

“I’ve been having some problems, and it gets to the point sometimes... has happened a few times and I came close some more... where I would get really angry about something. When it gets really bad like I said, there’s a problem and I don’t actually know what happens because I... kind of blacked out, but the others tell me that my eyes went red and I’ve seen for myself that when it happened, I tended to cause a lot of chaos. And destruction.” Roman sighed and looked away, rubbing his eyes and confessing the real reason he had finally come here to see the therapist.

“I decided that I really had to get help when... when I pushed Virgil away from me because I got so bad that he... that he didn’t really trust me anymore. I... I just didn’t know what to do other than come to you, Emile,” Roman said quietly.

“Well, seeking out the help you feel you need is a big step in the right direction, Roman,” Dr. Picani said with a small smile. “But you shouldn’t just be doing it for others. You should be doing it for yourself too, you know that right?”

The prince sighed slightly and nodded. “Yeah, I know Doctor...” He looked away and sighed. “And I do want to do it for myself. I just... don’t know if I realized quite how bad it was until Virgil told me he...”

The therapist nodded again and wrote something in his little book. “Well, since you’re a hero worried about these kind of anger problems, why don’t we look at the world and adventures of another hero--good old Finn the human from Adventure Time?”

Roman frowned slightly in confusion. “He has anger issues? I... haven’t really watched it.”

“You haven’t?! Well goodness gracious the two of us should watch it some time, it’s so good! But I digress.” Dr. Picani became a bit more serious, then leaned in. “...Are you okay if I say a couple of spoilers?”

“Whatever you feel can help me, Doc.” The prince shrugged and smiled softly. “I won’t get upset at spoilers.”

“Well, Finn was not the one I was talking about, but let me explain the show a little first.” Picani nodded and beamed. “Alright, here we go then!” He sat up a bit straighter.

“So Adventure Time is a cartoon that is mainly about a human teenager named Finn, who for a lot of the series is thought to be the only human left. He, surprise! goes on a lot of adventures during the series, quite a lot of them having to do with fighting or killing different monsters through the land of Ooo, where the show takes place. His closest companion is Jake the dog, who is also his adoptive brother, but there are many other characters who you often see around, including Princess Bubblegum, Marceline the Vampire Queen, and the Ice King. He, I think, is the one that your situation can be mirrored to, in a sense.”

“The Ice King?” Roman shifted a little closer to the edge of his seat.

“Yes, indeed, but before I start talking about him I want you to be ready to hear me out, because his character does not start at the beginning of this story,” Picani warned gently. “Now, originally within the show, the Ice King seems to be little more than an over-the-top, not incredibly complex villain. He spends a lot of time capturing princesses, specifically Princess Bubblegum, early in the series, though in general as an antagonist is seen as not much of a bother, even to Princess Bubblegum. Later we find out that he is actually kind-hearted, if with a twisted sense of morals. He is also misunderstood, has skewed senses of social behaviour, and suffering from memory loss. The memory loss comes from the same source that gives him his powers: his Ice Crown.”

“His crown? It gives him his powers?”

“Exactly. That is what I actually see as your current problem matching up with. Further in the series, we find out from Marceline that almost a thousand years ago, the Ice King was not in fact originally an Ice Wizard. He was once a human named Simon Petrikov, a man studying in hopes of being a specialist of ancient artifacts. Around the time of the Mushroom War, an apocalyptic event that caused the near-extinction of humans throughout the land of Ooo, Simon found Marceline crying in the wreckage and gave her a stuffed toy to comfort her. He became her caregiver and close friend, looking after her and protecting her until eventually he abandoned her due to fear of how safe he could actually keep her with what was happening to him.”

“Well why didn’t he just take off the crown?” Roman asked. “Was it cursed and impossible to remove?”

“Actually, no. the Ice Crown was an awful thing for Simon, ever since he came into its possession. He bought it one day from a strange, Scandanavian dock worker, not knowing what it was, and accidentally frightened off his fiancee when the crown caused him to experience strange visions and changed him to be less himself. He never saw or heard from her ever again, and the crown twisted his mind and body to the point where as the Ice King his species is referred to as ‘Wizard.’ But the reason he kept putting on the crown within the flashbacks we see of him was _to protect Marceline_.

“In the episode ‘Simon and Marcy,’ Finn and Jake ask Marceline why she invited the Ice King to come play basketball with them, and while she is explaining to them why she likes having the Ice King around, and we see a flashback from far in their past. The two of them are shown to have been companions together in the early days after the Mushroom War, when Marceline was a small child. They are travelling together through a wrecked city when there’s suddenly a loud rustling sound. Simon, who at this point looks more human than he does as the Ice King, but not fully human, hides Marceline in a car and tells her to stay there. She protests and asks him not to put it on, but he promises her he can control it. Then Simon puts on the crown to face the possible danger and it starts to take over. Even when it turns out to just be a deer, since Simon is under the control of the Ice Crown he doesn’t ease at that. Instead, he freezes it solid and brushes Marceline away when she tries to tell him to stop. It isn’t until Marceline hits it off of his head that he goes back to normal again, and she tells him worriedly that he’s getting worse, and his hair and nose are longer, showing that she’s seen the change in him happen before. After a moment, when he comes back to himself as the Crown’s control on him fades, Simon promises her that he won’t put the crown on again, but... some promises can be hard to keep. In fact, later in that very same flashback, Simon and Marceline get surrounded by mutant slime monsters while he is looking for soup to give to her, and Simon puts the crown on again, to protect her. He sings a song he was using to cheer Marceline up the previous night to try and keep himself tethered, but when he takes the crown off that time most of the effects don’t end up going away.”

“...You think that that’s me?” Roman said quietly, fiddling with the ends of his sleeves.

“I think that you are like Simon, and I believe that both of you truly only did what you did to protect the ones you love.”

“...But you said that the Ice King lost his memories of what had happened?”

Picani nodded. “At the end of ‘Simon and Marcy,’ the Ice King tells Marceline to keep distracting the others so he can score in their game of basketball, showing that he doesn’t remember it as a true event. And in the season before that episode, during ‘I Remember You,’ the Ice King is asking Marceline to help him write a song he wants to sing for Princess Bubblegum and the other princesses of Ooo, and Marceline admits, even after getting angry at him, that she is in fact glad to see him. However, the Ice King misunderstands her feelings and tries to kiss her, and Marceline gets angry at him again, asking if he even remembers who he was. Ice King calls himself a writer and produces different pieces of paper containing what he claims to be lyrics. When Marceline looks at them they include memories of her and Simon’s past, and the words he thinks are lyrics are letters from him expressing his worry over her and him trying to protect her from the dangerous world, and also from himself. She sings his own words to him and he can’t even remember writing them, doesn’t even recognize the picture of himself from when he was fully human or his old name.”

The prince shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Do you really think that my anger could change me like that?” he asked.

“It isn’t a direct translation to your situation,” Emile said gently. “I am just using it as a loose comparison for you, but it is possible that something, probably less drastic but still significant, could shift from where you are at right now. I don’t think that is likely to happen at the moment, especially since you are here right now wanting to change yourself for the better. That is an important first step, as I said. So how about we discuss some possibilities of ways for you to work on it until our next session?”

“Please,” Roman said. “I don’t... don’t want this to get any worse than where it already is.”

The therapist smiled more. “Wonderful. I’m sure that we can find a way for you to control your anger or use it in a different way, like the time that instead of putting the Ice Crown on, Simon just used it to hit a slime monster over the head instead. although," he added, with a very serious tone, "we know that violence is never the answer. Now, why don’t we talk about what usually helps you to calm down?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't actually watched Adventure Time, so special thanks to my friend and also my amazing girlfriend for helping me with this, as well as a lot of help from the Adventure Time wiki  
> Also eeeeeee Picani I love him so much!!!!!!  
> -Ro


	38. Slow Climb

Virgil crept out of his room nearly silently, heading down the hall nervously on his way to get a drink and trying not to get the attention of anyone who might be in the main headscape. While Virgil had been spending some time hanging out with the logical and moral sides in their rooms--mostly to keep Patton from being too worried about how he was doing--the anxious side had taken to keeping to himself at times other than those. Ever since everything had happened with him, Deceit, and Roman, he wasn’t honestly sure who he was trying to avoid more between the two of them.

“Hello there, darling...” a voice purred, almost as if summoned by his worries.

Virgil bit his lip and shut the door of the fridge, turning to see who else but Deceit behind him, leaning against the door frame. He smiled with faux innocence at him. “What’s got you so happy? You don’t seem to have been hiding from me.”

“I’m not hiding,” Virgil mumbled, holding his bottle of water against his chest as he tried to slip past Deceit and escape down the hall, but the lying trait quickly shifted to fully block the door.

“Oh don’t come on now, kitten, lie to me...” he purred, voice silky and just a bit too sweet, like beautiful flowers set over a corpse. “Do not give me a little conversation before that wonderful boyfriend of yours kindly asks me to stay--”

“Roman isn’t my boyfriend anymore,” he whispered. “We’re... we’re broken up, at least for now. It wasn’t good for us.”

Deceit’s eyes widened. “Oh, kitten, I’m so terribly sorry!” he said with an almost sincere tone to his voice. “Of course, that’s not something that we expected might happen just a little bit... Now I’m shocked that you haven’t been hiding away.” As he spoke, his hands slowly moved up and set a gentle but definite grip on Virgil’s upper arms. 

Virgil tensed up a bit and shivered. “...Deceit, leave me alone. Please, I don’t want to talk to you.”

“I think you do.” He hissed slightly, a bit of persistence behind the lie as he tried to push the thought onto Virgil as well, leaning closer to the side who looked now more uncertain. “I think that I could help you feel better, stop you from missing him, my dearest kitten...”

Someone else cleared their throat. “I believe that he asked you to leave him alone,” Roman said quietly, but firmly. Virgil paled slightly at his voice. This was absolutely his worst nightmare at the moment.

“Oh, and this isn’t according to  _ you? _ ” Deceit turned, swiftly tucking Virgil under his arm slightly, arm wrapped tightly around his shoulders as if to hold him close, in reality keeping him from getting away without an obvious struggle. “From what I didn’t just hear, you’re very much a voice in what happens in darling Virgil’s life right now, chivalrous prince,” the said, snake tongue flicking out slightly at him.

Roman shook his head slightly. “I am not at all... but Virgil sure as hell is, and you’re not listening to what he wants right now. You need to back off.”

The lying side hissed at him, leaning a bit closer to the prince and still keeping a worried and uncomfortable-looking Virgil pressed against his side. “What are you going to do about it, princey?” he challenged darkly, a slight smirk spreading across his face.

Virgil tensed as Roman’s eyes flickered slightly, then he closed his eyes and let out a slow breath. His wings, which had been spread as if to make himself look bigger, slowly pulled back against his body. “...I will not do anything, because it is not my place...” he muttered, almost seeming to say it to himself. Then he opened his eyes and looked at Deceit with determined, hazel eyes. “But if you won’t leave Virgil alone, I will go to Thomas.” He stepped back slightly. “I’m sure he and Logan can figure out a way to keep Virgil feeling comfortable and keep you out of his space, and if they hear how little you’re respecting him right now, combined with your... history... they probably won’t be far too worried about your own comfort in that situation.”

Deceit hissed louder and peeled away from Virgil. “Fine then... I won’t leave your dearest, precious  _ friend  _ alone...” He let go of Virgil, sidling past Roman and out of the room. ”I won’t see you later, chivalrous one...”  he snarled quietly before he disappeared down the hall. 

Virgil stared after him, then looked at Roman. The prince was standing with his eyes closed, hands clenched into fists as he took slow, deep breaths. He was slightly worried that when Roman opened his eyes they would be red again, but as the prince stepped back slightly his eyes were clearly their usual hazel brown. “I’m sorry for butting in, Virgil, but you looked unhappy and he wasn’t backing down. I’ll stay out of your business if you want...”

“No... thank you, Roman. If you hadn’t shown up I don’t know what he might have tried to get me to agree with him... some of Deceit’s tricks aren’t pretty at all, but... well, you already know that.” He bit his lip slightly and looked down. “Besides... we’re friends. Aren’t we?” Virgil looked up again, looking like he honestly wanted an answer from Roman. Confirmation that the prince wasn’t upset with him.

Roman sighed and shrugged slightly. “Well, I still care about you very much, Virgil, and I want you to be happy... and that’s what friends are for, right?” He looked off in the direction that Deceit had gone. “Friends look after each other, friends keep each other, friends... don’t let things like  _ that _ happen.” Roman took a deep breath. It was clear that he was trying to hold in his anger. “...I’ll see you later, dea--...I mean Virgil...” he said quietly before leaving.

Virgil stared after him for a minute, brain overwired with the possibilities if Roman decided to go after Deceit... He shook his head slightly before picking his water bottle up again and slowly heading down to Patton’s room, knocking on the door a little nervously. 

Patton opened it shortly and stepped back a bit to let him into the room. “Heya, kiddo... you look a little shaken. Is everything going okay?” he asked, glancing over at Logan, who was already sitting on the moral side’s bed. Virgil shrugged slightly and set his water bottle on the nightstand, tugging his sleeves over his hands as he sat heavily on the bed next to the logical side, almost collapsing onto the soft mattress.

Logan moved slightly closer. “Virgil, if you don’t mind me pointing it out... you’re expressing some of your usual traits that I have learned mean you’re nervous or uncomfortable. Did something happen recently that you would like to talk to us about? I cannot guarantee that we’ll be able to help, but we can listen and sympathize.”

“Well... something did happen,” he said quietly. Virgil let out a long, shaky breath and leaned slightly against Logan. “...I don’t want to talk about it,” he mumbled. “I just want to get distracted and feel happy with you guys... Can we just do a puzzle or play a board game maybe or something?”

Patton looked at Logan, then sat down on the anxious trait’s other side. “...Of course, kiddo. If that’s what can help make you happy. How about a puzzle?”

***

Roman looked down at the ground as he walked down the hall quickly, feet leading him to the imagination with little instruction from him. He moved swiftly down the hall, speeding up until he made it to the small room he had recently formed and flexed his hands before clenching into fists. 

Suddenly bandages appeared, twisting themselves until they were wrapped snugly around his knuckles. With a breath and a slight shiver, Roman willed away his wings, taking a moment to feel more secure in his balance. He looked down at his hands closely, making sure the wraps were secure and the ends were tucked in before glancing back up at the boxing bag hanging in front of him. The prince then took a slow, deep breath and stepped a bit closer, eyes drifting closed as he stood in silence for a moment.

The sharp thud that echoed through the small, enclosed space when his fist first made contact with the boxing bag a moment later was incredibly satisfying. Roman hit again, three quick punches one after the other. When his mind started to drift to other thoughts... such as a certain snake-like trait... he shook his head sharply to clear them and stepped away from the bag for a moment, taking deep breaths. This wasn’t for catharsis, this was not at all to give him something to pretend was Deceit and hit him. It was to get out that pent-up energy from being angry. 

Then Roman stared at the boxing bag and pushed out all thoughts other than the patterns of his punches. Left, right, left. Right, left, sharp swing from the side with his right. “Head,” “body,” “head,” very quickly, aiming at different spots on the punching bag and speeding up, sweat slowly starting to appear on his forehead and run down his back.

He continued in that manner for quite a while, long enough that he wasn’t actually quite sure how long he had been there. Roman kept making faster and more complicated patterns until he finally stopped and bent over, gasping for breath. 

After a moment to catch his breath, Roman tentatively let his mind wander to what had happened earlier and smiled slightly when he realized that it didn’t make him feel as angry anymore. He wiped the sweat off of his forehead and headed back towards his room, not noticing a certain anxious pair of eyes watching him.

***

“It’s a good sign if the exercise is helping, Roman,” Picani said while writing--or perhaps doodling, Roman had noticed him doing both--in his little book. “Perhaps while this is a good place to start, you should try moving forward to do something less based in violence, since that’s what you were struggling with to start. Maybe running or perhaps flying if you’d prefer?”

Roman shrugged slightly. “Alright, Doc, I could try that... maybe running. Because I do like the sound... if that makes sense. I don’t mean like specifically the sound of hitting something, but... more like it’s something that I’m doing, and it’s audible proof to me... Does that make sense, Picani?”

“It does to me. And while tiring yourself out to give yourself less energy to be angry is a good improvement from where you started, letting yourself think about what you’re angry about--once you’re ready--is helpful. It gives you the time to think about what you were angry about, if you should really be this upset about it, and what you would really like to do about it. If you do that combined with the exercise, it should help you to get better at rationalizing and keeping level headed when whatever provokes your anger surfaces as well.” Emile smiled softly. “But remember, it isn’t a race. It’s about getting you to where you want to be, not about how fast you get there. After all, our beloved Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender didn’t officially join the ‘good’ side until episode 51... of 61. It can be a long journey, but that doesn’t discredit it.”

Roman nodded slightly. “You don’t think I’m a villain, do you Doc?”

“Not at all, Roman.” Picani shook his head. “It just is a parallel to remind you that just because something might take a long while doesn’t mean it’s not a valid change.”

“...Thanks, Dr. Picani.” Roman smiled softly and stood up. “I’ll come see you next week?”

He nodded and shut his book. “Sure thing, but if you feel the need to talk before then just swing on by. As long as I’m not helping someone else, I can always talk about whatever you need.”

“Alright. Thanks again.” He stood up and shook his hand before leaving the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's just one more chapter and then an epilogue, guys. It's absolutely bonkers to me that it's almost over. I hope you all keep enjoying it to the end!  
> -Ro


	39. Some Final Decisions

“Virgil, kiddo,” Patton said softly, almost cautiously as he approached Virgil from the doorway. “Mind if I come in?”

Virgil looked up at him, eyes slightly red. His eyeshadow was smudged and looked as if he hadn’t fixed it or even taken it off the night before, or maybe even in days. The anxious side emerged slightly from his mound of blankets. “Hey, Dad,” he said quietly. “What’s up?”

“I’m just a bit worried about you,” he said quietly, sitting down on the bed next to Virgil. “Of course I want you to do what’s going to make you happy, and help you any way that I can... but you don’t seem happy the way things are right now.”

“Well, this is all that I can do about it,” Virgil mumbled, shrinking back into his cocoon of blankets. “I might not be the happiest that I could be... but I really have no idea what to do other than just sit here and ignore my feelings.” He sighed quietly and looked away. “I just... I can’t just go back to him, Pat, I’m still scared... I’m scared that...”

Patton shifted closer and gently pulled him into his lap, running a hand through his hair. “It’s okay to be scared, kiddo... And you can talk to me about it if you’d like to, if you feel comfortable...”

Virgil clung to him quickly and hid his face against his shoulder, pulling the blankets closer to himself. “I miss him a lot, Patton,” he whispered. “It’s stupid and I feel so ridiculous... I was the one who said we needed to break up, but... but I love him so much...”

“Then why can’t you go back to him?” Patton asked gently. 

“Because I was the one that left him... and I’m... I’m still scared about the whole...” His voice trembled as he trailed off.

Patton nodded slightly and kept running a hand through the anxious side’s hair. “I understand, kiddo. I might be scared too if I were in the same situation, but all of us still love you, Roman included. That’s why he’s trying to be better.”

Virgil looked up. “...He is? How?” 

Patton smiled softly. “Well, he wanted to work it out, and then tell you himself when he got a bit better at it... but yes, Roman has been talking to someone else to figure out how he can control himself more.” He gently played with Virgil’s hair.

He closed his eyes and nodded slightly. “Do you... do you know who he talked to?”

***

Virgil knocked cautiously on the door and stood awkwardly until it opened and a kind face smiled at him. 

“Hey there, Virgil. What can I do to help you?” Doctor Picani stepped back slightly to let him into the room. He shut the door behind them and sat in his chair.

Virgil sat down and pulled his hoodie a bit closer. “Well... I heard that Roman was talking to someone about getting better with some stuff... and I was wondering if it was you.”

Emile smiled gently at him. “I’m not allowed to tell anyone who wasn’t part of a session what was discussed then, Virgil. It’s an issue of doctor-patient confidentiality. I may technically be an imaginary therapist, but I treat that as a secondary fact. The primary fact to me is that people might confide real secrets, and that’s why it’s important to keep that information confidential.”

“That makes sense, sorry Doc...” He looked down at the ground, missing the look that Picani gave him. A slight head tilt and frown, then picking up his notebook. “Stupid of me to ask...”

“Now don’t say that, Virge,” the therapist said firmly. “Reaching out to try and understand what’s going on isn’t stupid at all. You can give yourself credit for doing something that’s out of your comfort zone, and just because it didn’t end up exactly how you hoped doesn’t mean that it was a waste.”

“How is that not a waste?” Virgil said, an edge creeping into his voice. “I embarrassed myself while asking you to break one of your most important rules.”

Picani drew something in his book. “But you didn’t know that it was. And you learned something, and I’m not offended, promise.” He smiled gently. “...But you know, it’s also good to try and look for help for yourself, Marcy.”

Virgil frowned slightly in confusion. “Marcy?”

“Whoops, sorry, my train of thought was trying to drive on two different tracks,” he said cheerfully. “Let’s just hope Joy doesn’t accidentally derail it completely so we can continue.”

“What do you mean, continue? I was here to ask about Roman.”

Emile shifted a bit closer to him. “I know that, but if you’re willing, I’d like to talk to you for a little while. Because from what I’ve heard, you’ve been pretty reserved for the past while and sometimes just saying your thoughts out loud makes it easier to understand them, or just feel like what you’re thinking is less crazy.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Virgil said quietly, tugging at his sleeves.

“Are you sure?” Picani asked him gently. “Because this isn’t really something that I would say as a therapist, but as a friend I know that I would want to.”

He sat silently on the couch and stared at the ground, chewing a piece of dry skin on his lip. After a long time of silence, Virgil took a shaky breath and said in a louder voice than he intended to, “I’m just so confused, you know? Because I love him but I’m... I’m scared of him...”

The therapist made a gentle noise of agreement and flipped the page of his book. “I understand. But the question is, how much of that fear is actually of Roman, and how much has to do with... your other relationship?” he asked gently.

***

Roman helped Patton with making lunch, chopping up vegetables for them to have while Patton stirred the pasta on the stove. “The cheese sauce is just about done!” Patton said cheerfully. He looked over to where Logan was sat at the table reading. “I suggest you put your book away now, Lolo, otherwise your serious book is gonna get pretty cheesy.” He giggled. Logan sighed and shook his head slightly, but smiled as he set the book to the side.

“Why don’t I go and see if Virgil feels like joining us or if we should leave him some leftovers?” Roman offered, setting the tray of vegetables on the table.

Patton shared a look with Logan before nodding. “Sure thing, kiddo. We’ll start setting the table, and I’ll grab him a plate in case he wants to join us for lunch.”

Roman nodded back at him and headed down the hall, knocking on the anxious side’s door. He frowned slightly at the lack of response and knocks again. “Virgil?”

“Roman.”

He turned and accidentally pushed Virgil back slightly with his wing. “Oh, I’m sorry Virgil!” The prince tucked his wings back against his body. “I expected you’d be in your room.”

“Yeah, I was just....” Virgil gestured vaguely. “...Talking to someone, hanging with the characters. What is it?”

Roman stepped back slightly so he wasn’t blocking the anxious trait from getting into his room if he wanted to. “We were just finishing up making lunch, and I came to ask if you’d like to eat with us. Pat made homemade macaroni and cheese and I cut some veggies.”

Virgil tugged his sleeves down over his hands. “I... I dunno...” he said quietly, not looking up at the prince.

“No pressure at all.” Roman smiled gently. “If you don’t want to eat with us, I can make sure a plate is left for you since I know how much you enjoy Patton’s pasta.”

“I do,” he said softly. “...I’ll come join the three of you in a minute, I just want to get ready for a minute.” He moved past the prince and into his room. 

Roman hummed softly to himself as he glided down the hall and back to the kitchen. “He’s getting changed I believe, but Virgil is going to come eat with us,” he announced cheerfully to the others, who were setting the table. “I’ll grab you guys your drinks. Logan, coffee, Pat, tea?” he confirmed, getting mugs out of the cupboard and humming Once Upon A Dream.

“Hot chocolate please!” Patton looked over as Virgil walked into the dining room, hoodie wrapped around him and makeup pale on his face. 

“Hey guys,” he said quietly as he slid into his seat. He glanced at the other sides and looked down again when Roman returned with two mugs held in each hand. 

“Coffee... hot chocolate for Padre,” he said as he set down their drinks. “Want your usual coffee, Virge?” Roman asked, offering a cup in his direction. “A decent amount of milk, enough sugar to thoroughly disgust Logan and just a little hot chocolate?”

Virgil looked taken aback as he took the mug from Roman. “Yeah... thanks, Ro,” he said softly. He took a small sip and was shocked at how good it tasted.

Patton smiled at them and served pasta out to all of them. “You guys can just help yourselves to those veggies there.” He sat down and they all tucked into their food.

***

Logan waved the other sides away as he cleared their plates. “I will wash the dishes, it’s quite alright,” he said firmly as Patton tried to stand and take the plates from him. The moral side sighed softly and settled on kissing his cheek in thanks before going to his room.

“...I think I’m going to go back to my room now,” Virgil said quietly.

Roman nodded to him. “Sounds good. Would you mind if I walked with you?” he asked politely. With a slight moment of hesitation first, the anxious side nodded and the two of them walked down the hall together.

Virgil hunched his shoulders up slightly. “...Why did you want to walk with me?” he asked quietly.

Roman looked at him with gentle eyes. “I wanted a chance to properly apologize. I realized that I never actually said that I was sorry for making you feel uncomfortable, and I am. Very sorry. Which is why I’ve been getting Dr. Picani to help he to deal with my anger problems and try to get better at controlling myself. I hope to get to a point where you won’t have to feel uneasy around me.”

“You...” Virgil stared at him.

“Of course it’s not entirely because of you,” the prince added with a smile. “But in honesty you are the reason that I realized it had gotten so bad.”

He tilted his head slightly. “Well... I’m glad that you’re getting better, Roman,” Virgil said quietly, hands in his pockets so the creative side wouldn’t be able to see how they were shaking.

“Thank you, our wonderful worry wart.” Roman smiled wider, then hesitated as they reached a certain door painted black. “...Virgil, may I ask something with no caveates that you have to agree, or even answer right now?”

Virgil looked at Roman, shivering a little more. “Uh... sure, go ahead.”

“If, at some point in the future when I’ve gotten better, you feel comfortable around me again... would you be willing to try... us... again?”

“Roman Sanders, I want to be able to help you. I hate feeling like I’m hiding from you, because I thought that you hated me after everything... and I, well...”

With tears in his eyes, Virgil tugged the prince closer and kissed him.

Roman pulled away gently and brushed Virgil’s hair out of his eyes. “Is that a yes, darling?” he asked sweetly.

“Absolutely,” the anxious side whispered. “And I want to be there to help you through it.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAHHHHHHHH there's just the epilogue now! I don't want to use up all the things I want to say when it's finished but I'm having trouble coming to terms with the fact that this fic is ending... Jeez it's been going for so long  
> Anyways, take care of yourselves  
> -Ro


	40. Epilogue

Roman walked out of Dr. Picani’s office again, this time hand in hand with Virgil. They had agreed to continue going to see him together, so they could talk about themselves but also about their relationship. Virgil leaned against Roman slightly and smiled softly. “...You’re so sweet, Roman, you really don’t have to worry about that.”

“Well you were so scared of me for a while that you broke up with me, I feel justified.” Roman gently bumped their shoulders together.

He smiled softly. “I guess that’s fair... but I’m not going to break, and I trust you to stop if I ask you to.” Virgil chuckled quietly. “Poor Picani looked just a little awkward, but at least we talked about it a little.”

“Heya there! Great timing, kiddos, dinner’s ready!” Patton announced cheerfully to them as they headed back into the main area of the mindscape, the moral side setting the dish on the table. Logan was walking to the table at that moment. “Virge, just letting you know... Deceit is going to join us tonight,” he said gently.

Virgil leaned against Roman and nodded slightly. “Okay,” he said fairly easily, though he scooted his chair closer to the prince’s as the two of them sat down.

Roman kept his hand linked with Virgil’s under the table. “...Are you okay?” he asked quietly.

The anxious side hesitated a moment before answering. “I’m... I’m kinda uneasy,” he replied near a whisper. “But I’m sure that this will be okay.” He squeezed Roman’s hand gently as Deceit came around the corner and sat down between Roman and Logan.

“Alright, tuck in!” Patton smiled again as he sat down in the remaining chair.

***

Virgil stood to help Patton clear the table when they were finished. Deceit turned to speak to Roman as the other two headed to the kitchen. “You do not look well,” he said a bit coldly.

Roman tilted his head back slightly. “Thank you, Deceit. I’ve been exercising.” He smiled as genuinely as he could at the trait. The prince’s smile widened more when Virgil sat next to him again, carrying a stack of bowls, and Patton procured a bucket of ice cream. 

“Who wants some dessert?” the fatherly trait asked happily, starting to scoop it into the bowls as Virgil passed out spoons. 

There was another small silence as all five of them ate their ice cream. Deceit rolled his eyes and sighed and made a quiet noise of disgust as Virgil fed Roman some from his spoon. Patton giggled and tried to do the same, but Logan turned his head at just the wrong time and suddenly there was somehow ice cream everywhere. 

Logan sighed, but smiled softly as he shook his head. “Goodness, Patton... let me clean that up.” He kissed his cheek before standing up. Patton giggled quietly.

Virgil squeezed Roman’s hand under the table, and he glanced from his boyfriend to the stony look that Deceit was giving him. “Well I’m feeling like a quiet night,” Roman said. “Want to go watch a movie in my room, love?” Virgil nodded and stood up with him, the pair saying quick good nights and thanking Patton for dinner before heading down the hall. 

Virgil sighed softly. “Sorry for making you skip out on the others like that,” he said quietly.

“Nonsense. The well being of my dark angel far surpasses any other need. I would do anything for you, my love.”

“Tell me my hair looks prettier than yours.”

“...I would do almost anything for you, love.”

Virgil laughed as he flopped down onto Roman’s bed, watching the prince look through his collection of Disney movies. “...You’re a dork, you know that?” he said gently. “You’re a giant, insecure, stubborn, single minded dork... and I love you.”

“Good thing you do, or this would be a little awkward,” Roman quipped, sitting down next to Virgil. “Because I love you so much I don’t even know what to do with myself.”

The two leaned against each other as the opening credits rolled. Neither were perfect, in fact they both still had a lot of issues. But they had each other, and were willing to be there to help the one that they loved.

...And is there really a happier ending than that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OHHHHH boy I can't believe it's actually done! I've been doing this rp, and then continuing the story for you guys, for so long it's hard to believe that it's over, even though I just wrote the end! Okay, time to get sappy.  
> I would like to thank my fantastic girlfriend, who helped me with the Cartoon Therapy session, came up with chapter titles with me, and also is just perfect in every way and I love her <3 another person who helped me was a good friend who I won't name by name because I didn't ask her but she knows who she is  
> Also to everyone who commented telling me how much you enjoyed the story--Lightseed, quantumducky, Nico.Thomas.Jack.Hiccup.Fandoms, poppiess, Confused_person, LovelyIKnow, RomanoCheesy, rosesisupposes, Salty_And_Sassy_Sarcasm, Kel_Sticks, NicoAndTheNineGalaxies, gaycheesecake93 and many more, you all light up my heart when I see how much you love the story or writing (or scream about how awful I am to the boys--about 70%/30% on those lol) Also anyone who left kudos or just read the story I seriously love you all, and I hope you all enjoyed it to the end. I tried to give them a happy ending because I felt that they deserved it after all that I put them through. I do plan to write other stories in the future, though probably not quite this long :) If you ever want to chat just comment, you can ask for my IG (that's where I rp btw)  
> Anyways, I love you all and hope that you'll continue to take care of yourselves without me reminding you to twice a week  
> Keep making good choices, okay?  
> With love from your Ren  
> -Ro


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